1st Day sober
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Aug 2019
Posts: 21
1st Day sober
Hey guys I'm glad to have found this. I have been drinking about 5 nights a week in the past couple years. I want to be sober I'm tired of saying things to my wife I don't mean and getting in trouble. I know I have a drinking problem just not sure if I'm an alcoholic?? I'm guessing I am but I guess whatever I am is not who I want to be. My family and I have had a rough past 4 months as our house burned to the ground and we lost everything. We are in a rental house now in a nice neighborhood. Last night we got in an argument over something very petty. We were both drinking and apparently someone called the cops because someone heard noise. We love the little cultisac we are on its all older people and they are super nice. We are both completely embarrassed and it was the last straw for me. Fortunately they didn't give us a ticket and I'm hoping and praying we don't get one. I know I can quit drinking. Back in 2006 I got a 2nd DUI and my daughter was just born. I quit drinking for almost 8 and a half years. Any help would be appreciated!!
Last edited by cuezncars; 08-25-2019 at 01:24 PM. Reason: mispelling
Administrator
Join Date: Aug 2003
Location: Dancing in the Light
Posts: 61,474
Welcome, I'm sorry to hear about the fire in your home. I'm glad you've decided to stop drinking. What kind of program/support did you use when you were sober for 8 1/2 years in the past? It's always a good idea to have a plan for what you will do during the times you'd normally be drinking, and for times when you are stressed or upset.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Aug 2019
Posts: 21
Thank you Anna! When I quit for 8 1/2 yrs I did it cold Turkey with no help just my family. I dont have a plan yet but to start working out and working on my race cars as I've gotten away from it. The first couple days and weeks will be toughest for me. I know I can do this I need to stay on here every day though. Any ideas I'm open to!
Blue Belt
Join Date: Jul 2015
Location: Soberville, USA
Posts: 4,174
The crave calls to me still. I seem to forget all the hell i went through getting this clean.
I sleep like a baby sometimes and exercise like i haven't since i was in my early twenties.
AA works steps and gratitude. I think more and more about going there again. The main thing is seeing or in my case now reading about folks going through the hell of addiction.
Unless i keep it fresh in my mind i wants to fade away.
I typically crave, when i crave, around 3 to 6 pm. It doesn't matter if i had a bad or good day. I drank to deal with both.
I am craving now. Why? Because my life is going swell. So, i want to have my cake and eat it too.
But i won't drink. I will go to bed around 9 or 10 and say a prayer thankful i am still a non drinker. This is my sober life.
It will never change unless it decides to change. I can't make it better. It just will happen.
Hope thos helps in some way.
Thanks.
I sleep like a baby sometimes and exercise like i haven't since i was in my early twenties.
AA works steps and gratitude. I think more and more about going there again. The main thing is seeing or in my case now reading about folks going through the hell of addiction.
Unless i keep it fresh in my mind i wants to fade away.
I typically crave, when i crave, around 3 to 6 pm. It doesn't matter if i had a bad or good day. I drank to deal with both.
I am craving now. Why? Because my life is going swell. So, i want to have my cake and eat it too.
But i won't drink. I will go to bed around 9 or 10 and say a prayer thankful i am still a non drinker. This is my sober life.
It will never change unless it decides to change. I can't make it better. It just will happen.
Hope thos helps in some way.
Thanks.
Community Greeter
Join Date: Aug 2007
Location: Upstate New York
Posts: 51,531
It's great to meet you, cuezncars - welcome! SR helped me quit and stay quit - it was so good to not feel alone anymore.
That's what happened to me, too - drinking caused me to become argumentative & confrontational. That's the exact opposite of my real personality. It was changing me & causing chaos in my life. I was becoming dependent on it, & never knew what would happen once it was in my system. It feels so good to be free of it. Post and read here often - we are here to help, and we truly understand.
That's what happened to me, too - drinking caused me to become argumentative & confrontational. That's the exact opposite of my real personality. It was changing me & causing chaos in my life. I was becoming dependent on it, & never knew what would happen once it was in my system. It feels so good to be free of it. Post and read here often - we are here to help, and we truly understand.
Member
Join Date: May 2010
Posts: 453
Sorry about your losing your house in a fire. That must be so difficult.
People are different, so my question to think about would be why did you go back to drinking?
Did you think you could control it? Some people are able to stay quit by simply accepting that trying to control drinking isn't feasible or worthwhile.
