It’s officially da
Member
Join Date: Jan 2011
Location: Warwick RI
Posts: 1,276
Eating will help you everytime! I was the same way drinking...never ate...
So in this sobriety if I find myself putting off eating..I notice that I get edgy...and the thought of a drink CAN easily pop in.
As soon as I eat...I feel 100% better. I am also glad you are doing well and staying sober.
So in this sobriety if I find myself putting off eating..I notice that I get edgy...and the thought of a drink CAN easily pop in.
As soon as I eat...I feel 100% better. I am also glad you are doing well and staying sober.
Member
Join Date: Aug 2018
Posts: 1,278
Hi Sweeti, how are you doing? Still early morning here.
Today is pay day, isn't it? I think I speak for many when I say we are holding thumbs for you today - sending you good vibes and prayers and strength - hoping that you manage to be as strong as you've been this whole week , and not buy any liquor.
I know you can do this . Sending you lots of love , you are in my thoughts all the time ((()))
Today is pay day, isn't it? I think I speak for many when I say we are holding thumbs for you today - sending you good vibes and prayers and strength - hoping that you manage to be as strong as you've been this whole week , and not buy any liquor.
I know you can do this . Sending you lots of love , you are in my thoughts all the time ((()))
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jul 2019
Posts: 143
I stuffed up last night at 20 to 10.. went to the drive through just before it shut. Had two drinks and promptly fell asleep. Of coarse I had 10 drinks this morning. Finished off the bottle. I rang my old sponsor yesterday but didn’t even get to talk. She was meant to ring me back at teatime. She had a high rock bottom. Today I have just been watching Netflix and talked to my psychiatrist. I didn’t realise this would be so hard.
Member
Join Date: Apr 2019
Posts: 412
Maybe you don't really want to quit given that every pay day it is the same thing over and over. I was the same way for a long time and nothing changed till i actually wanted it. I was sick of the consequences and it destroying my life but still wanted to drink. Not to sound harsh but does not seem like you are ready to quit
Member
Join Date: Apr 2019
Posts: 412
Originally Posted by sweetichick1 
I stuffed up last night at 20 to 10.. went to the drive through just before it shut. Had two drinks and promptly fell asleep. Of coarse I had 10 drinks this morning. Finished off the bottle. I rang my old sponsor yesterday but didn’t even get to talk. She was meant to ring me back at teatime. She had a high rock bottom. Today I have just been watching Netflix and talked to my psychiatrist. I didn’t realise this would be so hard.
Ocean Lover!
Join Date: Apr 2018
Location: You know nothing Jon Snow - UK
Posts: 2,604
Originally Posted by sweetichick1
I’m actually on day 9. Payday was 3 days ago.
If today would have been Day 9, but you drank the night before you drank on what would have been your Day 8. That means you only actually had 7 days sober before picking up again. You lasted 1 day alcohol free from payday and drank the next day. I don’t say that to be mean, more that you have to face facts and be honest with yourself about what is going on and what you are doing.
I don’t think saying “I stuffed up” is helping you, how about saying “I chose to quit recovery again”.
not a greeter
Join Date: Nov 2006
Location: padmasana
Posts: 13,927
Originally Posted by sweetichick1
I stuffed up last night at 20 to 10.. went to the drive through just before it shut. Had two drinks and promptly fell asleep. Of coarse I had 10 drinks this morning. Finished off the bottle. I rang my old sponsor yesterday but didn’t even get to talk. She was meant to ring me back at teatime. She had a high rock bottom. Today I have just been watching Netflix and talked to my psychiatrist. I didn’t realise this would be so hard.
Originally Posted by sweetichick1
I’m actually on day 9. Payday was 3 days ago.
* it’s evening where you are. Get off your lounge and go to a meeting!
Member
Join Date: Sep 2011
Location: USA
Posts: 690
Oh no.....I don't understand...you say you always have a hard time around pay day? Do you have a job? How do you get paid? I know here in US if you don't have a job you don't get paid . If you are getting paid can't you pay for rehab?Sweeti...I want the best for you but what you are doing in not working. I really think if you go through rehab...if possible a 30 day program. After that you can get a part time job something simple like bagging groceries . You will need to be responsible for something You will need to show up. . You will show up and be surrounded by others, make new friends and have a few extra dollars and most importantly feel productive. I am not saying it will be easy but you can do this! Right now it just seems as you stay home all day and watch movies. I think that would make me drink too. I really think now you have nothing to be held accountable for. You are too isolated. Just my thoughts and wanting the best for you.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jul 2019
Posts: 143
I think I was triggered by my old sponsor. Not an excuse but when you reach out for help from Aa it doesn’t feel good. She got sober by feeding her kids packaged meals. The last time I went to her house at night there were cockroaches running everywhere and I mean everywhere. She is very strict and last time I spent two nights in hospital with chest pains. I had a stress test and I am okay. I need to give up on her and stop looking for support from her. Tomorrow will be drink free. Another fresh start. I am feeling much better now I am eating nutritious. Thanks for all the help guys.
Ocean Lover!
Join Date: Apr 2018
Location: You know nothing Jon Snow - UK
Posts: 2,604
What she feeds her kids is absolutely none of your business. The state of her house is absolutely none of your business. The fact that your bad mouthing her here might be part of the reason why she didn’t answer your call. Sober people can be very astute and she probably has picked up on the vibe that you look down on her. Why should she help you when you talk about her like this, judging her and putting her down. She has to protect her sobriety too as do all of us, it’s unhealthy to have a toxic person in your life that bad mouths you behind your back, we have to cut off those people to save ourselves. Maybe that is why she doesn’t answer your calls, to protect herself.
The only important thing and the only thing that matters here is she’s sober, and you’re not.
The only important thing and the only thing that matters here is she’s sober, and you’re not.
Member
Join Date: Apr 2012
Location: northern michigan. not the U.P.
Posts: 15,281
Originally Posted by sweetichick1
I think I was triggered by my old sponsor. Not an excuse but when you reach out for help from Aa it doesn’t feel good. .
youre old sponsor didnt put a drink in your hand and tilt your elbow- you did that all on your own.
you drank because of untreated alcoholism STILL. remember that accountability thread? THAT is what there isnt any of. theres a crapton of "i SHOULD" "i COULD" "MAYBE " but no 'i WILL."
too much every day life things-eating well,watching tv, buying a gift,etc- that have absolutely nothing to do with recovery. they are every day life things billions of people do every day.
and not enough recovery focus.
sweeti, youre going to excuse yourself right into the grave. excuses why no rehab, cant go to meetings, cant_______________- fill in the blank. theres been a crapton of CANT.
3 years now and nothings changed for the better
thats what happens with no accountability.
now myself and others will say get accountable, then youll say your right. then youll say i should i could i would then drama and chaos then ya drink then er then blame mental disorders or_____________________
its the cycle,sweeti- one that can be stopped with accountability for recovery.
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