Sushiroll

Hi there, I need to stop drinking. My drinking has progressively gotten worse over the last ten years. My problem is I go from being 100% committed to giving up to I wasn't that bad in the blink of an eye. My usual drinking time started an hour ago and already it's all I can think about. I want my life back. I want to enjoy it and remember it. I've just started Allen Carr's book but apart from that my plan at the moment is to change up my evening routine and not drink. I am so addicted to that numb feeling. I drink even when I don't feel like it. This is my third attempt in 14 months. I'm rambling now I guess I'm here for accountability and to work out how others are getting and staying sober.

Dee74

Welcome aboard sushiroll

i found using support here really helped me - I drank pretty ,much like it seem you do.

It really meant something to me to find others who understood

D

snitch

We all started with a day one.

Welcome.

I was so addic

snitch

We all started with a day one.

Welcome.

I was so addicted to alcohol I couldn't do ANYTHING without it. Countless day ones and swearing off for good. 19 months ago, I was totally broken. Alcohol had me beat. It was get sober or die. I chose to get sober. Sober Recovery and AA have saved my life. 19 and a half months sober and I have my life back. There were days I wanted to crawl out of my skin I felt so uncomfortable. I also drank to numb out. I am not going to lie, it wasn't easy. But I made sobriety my number one priority. I took it one day at a time and my only goal was to get my head on my pillow sober. AA gave me (and is still giving me) the tools to live life sober. I had no idea how to do that. Daily drinker for 20 years. Full of anger, resentment, self pity, guilt and shame. It is not like that today.

Keep close. Keep it in the day, the hour or even the minute. Lots of people here who have gotten sober. There is hope!

🙏❤

C0ntr0ls

+1 snitch

August252015

welcome!

Sushiroll

Thank you for the warm welcome guys.

Snitch your post gave me so much hope. Thank you.

I'm off to bed sober.
Day 1 done.

SoberRican

Welcome glad you came here. So you want to give up the sauce. Smart choice my friend. Like most said this **** is not easy by no means. Well it is and it isn't. But it starts with day one. Thats it. Worry about today. Rest hydrate .prepare yourself the journey is awesome once you get past some of the hurdles it gets easier I promise you. ✌

DriGuy

Can't get past the first day? I suppose that sounds odd to friends and loved ones, but there is absolutely nothing strange about it to people here. If it's any consolation, there is nothing that strikes us as insurmountable with your problem. At my worst, I seldom got past the first day, except on rare occasions when I made it to three. And when I say rare, I mean like 4 times in the last three years of my drinking 24 years ago.

But it's a start. Just to make sure you don't misunderstand, the object is not to make it to one day and slip, and then make it to two days and slip, then three days and slip, and so on. I never heard of this, although strange things do happen. It's not about building up stronger and more lengthy periods of will power. It's actually about not needing will power, and as counter intuitive as it sounds, this is the transformation that takes place in recovery.

What you need to do is put the pieces together to make it happen. The pieces are facts, information, personal insights, resolutions, and commitments to your self, usually at a deeper level than just saying the words to yourself. You have to put the pieces together on your own, in ways that make sense to you, but we can help with that to get you started, and when you stumble, we can help there too.

Imagine not losing the battle with those nagging needs because your will power runs out. Imagine not even needing will power. It happens. It almost seems like a miracle, although that's what happens when you break the vicious circle.

Good luck. I'm glad your here.

Sushiroll

Thank you SoberRican and DriGuy.
I've been doing alot of soul searching the last 12 months or so. My life is pretty great except for this damn addiction. I'm so shy and awkward I don't know how to be without a little numb. Guess I'm about to find out. Time to make a commitment to myself and stick to it.

cantsleep123

I'm on Day 1 as well. I look forward to posting in your Day 2 thread tomorrow.

gypsytears

Hi & welcome sushiroll. I’m glad you’ve made it through day 1 and have the commitment. That’s the hardest thing I think.

saoutchik

Well done on posting Sushiroll, I was a daily drinker and so when I quit my mind was just doing somersaults because for once it wasn't getting its daily dose of poison. I suppose that's a part of what addiction is. The good news is that eventually you will not feel like you do now, your mind will readjust to going to bed at night sober. You just have to get through those tough early days.

Hevyn

Hi Sushiroll - I'm so glad you joined us. When I joined SR I'd been drinking for decades. I found my anxiety lessened when I read and posted here - everyone understood how I felt. Others in my life - not so much. You are never alone, and things will get better as you get some sober time behind you.

You can do it - and life will be so much better.

August252015

Good job on the day sushiroll! And I love something you said "my life is pretty great" except for the drinking. Why? Because it is only better when someone who needs to stop drinking does, in my experience. Better to me means more free, more clear and I am not being influenced in any way by something I don't have to put in my body (and mind) in the first place.

And the things that you might discover aren't as great after all, those become manageable too as you change your perspective and make different choices.

Keep going!

Sushiroll

Hi August.
Yes, "more free" and "more clear" that's what I'm looking for. I feel trapped by alcohol at the moment.

Dee74

How was day 2?

D

August252015

Yep, that stunning at the time realization that we don't actually have to ever drink again is freeing for sure! Then we figure out how to keep making the choice not to, over and over.

Surrendered19

At the start of your journey SushiRoll, have a daily plan for your cravings. I am on day 20 - still very new to this sober thing, and it is wonderful in so many ways. But the nag-headed voice in my head still wants me to drink, particularly now that I am feeling so good. There are different kinds of plans, but at first one plan you should use is a daily schedule. Write down your agenda for the day and pay particular attention to your craving time. Mine is rapidly shrinking but still there right around 5:00 p.m. One of the many wise people here on RS pointed out to me that the entire food and liquor retail establishment don't call it "happy hour" for no reason. They KNOW that is when many of us are very vulnerable. Good luck SushiRoll. I am amazed by RS and I think you will be too. Strangers that have been sober for years, well within their rights to fly away and not give us the time of day, but nevertheless on here encouraging us newcomers. I am grateful.

Sushiroll

Thanks Surrendered. 5pm is my time too. If I can hang off till at least 7pm then I know I'm in the clear for the night. I'm working on a new evening routine and daily plan to keep me busy. Well done on 20 days that's really great.

Day 2 went well Dee. Just waking up to day 3.
I took my dogs for a walk yesterday at 5pm and all I could think about was "I really wasn't that bad" because sometimes I'm not but that's not the point because other times I am that bad. I just know deep down I'm headed down a road I don't want to be on anymore. My biggest hurdle will be Friday night and the weekend. I'm already planning but worried.