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Old 10-30-2019, 11:54 AM
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Advice.. pregnant

Hi! I’m 32 and had months of heavy drinking (a couple of glasses to a bottle of wine) most nights of the week (at least 5). It was a bad habit that had gotten worse with time. I found out around 4 weeks that I was pregnant. I stopped drinking and started taking prenatal vitamins. I was too embarrassed to talk to my doctor about this. Has this happened to anyone? Is your/was your baby ok? I’m so scared now.
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Old 10-30-2019, 12:12 PM
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Welcome and congratulations on your pregnancy.

The main thing is that you are not drinking now, but I think it would be a good idea to talk to your doctor. And, it might help ease your concerns.

I hope you're planning to remain sober throughout the pregnancy and beyond. Maybe you could think about a recovery plan so you are prepared to stay sober when the baby arrives.
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Old 10-30-2019, 12:20 PM
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Hi! Thank you! I’m so excited, but just hope that I haven’t screwed things up. I do not plan on drinking once this baby comes. My husband is on board. I feel dumb because I’ve already had my 8 week appointment and denied concerns and didn’t mention my drinking. I will likely call or send them a message to ease my concerns, but I really don’t want to be labeled or looked at differently. On top of it, I suffer from anxiety, which is not being helped.
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Old 10-30-2019, 12:26 PM
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I unknowingly drank in the early weeks of pregnancy.... I think many do. I didn’t drink as much as you did, but once I found out, I stopped drinking and started taking vitamins.

i was honest with my doctor and you are still very early on... so I would be honest and not embarrassed. The goal here is to have a happy healthy pregnancy.... and it sounds like you are on the right track.

congratulations!

and just a word from a mom of three who is now on this site for a reason.... don’t go back to drinking once you become a mom. I regret that now and there’s nothing I can do. My oldest graduates high school this year, and there are some drunken moments in her presence that I wish I could desperately take back.

enjoy every second. It goes by fast.
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Old 10-30-2019, 01:34 PM
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Honesty is really the best policy....tell your doctor...you need to share that with him/her and he/she can help you as well as help you with your anxiety. If you're afraid to be honest and open with your doctor tell yourself "I can do this"...you are courageous to come here and be honest with us...so take it one step further and be honest with your doctor. Most doctors I know will respect your honesty and not judge you...If you can tell us, you can tell your doctor.
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Old 10-30-2019, 03:07 PM
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I drank before finding out, in fact I was hungover when I did the test as didn't feel right so thought I'd test and felt so guilty. Tell your doctor, they will most likely tell you what they told me which was in that early pregnancy it's very unlikely any harm would be done and as long as you quit now should all be fine. I wish I'd never started drinking again after, if you can just give it up. I've felt very guilty over my drinking since having the kids and this is why I've been trying to quit.
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Old 10-30-2019, 03:15 PM
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did you drink heavily (like for months) before getting pregnant, too?
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Old 10-30-2019, 03:17 PM
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I go back and forth on telling my doctor. I’ve gone over 4 weeks without a sip. What’s done is done and I can’t reverse anything. But, it would be nice to talk it out. I just feel embarrassed and ashamed.

QUOTE=teatreeoil007;7299997]Honesty is really the best policy....tell your doctor...you need to share that with him/her and he/she can help you as well as help you with your anxiety. If you're afraid to be honest and open with your doctor tell yourself "I can do this"...you are courageous to come here and be honest with us...so take it one step further and be honest with your doctor. Most doctors I know will respect your honesty and not judge you...If you can tell us, you can tell your doctor.[/QUOTE]
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Old 10-30-2019, 03:29 PM
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Years of binge drinking, I was aged 37 pregnant so been binge drinking for twenty years. Worry is normal though, I was a nervous wreck. I was probably drunk repeatedly in those first weeks before finding out, two bottles of wine I'd drink easily. Baby was absolutely fine, still wish I hadn't done it but I wasn't expecting to fall pregnant and I can't turn the clock back. If you've had scans, usually around twelve weeks and everything looks fine then go easy on yourself. Your doctor will be understanding so definitely worth speaking to them.
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Old 10-30-2019, 03:40 PM
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@longlady thank you so much for your reply. Can I ask you often you were binging? Once a week? A couple times a week? Did you drink every day? Just trying to find hope and comfort in others stories while I try to muster up the courage to talk to my doctor.

