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Originally Posted by Tatsy 
Sweeti, I’m saddened to read this. Why couldn’t you get up off the floor? What was physically stopping you for five hours, from moving your body into a crawling or other position, so that you could get back onto the lounge sofa? What changed after five hours, to enable you to get back up off the floor?
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Originally Posted by Sweetichick2
It’s because I had no strength in my arms. Whether it’s the neuropathy, being plain drunk, unfit and overweight. Plus I had taken my bpd medication.Now I take it when I am virtually in bed. I don’t know what happened after 5 hours maybe sobered up. Thanks for askin Tatsy.
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Sweeti, when do you see your doctor again? Psychologist? I think it would be a good time to have an honest conversation with them. If they do not offer rehab or some sort of help based on all of your symptoms and continued inability to stop drinking on your own I think it might be time to find a new doctor.
I had some heart issues going on a few years ago. My primary care doctor tried to blame stress, and the first cardiologist said it’s probably just menopause starting. I pushed and demanded that insurance get me a new consult, the new doctor specialized in the electrical system of the heart and was able to figure out what was going on and come up with a treatment plan in my first visit. That’s what you need from your doctors. Use this new week to advocate for yourself, don’t allow them to blow you off, and don’t allow yourself to make an excuse as to why you can’t do this.
I had some heart issues going on a few years ago. My primary care doctor tried to blame stress, and the first cardiologist said it’s probably just menopause starting. I pushed and demanded that insurance get me a new consult, the new doctor specialized in the electrical system of the heart and was able to figure out what was going on and come up with a treatment plan in my first visit. That’s what you need from your doctors. Use this new week to advocate for yourself, don’t allow them to blow you off, and don’t allow yourself to make an excuse as to why you can’t do this.
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I saw my psychiatrist. He thinks I am the victim of parental alienation plus the kids have rejected me due to my mental illness and alcoholism. I lost the kids 13 years ago and they how much would they truly remember. It’s all what’s been told to them. I was un dergoiing urine testing at that time.
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Sweeti, why don't you sell your car and use that money to get to rehab?
You can make use of public transport to get to doctor's appointments if needed.
You never drive very far anyway - just to the drive through.
Thinking of you
You can make use of public transport to get to doctor's appointments if needed.
You never drive very far anyway - just to the drive through.
Thinking of you
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Location: California
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Originally Posted by Sweetichick2
I saw my psychiatrist. He thinks I am the victim of parental alienation plus the kids have rejected me due to my mental illness and alcoholism. I lost the kids 13 years ago and they how much would they truly remember. It’s all what’s been told to them. I was un dergoiing urine testing at that time.
I really hope you will take some positive steps in recovery this week.
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Join Date: Dec 2012
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Sweetie I am praying hard for you to make a decision on how to get sober and follow through with it. And it seems like it needs to be bigger than just posting here. Which I am very glad you do.
You can't have a relationship with your kids, parents or anyone if you aren't here. And you have some seriously scary medical stuff happening. You not being able to get off the floor for hours scares me for you and breaks my heart.
I know it is scary to think about rehab, but if you could just not over think it and have the courage to pick up the phone and call without overthinking it it could change your whole life and be a wonderful thing. I bet they would work out money issues with you if you told them you are desperate to get help. That is what they are there for. They want to help you!
If I where in your shoes right now I would beg, borrow and do whatever to try and get my life back. Sobriety is so wonderful. But this time next year you could look back and say wow I am so happy and proud of myself for making that call and making it work.
I'm not normally one to post like this. But I felt compelled to. I really hope you will take to heart what I've had to say.
Lots of love to you. I beleive in you.
You can't have a relationship with your kids, parents or anyone if you aren't here. And you have some seriously scary medical stuff happening. You not being able to get off the floor for hours scares me for you and breaks my heart.
I know it is scary to think about rehab, but if you could just not over think it and have the courage to pick up the phone and call without overthinking it it could change your whole life and be a wonderful thing. I bet they would work out money issues with you if you told them you are desperate to get help. That is what they are there for. They want to help you!
If I where in your shoes right now I would beg, borrow and do whatever to try and get my life back. Sobriety is so wonderful. But this time next year you could look back and say wow I am so happy and proud of myself for making that call and making it work.
