Regret & Remorse - Do they, will they ever go away? Weekenders 16 - 19 August 2019
Member
Join Date: Jan 2007
Location: England
Posts: 674
I’m not sober, I was for a while, but the first post in this thread hit home to me, I’m not sure I can forgive myself, it torments me everyday, my life is all one big regret. I do know it can maybe be different but don’t think I’ll ever be able to forgive myself, I don’t do anything super bad (well just the once) I don’t think I have it in me to ever forgive myself for the mess I’ve made of my life, how depressing is that lol
Member
Join Date: Sep 2014
Location: Arizona, USA
Posts: 1,598
SOOOOO MANY shameful things in my past. I still vaguely remember being on stage at a comedy club while on a date after heckling the comedian at a show. The late night calls and texts, the Facebook posts, the DUIs, the cruel and idiotic things I’d say to girlfriends. The time I passed out on the street walking home from the bar and the cops got a call about a dead body. The time I was on travel with my wife and her coworkers and I got kicked out of the bar and threw up everywhere. Or five months ago when I fought all the bouncers at a club because they cut me off. The examples are ENDLESS.
For me they are fading, but I can easily recall them. Maybe that’s not a bad thing. I have to remember what a complete jack hole I was while I was drinking so I never go back there.
For me they are fading, but I can easily recall them. Maybe that’s not a bad thing. I have to remember what a complete jack hole I was while I was drinking so I never go back there.
saoutchik
Join Date: Jan 2015
Location: London
Posts: 16,202
Congratulations on 7 days WaterOx!
Welcome to Weekenders Room1 and BeABetterMan! Forgiveness is not about absolving yourself from all the harm our drinking causes ourselves and others. As Dee says, it is about drawing a line under the past and being a better person on the sober side of that line. If you are a problem drinker/alcoholic as I am then getting sober is hard, only other people in the same position know how tough it is but the flip side is that you get a real sense of personal achievement if you can beat the condition which allows you to move on. It's a win win.
Edit: I am still an alcoholic but have 4 years 7 months + of sobriety.
Welcome to Weekenders Room1 and BeABetterMan! Forgiveness is not about absolving yourself from all the harm our drinking causes ourselves and others. As Dee says, it is about drawing a line under the past and being a better person on the sober side of that line. If you are a problem drinker/alcoholic as I am then getting sober is hard, only other people in the same position know how tough it is but the flip side is that you get a real sense of personal achievement if you can beat the condition which allows you to move on. It's a win win.
Edit: I am still an alcoholic but have 4 years 7 months + of sobriety.
Member
Join Date: Jan 2015
Location: London, England
Posts: 7,060
Happy Birthday Vman. Hope you have a great day. Heres an idea for all those excess tomatoes.
Room 1 I am sorry to are feeling so regretful. You can't change the past. Try and be kind to yourself now, get sober and make memories that you can look back on and smile.
WaterOx congrats on your fresh new week.
Have a good Sunday everyone.
Room 1 I am sorry to are feeling so regretful. You can't change the past. Try and be kind to yourself now, get sober and make memories that you can look back on and smile.
WaterOx congrats on your fresh new week.
Have a good Sunday everyone.
Mr
Join Date: Mar 2016
Location: FRANCE
Posts: 5,230
Morning all.
Hope you manage to find sobriety Room1.
I think while we are still in the grips of alcohol it's hard to imagine almost anything for ourselves.
Welcome BeABetterMan I think most everbody on here has their share of misery and heartache. Don't dwell on it exercise and make up for it.
More painting and decorating for me today. Slow work painting Michael Angelo must have been a patient man.
Later weekenders
Hope you manage to find sobriety Room1.
I think while we are still in the grips of alcohol it's hard to imagine almost anything for ourselves.
Welcome BeABetterMan I think most everbody on here has their share of misery and heartache. Don't dwell on it exercise and make up for it.
More painting and decorating for me today. Slow work painting Michael Angelo must have been a patient man.
Later weekenders
Magsie
Thread Starter
Join Date: Oct 2013
Location: UK
Posts: 26,680
Room1, I hope you can eventually leave the past behind. It does rear it’s head but using the tools we’ve picked up in sobriety can knock it on the head and like Dee said, Draw a line under it. 
Vinny, you could give it a go, think of all the visitors you’d have wanting a glimpse of your ceiling and walls.
Have a good birthday, you may uncover a masterpiece!
Kaily, great photos I’m pleased you got yourself by the sea, it always works for me too.
Bim craft canoers/kayaks, can’t blame them getting a ride up!
Vinny, you could give it a go, think of all the visitors you’d have wanting a glimpse of your ceiling and walls.
Have a good birthday, you may uncover a masterpiece!
Kaily, great photos I’m pleased you got yourself by the sea, it always works for me too.
Bim craft canoers/kayaks, can’t blame them getting a ride up!
Last edited by Mags1; 08-18-2019 at 03:51 AM. Reason: Spelling. Predictive text !
Member
Join Date: Oct 2016
Location: South Africa
Posts: 1,536
Happy B-day Vman! Lovely tomatoes those are. How do get the birds to stay away, or are you protecting your precious crop with nets? I see lots of comforting pasta/flavorful saucy dishes coming up.