Originally Posted by Longlady View Post
Years of binge drinking, I was aged 37 pregnant so been binge drinking for twenty years. Worry is normal though, I was a nervous wreck. I was probably drunk repeatedly in those first weeks before finding out, two bottles of wine I'd drink easily. Baby was absolutely fine, still wish I hadn't done it but I wasn't expecting to fall pregnant and I can't turn the clock back. If you've had scans, usually around twelve weeks and everything looks fine then go easy on yourself. Your doctor will be understanding so definitely worth speaking to them.
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Old 10-30-2019, 03:50 PM
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GeorgiaMarie, my understanding is that it's different for everyone. Alcohol during pregnancy would affect people differently. Try to relax and focus on taking care of yourself.
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Old 10-30-2019, 03:54 PM
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Originally Posted by GeorgiaMarie85 View Post
I go back and forth on telling my doctor. I’ve gone over 4 weeks without a sip. What’s done is done and I can’t reverse anything. But, it would be nice to talk it out. I just feel embarrassed and ashamed.


Hi there. Well, I think it says a LOT that you came here today and reached out to a public forum like this....sometimes that's easier than face to face confessions. You can continue "talking it out here" ....there's lots of caring and understanding people here. Also, I think there are many women who drank before they knew about a pregnancy and then didn't touch a drop after finding out they were pregnant. You are SO not alone in this....that happened to me too! I did worry, but I did talk to my doctor about it too.

I know how it feels to be embarassed, ashamed, and apprehensive...but you know what? You can do it; and it's a good way to practice assertiveness about expressing your needs. You need to talk about it, right? You need some reassurance, right? You are going to be a mother, so you're going to find out all about speaking up for you and your child. You can do this!

And good job on not touching a drop for as long as you have so far. That rocks! Hang in there Georgia.
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Old 10-30-2019, 03:56 PM
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Yes, I agree with Anna, there is no hard and fast answer here.

I would hope you would discuss this with your Doctor for a few reasons. One, she can advise you and put your mind at ease.

Secondly there may be additional supplements she can suggest for you or blood tests she might want to do.

Thirdly, if you are struggling with not drinking after the baby arrives, you have a confidant, someone who can put you in contact with services that can help you.

I know you want what is best for your baby so fess up and get the best care you can.

In the meantime, worrying will not help one bit, so just keep taking good care of yourself.
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Old 10-30-2019, 03:58 PM
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Georgia,

We've all done things we regret....every time I regretted something I've to take a step by step approach until I somehow reconciled it .... processed the emotions ... etc, etc.... there are still things that happened long ago that I regret and every year on the anniversary of it I go through a funk...but I really do believe it helps to reach out.
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Old 10-30-2019, 04:01 PM
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Hi again GeorgiaMarie
I would definitely tell your Dr. They can run all manner of tests just to be sure - the likelihood is the outcome will be to reassure you bub is fine

D
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Old 10-30-2019, 04:46 PM
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I was a very heavy drinker when I found out I was pregnant with my son. I was 6 weeks along when I found out. I actually took the pregnancy test whilst drunk. Not something I’m proud to admit.

I quit drinking right when I found out. That was the best thing I could do for my son.

Unfortunately, I took up drinking again after he was born. That’s something that I regret and if I could turn back time, I would go back to that first drink and never take it!

Hang in there. Talk to you dr. Take care of yourself and your baby, s/he will be here before you know it!
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Old 10-31-2019, 07:29 AM
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Originally Posted by Atlast9999 View Post
I was a very heavy drinker when I found out I was pregnant with my son. I was 6 weeks along when I found out. I actually took the pregnancy test whilst drunk. Not something I’m proud to admit.

I quit drinking right when I found out. That was the best thing I could do for my son.

Unfortunately, I took up drinking again after he was born. That’s something that I regret and if I could turn back time, I would go back to that first drink and never take it!

Hang in there. Talk to you dr. Take care of yourself and your baby, s/he will be here before you know it!
Thank you for your response! Can I ask how much you were drinking? My husband and I have had many conversations regarding the amount I drank before and how I don’t want to go back to it. He’s very supportive.
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Old 10-31-2019, 08:27 AM
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Georgia, I think you will find that alcoholism is not so much about the amount you drink or even how often you drink. It's more about what happens to you when you drink and the fact that you can't stop. I became a horrible person when I drank and I'm glad to have moved beyond that.
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Old 10-31-2019, 08:56 AM
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Georgia, please don’t keep stressing over the amounts you drank, and the amounts other people drank and then delivered healthy babies, to use a gauge.

So, if you speak to your doctor, you may find that s/he puts your mind at rest, or runs tests that will put your mind at rest. Baby and Mum need a life as stress free as possible. Congratulations on your good news!
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Old 10-31-2019, 02:34 PM
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I agree with Tatsy....reduce stress as much as possible....being able to go to your Dr. especially your OB Dr. about personal/confidential matters should be part of why you chose that Dr. But, he/she cannot help you if you don't open up. Again, he/she are humans too and maybe have kids, so can relate to becoming a parent...remember your Dr. is a human, not a superhero and they will respect you for being honest. It really benefits you, though, in just being able to get the burden and worry partially off your own shoulders. A lot of women in the childbearing age do drink or go out and party and they may have been partying when they got pregnant. So, I don't think it's as rare as you may think it is.
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