I'm not normally one to post like this. But I felt compelled to. I really hope you will take to heart what I've had to say.
Lots of love to you. I beleive in you.
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Join Date: Mar 2018
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Hi Sweeti how are you doing today? Just wanted to add it’s really not a good idea to take your BPD meds whilst your drinking. It really f’s you up in my personal experience. Probably something else to discuss with your psych. Anyway wishing you a positive & sober week ahead and hopefully change will come to put you on the path to recovery.
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Originally Posted by Sweetichick2
I saw my psychiatrist. He thinks I am the victim of parental alienation plus the kids have rejected me due to my mental illness and alcoholism. I lost the kids 13 years ago and they how much would they truly remember. It’s all what’s been told to them. I was un dergoiing urine testing at that time.
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Join Date: Nov 2017
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Parental alienation is a form of child abuse. Not to be confused with protecting children from an absent, alcoholic parent who is potentially a danger to the child.
It is extremely hard to win custody on parental alienation, but it is the reason we had custody of my step son for the 8 years before he came of age.
I really hope for your sake s-chick, you get yourself together. Your children are old enough to choose, if there is a glimmer of light near the door, it is never closed, but your drink, stop for a day or two, start again, not recognize your own children, blame someone else for that, drink harder, well that glimmer of light is getting pretty dim. Eventually the door will close all the way and it will be your own fault.
We have a lot of teens who come to our farm, in situations where one or both parents are addicts, some are in the system, some aren't. They make up a portion of those we have started helping. Those poor babies, (I say babies, some are darn near ready to age out), they are broken by the adults who should have protected them. You still have time, please do it, please get help.
It is extremely hard to win custody on parental alienation, but it is the reason we had custody of my step son for the 8 years before he came of age.
I really hope for your sake s-chick, you get yourself together. Your children are old enough to choose, if there is a glimmer of light near the door, it is never closed, but your drink, stop for a day or two, start again, not recognize your own children, blame someone else for that, drink harder, well that glimmer of light is getting pretty dim. Eventually the door will close all the way and it will be your own fault.
We have a lot of teens who come to our farm, in situations where one or both parents are addicts, some are in the system, some aren't. They make up a portion of those we have started helping. Those poor babies, (I say babies, some are darn near ready to age out), they are broken by the adults who should have protected them. You still have time, please do it, please get help.
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Originally Posted by Sweetichick2
I saw my psychiatrist. He thinks I am the victim of parental alienation plus the kids have rejected me due to my mental illness and alcoholism. I lost the kids 13 years ago and they how much would they truly remember. It’s all what’s been told to them. I was un dergoiing urine testing at that time.
I am truly sorry for any pain you've been through and continue to experience. I am sorry for the pain in your own life and in the lives of those around you. Mental illness is difficult. Alcoholism is another form of mental illness. I truly want you and your family to heal and find peace.
But none of that will get you sober. There is no magical moment when you suddenly "discover why you drink" that will cure you.
The only cure is to stop drinking. And then get help to deal with the damage and learn how to heal.
What are you doing TODAY? You can't heal from yesterday if you keep drinking over it today.
Get honest with yourself, Sweeti.
What are you willing to do to get sober?
Always pulling for you.
PS And I think your daughter, from what you've said, can see with her own eyes what's going on. My heart breaks for you both. I bet she would want you in your life if you can start taking care of you. I'm sure she loves you, but can't handle seeing you kill yourself. I hope you can reconcile with her someday.
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Originally Posted by AnvilheadII
you stated that you fell off the COUCH and were on the floor for many hours - how can you then justify that it is OK to operate a motor vehicle because you are OK sitting down??
and if you are "ok because you are sitting down" why are you not able to make GP appointments, travel anywhere but the liquor establishment? this is the very definition of insanity.
when asked what your recovery PLAN was, you didn't have an answer. not one single idea about what you might do different now. regardless of the hundreds of supportive suggestions you have been given. not one single action.
as the shared article clearly stated, one must want sobriety more than anything else, and then take actions to that end. i wonder if you even have a clear concept of what SOBRIETY is........it is not managing to not drink for 48 hours. it is not experiencing horrible withdrawal over and over and over again every few days. it is not finding yet another excuse as to why you drank again.
