What I’ve become after booze - Weekenders 06 - 09 September 2019
Member
Join Date: Jan 2015
Location: London, England
Posts: 7,059
My first drink and drunk was at 13. My friend and I pinched vodka from her parents cabinet. She tried and didn't like it. I drank and passed out, my Dad had to be called and I in a whole lot of trouble.
All though opportunity's were limited due to my age I got drunk whenever I could.
By the age of 18 I had been blackout drunk so many times that I thought it was normal. I actually believed that was what you strive for and that others were having the same experiences. No blackout no fun.
Wake up calls came and were ignored. things got worse. I got myself in terrible situations. Bad things kept happening. I was getting a terrible reputation. The authentic me was a painfully shy insecure girl. The drunk me was a vamp to say the least.
I knew I couldn't stop drinking. I even seriously considered becoming a Nun as I thought I would be away from temptation, safe and cosseted, something I had never received at home.
Up until last year at the age of 55 I had a lifetime of getting drunk. Eventually over the years I went from a party binge drinker to a all day everyday pass out drinker.
I can totally relate to this that Phoenix said.
I find that 'I feel good after one drink, so much more MUST be brilliant!' feeling still gets to me- with sugary stuff. Shows I have to be vigilant always- that addictive personality trait is not just booze.
I could and do get addicted to anything and everything.
All though opportunity's were limited due to my age I got drunk whenever I could.
By the age of 18 I had been blackout drunk so many times that I thought it was normal. I actually believed that was what you strive for and that others were having the same experiences. No blackout no fun.
Wake up calls came and were ignored. things got worse. I got myself in terrible situations. Bad things kept happening. I was getting a terrible reputation. The authentic me was a painfully shy insecure girl. The drunk me was a vamp to say the least.
I knew I couldn't stop drinking. I even seriously considered becoming a Nun as I thought I would be away from temptation, safe and cosseted, something I had never received at home.
Up until last year at the age of 55 I had a lifetime of getting drunk. Eventually over the years I went from a party binge drinker to a all day everyday pass out drinker.
I can totally relate to this that Phoenix said.
I find that 'I feel good after one drink, so much more MUST be brilliant!' feeling still gets to me- with sugary stuff. Shows I have to be vigilant always- that addictive personality trait is not just booze.
I could and do get addicted to anything and everything.
Ocean Lover!
Join Date: Apr 2018
Location: You know nothing Jon Snow - UK
Posts: 2,604
Morning lovely weekenders old and new 
I feel honoured to be quoted, thanks Mags. It’s hard to believe that I used to regularly get in the car to drive drunk, only ever to get more drink though. In my warped mind I would never go say, to the supermarket or anywhere else in the car when I had been drinking because I was well aware I shouldn’t drive. But I had no problem getting in the car drunk to purchase more alcohol, madness!
Max the kittens new toys are live mice. Alfie the older boy cat started bringing Max dead ones to play with, then stage 2 of “teach my brofur how to hunt and kill” started at the weekend where Alfie is bringing Max live mice. Yesterday morning I found Max crunching on a mouse with entrails all over my cream carpets. I hope this stage passes quickly lol.
Back to my old type of work again, can feel the anxiety building and very tired as long commutes and long days. It’s building back up the savings though and I am trying to keep on top of self care / boundaries and all that good recovery stuff but it is a challenge.
Getting a brand new kitchen fitted in the next month! so excited as been in this house 9 years with a temporary kitchen and it’s the last room in the house to be done.
Have a good day people xx
I feel honoured to be quoted, thanks Mags. It’s hard to believe that I used to regularly get in the car to drive drunk, only ever to get more drink though. In my warped mind I would never go say, to the supermarket or anywhere else in the car when I had been drinking because I was well aware I shouldn’t drive. But I had no problem getting in the car drunk to purchase more alcohol, madness!
Max the kittens new toys are live mice. Alfie the older boy cat started bringing Max dead ones to play with, then stage 2 of “teach my brofur how to hunt and kill” started at the weekend where Alfie is bringing Max live mice. Yesterday morning I found Max crunching on a mouse with entrails all over my cream carpets. I hope this stage passes quickly lol.
Back to my old type of work again, can feel the anxiety building and very tired as long commutes and long days. It’s building back up the savings though and I am trying to keep on top of self care / boundaries and all that good recovery stuff but it is a challenge.
Getting a brand new kitchen fitted in the next month! so excited as been in this house 9 years with a temporary kitchen and it’s the last room in the house to be done.
Have a good day people xx
saoutchik
Join Date: Jan 2015
Location: London
Posts: 16,201
Originally Posted by PhoenixJ 
Led Zep -Ramble on, Black Dog, Evernight...brill driving music..
I find that 'I feel good after one drink, so much more MUST be brilliant!' feeling still gets to me- with sugary stuff. Shows I have to be vigilant always- that addictive personality trait is not just booze.
I find that 'I feel good after one drink, so much more MUST be brilliant!' feeling still gets to me- with sugary stuff. Shows I have to be vigilant always- that addictive personality trait is not just booze.
I am the same.
In my thirties, because of having young kids I considered that I moderated but really all I did was drank far less often, when I did drink it was still to excess.
Magsie
Thread Starter
Join Date: Oct 2013
Location: UK
Posts: 26,666
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