AT some point you need to forgive yourself Eve or that self hatred and lack of self worth can just lead you back to drinking again.

All of us are way more than the things we did drunk or ill.

I Found getting it all out in the open and discussing and apologising helped me a lot.
But not grovelling.
I told my loved ones, I apologised - truly and deeply - but I am not going to do it every day for the rest of my life - because I needed to regain self esteem and self honour .
That, I have managed by showing them that I have changed by my actions and how I live my life now.