i don't know if there is anything that anyone can share here that will make a difference. the Big Book describes certain alcoholics who cannot get sober as being "constitutionally incapable of being honest with THEMSELVES".
the only way to find out if you can achieve long-lived sobriety is to fully and completely devote yourself - mind, body and spirit - to the enterprise. make the commitment and take action. cease to use excuses and trade them in for using the tools of recovery. every minute of every day.
undoubtedly you will be back, claiming you are starting to feel better now. but not better enough to DO anything different.
i'm curious where you are with your valium intake? do you still rely upon valium to replace alcohol, until you run out and swiftly return to the bottle? have you spoken with COMPLETE honesty to both your GP and psychiatrist about your condition? do you tell them the same story? have you considered a joint appointment with both of them or a conference call so that everyone hears the same words?
there are two questions we should ask ourselves each day:
1. What am I WILLING to do for my recovery today?
2. What WILL I do today for my recovery?
notice they are not the same question. one talks about our willingness....and the other talks about ACTION taken in the immediate present - not later today or tomorrow or when i feel better.
and if you are "ok because you are sitting down" why are you not able to make GP appointments, travel anywhere but the liquor establishment? this is the very definition of insanity.
when asked what your recovery PLAN was, you didn't have an answer. not one single idea about what you might do different now. regardless of the hundreds of supportive suggestions you have been given. not one single action.
as the shared article clearly stated, one must want sobriety more than anything else, and then take actions to that end. i wonder if you even have a clear concept of what SOBRIETY is........it is not managing to not drink for 48 hours. it is not experiencing horrible withdrawal over and over and over again every few days. it is not finding yet another excuse as to why you drank again.
i don't know if there is anything that anyone can share here that will make a difference. the Big Book describes certain alcoholics who cannot get sober as being "constitutionally incapable of being honest with THEMSELVES".
the only way to find out if you can achieve long-lived sobriety is to fully and completely devote yourself - mind, body and spirit - to the enterprise. make the commitment and take action. cease to use excuses and trade them in for using the tools of recovery. every minute of every day.
undoubtedly you will be back, claiming you are starting to feel better now. but not better enough to DO anything different.
i'm curious where you are with your valium intake? do you still rely upon valium to replace alcohol, until you run out and swiftly return to the bottle? have you spoken with COMPLETE honesty to both your GP and psychiatrist about your condition? do you tell them the same story? have you considered a joint appointment with both of them or a conference call so that everyone hears the same words?
there are two questions we should ask ourselves each day:
1. What am I WILLING to do for my recovery today?
2. What WILL I do today for my recovery?
notice they are not the same question. one talks about our willingness....and the other talks about ACTION taken in the immediate present - not later today or tomorrow or when i feel better.
This. Please reread it over and over again. Lots of good advice and truth here.
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Originally Posted by Sweetichick2
I saw my psychiatrist. He thinks I am the victim of parental alienation plus the kids have rejected me due to my mental illness and alcoholism. I lost the kids 13 years ago and they how much would they truly remember. It’s all what’s been told to them. I was un dergoiing urine testing at that time.
What did your psychiatrist suggest doing with this diagnosis?
What are you going to do with it?
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Originally Posted by gypsytears
You are only a victim if you continue to drink.
What did your psychiatrist suggest doing with this diagnosis?
What are you going to do with it?
What did your psychiatrist suggest doing with this diagnosis?
What are you going to do with it?
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Location: Australia
Posts: 211,442
Gypsy meant in terms of your recovery.
You really should be the busiest poster on this thread, Sweetichick, telling us what you're doing day by day to stay sober.
We all have regret and things that bring us pain from our past.. You can either decide to let those things continue to bring you pain, or try and rise above them.
D
You really should be the busiest poster on this thread, Sweetichick, telling us what you're doing day by day to stay sober.
We all have regret and things that bring us pain from our past.. You can either decide to let those things continue to bring you pain, or try and rise above them.
D
not a greeter
Join Date: Nov 2006
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Originally Posted by Sweetichick2
There’s nothing I can do.kidsare long gone.
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