Were you romanticizing the idea of drinking? Maybe try to remember why you quit.
For me, I couldn't control my drinking, but I couldn't stay away from it either. I had to get a lot of help to change enough to where I could stay away. I used online support and also went to AA (including doing the steps with a sponsor).
Whatever path you take, I wish you success in staying sober. Alcohol creates a lot of problems and there's freedom in never having to worry about drinking again.
Best wishes to you.
People are different, so my question to think about would be why did you go back to drinking?
Did you think you could control it? Some people are able to stay quit by simply accepting that trying to control drinking isn't feasible or worthwhile.
Were you romanticizing the idea of drinking? Maybe try to remember why you quit.
For me, I couldn't control my drinking, but I couldn't stay away from it either. I had to get a lot of help to change enough to where I could stay away. I used online support and also went to AA (including doing the steps with a sponsor).
Whatever path you take, I wish you success in staying sober. Alcohol creates a lot of problems and there's freedom in never having to worry about drinking again.
Best wishes to you.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Aug 2019
Posts: 21
Guys and gals thanks so much for your support and help!!! I feel so much better after getting on here today. Tomorrow evening will be tough but I have to change. If I dont I'm going to end up in jail or worse. After the 8.5 yrs of not drinking I gave in and did a shot with my ex and her family at a holiday event. I didn't even want to do it I fell into the peer pressure. Anyways I miss those sober years and I'm looking forward to feeling like my normal self again!!
Administrator
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,378
Welcome aboard cuezncars
I'm sorry for the fire - I can only imagine how that feels.
I stopped drinking 12 years ago - one of the best things about being sober was reconnecting with the real me again. I no longer feel ashamed to look myself in the eyes in the mirror.
SR helped me turn my life around - I know we can help you too
D
I'm sorry for the fire - I can only imagine how that feels.
I stopped drinking 12 years ago - one of the best things about being sober was reconnecting with the real me again. I no longer feel ashamed to look myself in the eyes in the mirror.
SR helped me turn my life around - I know we can help you too
D
Member
Join Date: May 2010
Posts: 453
Originally Posted by cuezncars 
Guys and gals thanks so much for your support and help!!! I feel so much better after getting on here today. Tomorrow evening will be tough but I have to change. If I dont I'm going to end up in jail or worse. After the 8.5 yrs of not drinking I gave in and did a shot with my ex and her family at a holiday event. I didn't even want to do it I fell into the peer pressure. Anyways I miss those sober years and I'm looking forward to feeling like my normal self again!!
One thing that helped me was just to accept that I'm a non-drinker. (I'm definitely alcoholic, but I don't talk about it outside of recovery circles and lots of people don't drink for many reasons.)
If people offer me a drink, I smile and say no thanks. I think just being clear with that for yourself will make it easier not to get caught up in it again.
Hope you feel normal again soon!
Member
Join Date: Jan 2011
Location: Warwick RI
Posts: 1,276
Wow the house fire is devastating I'm sure...and it sounds like you guys are in a nice place now...except for your drinking and arguing...
You did sober for 8 years....so did I...
You know you can do this....its just a "timing" and "readiness" issue.
I know I have felt ready but truly wasn't ready which I found out by stopping and being unable to stay stopped.
If you don't "try" to stop you won't know if you can or not....I would pick a date...and give it your best....As we know drinking isn't going to help the arguing situation or any situation.
I wish you well.
You did sober for 8 years....so did I...
You know you can do this....its just a "timing" and "readiness" issue.
I know I have felt ready but truly wasn't ready which I found out by stopping and being unable to stay stopped.
If you don't "try" to stop you won't know if you can or not....I would pick a date...and give it your best....As we know drinking isn't going to help the arguing situation or any situation.
I wish you well.
Member
Join Date: Mar 2019
Posts: 519
All I can say is welcome and you are in the right place.
I have been using SR for longer than I have been seriously sober, and when I finally had enough and got there, I became a more active "family" member here! I also attend AA meetings everyday, and pray and meditate and do the work, thos things have helped me stay sober.
Keep coming back, and proud of you for taking these steps!!!
I have been using SR for longer than I have been seriously sober, and when I finally had enough and got there, I became a more active "family" member here! I also attend AA meetings everyday, and pray and meditate and do the work, thos things have helped me stay sober.
Keep coming back, and proud of you for taking these steps!!!
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