Happy in recovery - 6+ months
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Nov 2019
Location: Australia
Posts: 4
Happy in recovery - 6+ months
Hello good people at Sober Recovery,
My name's Alex and I am recovering addict and alcoholic.
I used to post quite a lot here 5-6 years ago (Gnarlyboots) but I have long forgotten my old details so here I am, reborn. Hallelujah.
The last two decades of my life I have been in almost constant active addiction, give or take a few months here and there. I used everything and anything, when I was being 'bad' it was opiates & stimulants when I being 'good', it was a booze & pharmaceuticals. I loved them all equally, anything to take me away from the pain of being myself, it was all the same and self numbing was the name of my game.
I have survived through mental illness (still can be fragile), all sorts of trauma, drug induced psychosis, overdoses and countless court appearances. By all accounts, I really shouldn't be alive.
Anyway the real reason for my post is to say that I've made it to 6 months and 3 days, totally clean and sober today. No drinking, no drugs, nothing! I can attribute this to a number of different things but really just wanted to reconnect with the good people on this board. I remember in my darker days I would read and read the posts here, trying to find the inspiration to get sober / clean or just to relate to other peoples struggles to help myself feel better.
It feels good to be clean and sober, I still pinch myself some days that I am actually finally doing this. And some days can still really suck and be painful as hell but I am slowly coming to face 'life on life's terms' and it feels alright.
So today I am just in gratitude for never having to face another hangover again, never having to agonize over controlling my drinking or using, never have to walk the streets in the cold sweat of opiate withdrawals, or the paranoia of benzo withdrawal hell. All I have to do is not pick up that first drink or drug and everything else will work out OK.
-A
My name's Alex and I am recovering addict and alcoholic.
I used to post quite a lot here 5-6 years ago (Gnarlyboots) but I have long forgotten my old details so here I am, reborn. Hallelujah.
The last two decades of my life I have been in almost constant active addiction, give or take a few months here and there. I used everything and anything, when I was being 'bad' it was opiates & stimulants when I being 'good', it was a booze & pharmaceuticals. I loved them all equally, anything to take me away from the pain of being myself, it was all the same and self numbing was the name of my game.
I have survived through mental illness (still can be fragile), all sorts of trauma, drug induced psychosis, overdoses and countless court appearances. By all accounts, I really shouldn't be alive.
Anyway the real reason for my post is to say that I've made it to 6 months and 3 days, totally clean and sober today. No drinking, no drugs, nothing! I can attribute this to a number of different things but really just wanted to reconnect with the good people on this board. I remember in my darker days I would read and read the posts here, trying to find the inspiration to get sober / clean or just to relate to other peoples struggles to help myself feel better.
It feels good to be clean and sober, I still pinch myself some days that I am actually finally doing this. And some days can still really suck and be painful as hell but I am slowly coming to face 'life on life's terms' and it feels alright.
So today I am just in gratitude for never having to face another hangover again, never having to agonize over controlling my drinking or using, never have to walk the streets in the cold sweat of opiate withdrawals, or the paranoia of benzo withdrawal hell. All I have to do is not pick up that first drink or drug and everything else will work out OK.
-A
Blue Belt
Join Date: Jul 2015
Location: Soberville, USA
Posts: 4,174
My doc was booze. I was addicted for about 50 years. Now that I quit, I am learning to live without the crutch.
I guess i will never stop telling everyone here that booze causes irreversible brain damage. My brain has rewired. There are parts of my brain that are forever altered. I learned here that drinking again will send me quickly right back where I was.
That is never going to happen. I am a proud non drinker until I die. I hate booze.
I still do some coffee and energy drinks sometimes. Both can mess me up, especially energy drinks.
I find I obsess less these days, but I still want to get to the point of being able to just decide, i don't give a friggen bit about something, and just turn it off. I feel like I am close, but things seem to trigger this.
Being clean is amazing. I dealt with hellish agoraphobia for a few years. It makes feeling normal feel amazing. Like every second of every day feels amazing compared to being scared of my own shadow.
Nobody but folks here knew I dealt with this mental issue and I am so glad I didn't see a Dr. about it. Otherwise, i would likely be on some rx to fix what is now fixed. I pretty much hate going to the Dr. But, i love living and myself, so I go to the Dr. to try and take care of me.
Hope this helps you in someway. I decided a while back to never give advice, only to relate and tell stories about myself etc.
Thanks.
I guess i will never stop telling everyone here that booze causes irreversible brain damage. My brain has rewired. There are parts of my brain that are forever altered. I learned here that drinking again will send me quickly right back where I was.
That is never going to happen. I am a proud non drinker until I die. I hate booze.
I still do some coffee and energy drinks sometimes. Both can mess me up, especially energy drinks.
I find I obsess less these days, but I still want to get to the point of being able to just decide, i don't give a friggen bit about something, and just turn it off. I feel like I am close, but things seem to trigger this.
Being clean is amazing. I dealt with hellish agoraphobia for a few years. It makes feeling normal feel amazing. Like every second of every day feels amazing compared to being scared of my own shadow.
Nobody but folks here knew I dealt with this mental issue and I am so glad I didn't see a Dr. about it. Otherwise, i would likely be on some rx to fix what is now fixed. I pretty much hate going to the Dr. But, i love living and myself, so I go to the Dr. to try and take care of me.
Hope this helps you in someway. I decided a while back to never give advice, only to relate and tell stories about myself etc.
Thanks.
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