What Happens
Guest
Join Date: Aug 2015
Location: Atlanta
Posts: 8,674
Originally Posted by ThatWasTheOldMe 
The way I see it, I have two choices.
1. Go back to drinking and be happy when I'm drunk.
2. Stay sober and have constant suicidal / "you're a no good worthless loser" thoughts.
I've tried getting help for depression. I got more help separating money from my wallet.
I've tried just staying sober - even at 13 months I couldn't handle it. I have no friends, no family, hate my job, I'm broke because of suffocating debt.
1. Go back to drinking and be happy when I'm drunk.
2. Stay sober and have constant suicidal / "you're a no good worthless loser" thoughts.
I've tried getting help for depression. I got more help separating money from my wallet.
I've tried just staying sober - even at 13 months I couldn't handle it. I have no friends, no family, hate my job, I'm broke because of suffocating debt.
If you don't stop drinking (not just day or two like I think you are now) for real, and get all the help you can, that's the door you'll go thru.
Ocean Lover!
Join Date: Apr 2018
Location: You know nothing Jon Snow - UK
Posts: 2,604
There are many many more options but you don’t want to see them. They require you to take action, they require you to surrender to true recovery not just not drinking. If the only thing you do in recovery is stop drinking for most alcoholics nothing changes and you will continue to feel hopeless.
I absolutely understand the black dog of depression, got my own rack of t-shirts collected over the years so please take what I am saying as coming from a good place. If I pander to your”poor me” routine I am in essence enabling you and that isn’t going to help you out of this hole.
This self pity you have is going to be the death of you if you don’t do something about it. Depression is not just treated by medication, it can include CBT and DBT to change the way you think, actual action to make yourself do things out of your comfort zone, learning to be humble, ensuring you are eating the right foods to fuel your body, exercising every day. You seem to want a magic pill or someone else to be responsible for fixing you but when reality hits that you have to do 80% of the work yourself you run off and hide in your comfortable world of self pity.
Nothing changes if nothing changes xx
I absolutely understand the black dog of depression, got my own rack of t-shirts collected over the years so please take what I am saying as coming from a good place. If I pander to your”poor me” routine I am in essence enabling you and that isn’t going to help you out of this hole.
This self pity you have is going to be the death of you if you don’t do something about it. Depression is not just treated by medication, it can include CBT and DBT to change the way you think, actual action to make yourself do things out of your comfort zone, learning to be humble, ensuring you are eating the right foods to fuel your body, exercising every day. You seem to want a magic pill or someone else to be responsible for fixing you but when reality hits that you have to do 80% of the work yourself you run off and hide in your comfortable world of self pity.
Nothing changes if nothing changes xx
Administrator
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,442
hi TWTOM
Sometimes we have to see more than one person or try more than one avenue to fix something, man.
I dunno if thats fair or not - it just is.
I was depressed most of my adult life. It took me about a year to start to sort that out.
For me it took staying sober, counselling, and building a life I was happy in for me to start to clear out the negative self hating head addiction left me with.
For others, they may need meds in that mix as well.
I drank for years - it took a while to come out of that headspace.
It takes sustained effort - and a little faith.
I really hope you decide to go for it TWTOM
To me you seem like a guy with a lot to offer the world - if you let yourself
D
I've tried getting help for depression. I got more help separating money from my wallet.
I dunno if thats fair or not - it just is.
I was depressed most of my adult life. It took me about a year to start to sort that out.
For me it took staying sober, counselling, and building a life I was happy in for me to start to clear out the negative self hating head addiction left me with.
For others, they may need meds in that mix as well.
I drank for years - it took a while to come out of that headspace.
It takes sustained effort - and a little faith.
I really hope you decide to go for it TWTOM
To me you seem like a guy with a lot to offer the world - if you let yourself
D
bona fido dog-lover
Join Date: Mar 2008
Location: SF Bay area, CA
Posts: 99,780
Originally Posted by ThatWasTheOldMe
The way I see it, I have two choices.
1. Go back to drinking and be happy when I'm drunk.
2. Stay sober and have constant suicidal / "you're a no good worthless loser" thoughts.
I've tried getting help for depression. I got more help separating money from my wallet.
I've tried just staying sober - even at 13 months I couldn't handle it. I have no friends, no family, hate my job, I'm broke because of suffocating debt.
1. Go back to drinking and be happy when I'm drunk.
2. Stay sober and have constant suicidal / "you're a no good worthless loser" thoughts.
I've tried getting help for depression. I got more help separating money from my wallet.
I've tried just staying sober - even at 13 months I couldn't handle it. I have no friends, no family, hate my job, I'm broke because of suffocating debt.
I was too. You say you're depressed and suicidal when you're sober, but maybe you haven't been sober long enough to feel the benefits of it. Give yourself some serious sober time and I'll bet you'll feel better. 
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