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To Scared to drink and too scared not to

Old 10-11-2019, 03:49 AM
  # 21 (permalink)  
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Dear Sweeti, I’m so saddened to read this new thread. I’ve wracked my brain trying to think of a new string of words that might motivate you to seek assistance. But I can do no more than repeat my initial post in your last thread. Although a welfare-check, would be great, in place of calling an ambulance.

“Sweeti, from what you’ve posted this year, you are in a fight for your health, if not your life. You can win that fight, with your AV, but to do so requires action, positive action. To drink, to lessen withdrawals, will perpetuate the drink, withdraw, few days sober, drink, withdraw, few days sober “cycle”.

Sweeti, you must take action, to break out of that cycle, to break free, towards a better life than the one you’re now trapped in. The trouble is, when I was trapped, I couldn’t fully see it, because the alcohol clouded the “real me” and my proper, rational, thinking.

To drink, is akin to pouring gasoline on a fire, that the gasoline caused. Please phone for an ambulance, you deserve to be safe, and ultimately, well.


Nothing changes, if nothing changes, Sweeti, please seek help in the 3D world, SR will still be here for you too. As always, rooting for you x.
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Old 10-11-2019, 04:55 AM
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((Mera and Daisy))...sounds horrific and is a real reminder of how progressive alcoholism is and where it can and will take us. I am so so glad you are both alive and sober and here.

Sweetie, please heed both these ladies words. X x
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Old 10-11-2019, 05:22 AM
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Sweeti, I'm sorry you're not ready to take care of yourself, yet. And, 'yet' is a very frightening word. I do hope you keep posting and let us know how you're doing. We are here for you.

Mera, I've sent you a PM.
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Old 10-11-2019, 06:42 AM
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Sweeti, please read mera & daisy’s posts again and again. They both came very close to dying which is far worse than being in a nursing home or wheelchair bound. You still have a chance to restore your health if you act now. You can make those calls and get some help. No one cares that your house is messy. If you call for a welfare check all they will see is you.
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Old 10-11-2019, 07:03 AM
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Mera and Daisy, I am so sorry that happened to both of you. Thank you for sharing your stories. Sending lots of love and strength for both of you in your recovery.
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Old 10-11-2019, 07:05 AM
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Sweeti,

I’m glad you’re here and posting. I really hope you decide to take action this time. You are the only one who can help you get sober, but you have lots of people who will support you in that journey.
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Old 10-11-2019, 07:55 AM
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Daisy, I'm so glad that your daughter came by when she did and that you're okay.
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Old 10-11-2019, 08:16 AM
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Daisy, I’m so glad your daughter found you and you survived.
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Old 10-11-2019, 08:44 AM
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Originally Posted by Sweetichick2 View Post
To Scared to drink and too scared not to
That was me.

I know that place all too well. It is still fresh in memory and seems like yesterday, even though I have been in recovery for 16 years. I am grateful it is still fresh because that keeps me grateful for the life I have today.

I was found by loved ones in a fetal position on the floor unable to respond to the needs of life. Later on, I had a seizure from acute alcohol withdrawal which could have been fatal if I hadn't received immediate medical attention, but my wife (an ER nurse) was with me when it happened and an ambulance was called.

I am here for you. I will and do listen to your shares. I don't respond much, because I don't know what to say, other than I am here for you and know the hell of where you are.

You are not alone There are people here that are rooting for you.
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Old 10-11-2019, 01:04 PM
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Originally Posted by Sweetichick2 View Post
If necessary I will call the mental health line and get awelfare check. I don't want to get myself locked in a psych ward over a few withdrawal. I decided to pre-order my groceries for a week. And then grow up get through them go back to AA and really start pounding the AV. I have no choice or mental health will take over and drug me to death

sweeti, your drugging yourself to death as is.
IF youre serious, the go back to AA will have an exact date on it- like today.
choose TODAY. it wont kill you like the alcohol and valium are killing you.
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Old 10-11-2019, 02:26 PM
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Sweeti, it IS necessary. If you wait until you feel it's absolutely necessary, you won't be able to make the call. Please call someone, anyone to help you.
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Old 10-11-2019, 02:55 PM
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Praying you will get the help you need to save your life, Sweeti.
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Old 10-11-2019, 03:50 PM
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Thank you for sharing your story as well Daisy.

I hope you'll check in again today Sweetichick.

D
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Old 10-11-2019, 04:56 PM
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Originally Posted by Sweetichick2 View Post
My mum has finished chemo and everything looks good. Thanks for asking.
Glad she's doing better. How upset would you be if she ignored the doctors advice and decided to not seek treatment for her disease?
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Old 10-11-2019, 05:20 PM
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I'm feeling much better today. Thanks for the support. It's great to know I am not al9ne. I think I was just suffering from a major anxiety attack along with paranoia. Mera and Daisy thanks so much for your stories but sorry you had to go through it. Thanks for all the other replies. They were really helpful.
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Old 10-11-2019, 05:22 PM
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Sweeti, wishing you the strength to work yourself out of this hell hole and on to some real healing. Sending you my best for your walk towards recovery. You are so worth it. Please reach out for help. So many care about you.
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Old 10-11-2019, 05:25 PM
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Originally Posted by nez View Post
That was me.

I know that place all too well. It is still fresh in memory and seems like yesterday, even though I have been in recovery for 16 years. I am grateful it is still fresh because that keeps me grateful for the life I have today.

I was found by loved ones in a fetal position on the floor unable to respond to the needs of life. Later on, I had a seizure from acute alcohol withdrawal which could have been fatal if I hadn't received immediate medical attention, but my wife (an ER nurse) was with me when it happened and an ambulance was called.

I am here for you. I will and do listen to your shares. I don't respond much, because I don't know what to say, other than I am here for you and know the hell of where you are.

You are not alone There are people here that are rooting for you.
Nez sorry you had to go through that . lucky your w8fe is a nurse. Thanks for telling me I am not alone,
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Old 10-11-2019, 05:34 PM
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I'm feeling much better today. Thanks for the support. It's great to know I am not al9ne. I think I was just suffering from a major anxiety attack along with paranoia. Mera and Daisy thanks so much for your stories but sorry you had to go through it. Thanks for all the other replies. They were really helpful.
So, does that mean you aren't going to "go back to AA and really start pounding the AV?"
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Old 10-11-2019, 05:48 PM
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Originally Posted by Sweetichick2 View Post
Nez sorry you had to go through that .
Sweetichick2, strange as it might sound, I am glad I went through that because that was the only way I was going to get to where I am today. It took a trip to hell to make me change and know the serenity of today. I had to go through it without turning back or side stepping, in order to get to the other side. No regrets for me, only gratitude. Gratitude for knowing what a gift recovery is because I have experienced hell first hand.

Sweetichick2, I am rooting for you with all my heart. I don't want anybody to be stuck where I was. Recovery is doable and a miracle that only gets better.
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Old 10-11-2019, 05:55 PM
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I'm glad you feel better today sweetichick.

A couple of people have already alluded to the fact that this shouldn't stop you from taking your situation seriously.

I know I rationalised many many times that I must have just been 'having a bad day' and 'overreacted'.

Pretty soon after that I'd drink again.

If I'd taken my situation seriously and gotten help then I may not have ended up with so many health problems now,

I'm glad you're feeling better - that's a sign that things are probably not permanent yet - but I think it's still time to call in outside help?

D
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