Lovely pics Kaily, that harbour seal really enjoyed posing for you.
Bet you enjoyed that shower Sao.
Please stick around Room1, even if you are still drinking. Being here might help you get into the right mindset to enable you to quit.
So the rugby was a lot of fun last night, although the match itself wasn’t the most clinical affair in terms of execution on both sides. Near us were a group of spectators that I was just hoping the international media cameras would give a miss. They were in the grandstand drinking Jägermeister, Tequila etc straight from the bottle and acting somewhat like typical drunks. On the way out we had to negotiate an area near the stairs where someone had clearly been overcome by severe and uncontrollable nausea. I was grateful not to be a part of the scene but on the other hand, the thought of *I was never that bad* did occur to me...
Wishing everyone a restful Sunday.
Lovely pics Kaily, that harbour seal really enjoyed posing for you.
Bet you enjoyed that shower Sao.
Please stick around Room1, even if you are still drinking. Being here might help you get into the right mindset to enable you to quit.
So the rugby was a lot of fun last night, although the match itself wasn’t the most clinical affair in terms of execution on both sides. Near us were a group of spectators that I was just hoping the international media cameras would give a miss. They were in the grandstand drinking Jägermeister, Tequila etc straight from the bottle and acting somewhat like typical drunks. On the way out we had to negotiate an area near the stairs where someone had clearly been overcome by severe and uncontrollable nausea. I was grateful not to be a part of the scene but on the other hand, the thought of *I was never that bad* did occur to me...
Wishing everyone a restful Sunday.
Member
Join Date: Jul 2013
Location: Australia
Posts: 11,351
Originally Posted by BeABetterMan 
SOOOOO MANY shameful things in my past. I still vaguely remember being on stage at a comedy club while on a date after heckling the comedian at a show. The late night calls and texts, the Facebook posts, the DUIs, the cruel and idiotic things I’d say to girlfriends. The time I passed out on the street walking home from the bar and the cops got a call about a dead body. The time I was on travel with my wife and her coworkers and I got kicked out of the bar and threw up everywhere. Or five months ago when I fought all the bouncers at a club because they cut me off. The examples are ENDLESS.
For me they are fading, but I can easily recall them. Maybe that’s not a bad thing. I have to remember what a complete jack hole I was while I was drinking so I never go back there.
For me they are fading, but I can easily recall them. Maybe that’s not a bad thing. I have to remember what a complete jack hole I was while I was drinking so I never go back there.
Different ones but not so gracious memories all the same.
I think we need not eradicate all these and remind ourselves why we are here in SR. We don’t EVER want to be that dick again. I know I don’t.
I really appreciate you posting this because it forces me to ponder on my cringeworthy antics whilst pissed. Sigh......I’m cringing at the thought even now.
BeABM
I bet you like yourself a lot more too when you are not drinking and are the real you.
Mannnn I never want to go back to being that girl.
Xxxx
Member
Join Date: Mar 2014
Posts: 25,373
Room1, I truly hope for you today that you can put down the drink once and for all. All the bad things fade into the background once you give sobriety some time. When I drank I had no control over the constant negative thoughts and that is reason enough to Never have another drink. Welcome to the thread, stick around.
WaterOx, huge congrats on your Week. I remember saying at an AA meeting, "A Week! Seven Days! In a row!!" Keep it going. It gets better.
PJ's thread is awesome.
Sober Sunday morning, prayers for anyone still suffering in the chains of addiction. There is a way out.
(This is a Christian music video about grace, so you've been warned!!)
WaterOx, huge congrats on your Week. I remember saying at an AA meeting, "A Week! Seven Days! In a row!!" Keep it going. It gets better.
PJ's thread is awesome.
Sober Sunday morning, prayers for anyone still suffering in the chains of addiction. There is a way out.
(This is a Christian music video about grace, so you've been warned!!)
Mr
Join Date: Mar 2016
Location: FRANCE
Posts: 5,230
Originally Posted by Mags1
....
Vinny, you could give it a go, think of all the visitors you’d have wanting a glimpse of your ceiling and walls.
!
However some great art to be found elsewhere on the forums...!
See you all later
saoutchik
Join Date: Jan 2015
Location: London
Posts: 16,202
Captain, I hope those drunken supporters didn't spoil it for you.
Great to see you on WeekendersSnoozyQ!
PJ, I have posted in your thread. You're awesome (and I hardly ever use the word awesome)
Happy Birthday once again VMan, another painting man.
Mrs vman wanted white so I let her have her way.
Pope Jullius II "Michaelangelo, have you STILL not finished that ceiling? It was weeks ago when I asked you to give it a single coat of beige emulsion."
Michelangelo "Um...."
Great to see you on WeekendersSnoozyQ!
PJ, I have posted in your thread. You're awesome (and I hardly ever use the word awesome)
Happy Birthday once again VMan, another painting man.
Originally Posted by theVman31
Mrs vman wanted white so I let her have her way.
Pope Jullius II "Michaelangelo, have you STILL not finished that ceiling? It was weeks ago when I asked you to give it a single coat of beige emulsion."
Michelangelo "Um...."
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