Making a Change
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Jun 2018
Posts: 87
Making a Change
I had 10 months of time on pure willpower, and that went out the window for the better part of 1.5 months when I thought I could "moderate".
It started out okay, and quickly escalated to levels that caused me to quit in the first place.
In that 1.5 months I had 1-2 weeks of sober time, but each time just fell back into old habits.
What I realized is that what I was doing is not working so I checked into my first AA meeting. This was one of the hardest things I've ever done, if not the hardest.
I still have a hard time admitting that I'm an alcoholic and I think that's because I've never had what some might call a "rock bottom moment". What I DO know though, is that I'd rather not have one if I don't have to!
Not really looking for answers here, just sharing as I'm trying to keep my mind on the right things as I have very little sober time at this point.
Thanks everyone!
It started out okay, and quickly escalated to levels that caused me to quit in the first place.
In that 1.5 months I had 1-2 weeks of sober time, but each time just fell back into old habits.
What I realized is that what I was doing is not working so I checked into my first AA meeting. This was one of the hardest things I've ever done, if not the hardest.
I still have a hard time admitting that I'm an alcoholic and I think that's because I've never had what some might call a "rock bottom moment". What I DO know though, is that I'd rather not have one if I don't have to!
Not really looking for answers here, just sharing as I'm trying to keep my mind on the right things as I have very little sober time at this point.
Thanks everyone!
Member
Join Date: Jun 2019
Posts: 1,614
Yeah you right dont have to hit bottom everybody's bottom is different but it sounds to me like you're sick and tired of being sick and tired drop the booze man it's well worth it I promise you I got 84 days today I can't go back man I won't go back I love my new life keep coming back
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Join Date: Aug 2015
Location: US
Posts: 5,095
I'm always kind of amazed at how much I can actually put myself and others through, and not call it 'rock bottom'. For me, rock bottom is probably death.
The crap I have endured to keep drinking would shock a non addict. I just called it reality. But I was so utterly wrong. It was just addiction and it didn't want me to acknowledge that I was living a miserably low existence.
The crap I have endured to keep drinking would shock a non addict. I just called it reality. But I was so utterly wrong. It was just addiction and it didn't want me to acknowledge that I was living a miserably low existence.
Member
Join Date: Jul 2019
Posts: 710
Not sure there is a right or wrong method, apart from the wrong move of picking up an alcoholic drink. You must have done something right to stay sober 10 months. It is a great achievement. I am sure there are positive lessons you can still use from the 10 month (including that will power alone will not make it for you).
For me the method right now is fear. I know I must find other ways, since fear of going back to day 1 will not last for ever. The objective is to get to that place where I am smart enough to appreciate the freedom of living without alcohol, until I don't miss it at all, like a child.
For me the method right now is fear. I know I must find other ways, since fear of going back to day 1 will not last for ever. The objective is to get to that place where I am smart enough to appreciate the freedom of living without alcohol, until I don't miss it at all, like a child.
not a greeter
Join Date: Nov 2006
Location: padmasana
Posts: 13,927
Originally Posted by GreatInquiry7 
What I DO know though, is that I'd rather not have one if I don't have to!
Congrats on you sober time and welcome
.
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Join Date: Jan 2011
Location: Warwick RI
Posts: 1,276
Your post reminded me of how I felt back in 2005....I quit drinking for 8 years...2005-2013.
On my way to rehab that year I told the "driver" that picked me up I would do ANYTHING they told me to EXCEPT go to AA.
By the time I left the facility 10 days later...I had heard over and over from Drs that gave speeches everyday to the patients on what alcohol does to your brain...etc...they weren't pushing AA but every single one said the statistics were higher to quit for people who went to AA.
Then the counselor I had there WAS pushing AA and I really liked her..I made a deal with her...that I would TRY it upon leaving...I typically am a person of my word and I HAD to go for her.....And I did...and I didn't LOVE it...but I was "desperate as the dying can be" and I had no where else to go.
Fast forward...to today...I have 1 month sober (34 days)….I drank for about 6 years after my first drink in 2013....And I know AA works....I went back last year and guess what? Stayed sober for 10 months....but I wasn't ready....drank again.....
Just saying...it has a proven record...I have currently during this sobriety not been back to meetings yet...but I promised MYSELF the first craving I get (haven't had any)….that is the day I am returning to AA...and keeping some sort of schedule there...
I will DROP everything IF I get a craving and go.....This is coming from someone who said they were never going.
From 2005-2013....I went weekly about 3 times for 6 years of it.....stopped for the last 2 years....and stayed sober...It was just more comfortable being sober while in AA.
On my way to rehab that year I told the "driver" that picked me up I would do ANYTHING they told me to EXCEPT go to AA.
By the time I left the facility 10 days later...I had heard over and over from Drs that gave speeches everyday to the patients on what alcohol does to your brain...etc...they weren't pushing AA but every single one said the statistics were higher to quit for people who went to AA.
Then the counselor I had there WAS pushing AA and I really liked her..I made a deal with her...that I would TRY it upon leaving...I typically am a person of my word and I HAD to go for her.....And I did...and I didn't LOVE it...but I was "desperate as the dying can be" and I had no where else to go.
Fast forward...to today...I have 1 month sober (34 days)….I drank for about 6 years after my first drink in 2013....And I know AA works....I went back last year and guess what? Stayed sober for 10 months....but I wasn't ready....drank again.....
Just saying...it has a proven record...I have currently during this sobriety not been back to meetings yet...but I promised MYSELF the first craving I get (haven't had any)….that is the day I am returning to AA...and keeping some sort of schedule there...
I will DROP everything IF I get a craving and go.....This is coming from someone who said they were never going.
From 2005-2013....I went weekly about 3 times for 6 years of it.....stopped for the last 2 years....and stayed sober...It was just more comfortable being sober while in AA.
Administrator
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,442
Welcome back GI 
I'm sure others have had lower bottomings out that me and me more than others - it's not really a comparable measurement tho.
to me that moment when you decide you can;t live that way one more second is the key - and that's an experience all of us in recovery share
D
I'm sure others have had lower bottomings out that me and me more than others - it's not really a comparable measurement tho.
to me that moment when you decide you can;t live that way one more second is the key - and that's an experience all of us in recovery share
D
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