Therapy
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Aug 2014
Posts: 316
Therapy
Hi you guys. I’ve been sober almost 8 months and still don’t feel normal. All my bloodwork st my physical came back fine but I just feel off. Is there s point where I’ll actually stop missing the drink and stop feeling ashamed of my sobriety? My anxiety has seemed to magnify and now in what should be basic human interaction I turn into a sweaty, self loathing mess.
I just want want to be comfortable in my own skin which for whatever reason I’ve lost.
Is therapy my only solution? I feel so alone and frustrated.
I just want want to be comfortable in my own skin which for whatever reason I’ve lost.
Is therapy my only solution? I feel so alone and frustrated.
Administrator
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,442
Hi Kamm
it's really impossible for any of us to say whether you need therapy or not
I know it was a fairly long road for me to feel happy - I had a little counselling in the beginning, but really the main factor in me being happy was building a sober life I loved and didn't want to escape from., even when I had bad days..
D
it's really impossible for any of us to say whether you need therapy or not
I know it was a fairly long road for me to feel happy - I had a little counselling in the beginning, but really the main factor in me being happy was building a sober life I loved and didn't want to escape from., even when I had bad days..
D
bona fido dog-lover
Join Date: Mar 2008
Location: SF Bay area, CA
Posts: 99,780
I was at about 3 months sober and was not 'feeling it'. It was suggested that I start practicing gratitude every day. At first it was hard because I was depressed, but the more I was grateful, the more I found to be grateful for.
Being grateful in my daily life has also made me happier. Give it a try.
https://www.nytimes.com/2015/11/22/o...pier.html?_r=0
As to therapy, we can't say if you need it or not. But if you feel it could be helpful, and can access it, then look into it. I used to see an addiction counselor once a week for about 6 years. My counselor was wonderful and helped me a lot.
Congrats on your sober time!
Being grateful in my daily life has also made me happier. Give it a try.
https://www.nytimes.com/2015/11/22/o...pier.html?_r=0
As to therapy, we can't say if you need it or not. But if you feel it could be helpful, and can access it, then look into it. I used to see an addiction counselor once a week for about 6 years. My counselor was wonderful and helped me a lot.
Congrats on your sober time!
Guest
Join Date: Aug 2015
Location: Atlanta
Posts: 8,674
I am 3.5 yrs sober and while my journey in recovery began (and continues to be centered on) with AA, I've got other pieces that are important, too.
I have seen a psychiatrist all the way (and before I quit) and from hour long and bi monthly sessions to a basic med check and update every three months - I just yesterday made an appt with a therapist I plan to see weekly for the indefinite future. This is one of the toughest parts in my sobriety emotionally, and I am grateful that I am aware of that and acting on it.
Eight months is terrific- and it is still very early. Since you went it alone last year (and now you have been sober longer than then!!) I'd think that adding meetings, therapy, any other positive activity (I suck at meditating but yoga has been awesome) to have all the help possible to keep going.
We're all different but we don't have to do it alone. Keep going.
I have seen a psychiatrist all the way (and before I quit) and from hour long and bi monthly sessions to a basic med check and update every three months - I just yesterday made an appt with a therapist I plan to see weekly for the indefinite future. This is one of the toughest parts in my sobriety emotionally, and I am grateful that I am aware of that and acting on it.
Eight months is terrific- and it is still very early. Since you went it alone last year (and now you have been sober longer than then!!) I'd think that adding meetings, therapy, any other positive activity (I suck at meditating but yoga has been awesome) to have all the help possible to keep going.
We're all different but we don't have to do it alone. Keep going.
AA Member
Join Date: Mar 2016
Location: Silicon Valley
Posts: 2,983
Originally Posted by kamm 
Is therapy my only solution?
in addition to the program of aa which includes meetings, i saw a therapist (counselor) when i was ......
in my first year sober
in my 10th year sober
in my 22nd year sober
ive had tragedies over the years that i needed extra help with
Member
Join Date: Jan 2011
Location: Warwick RI
Posts: 1,276
Originally Posted by kamm
Hi you guys. I’ve been sober almost 8 months and still don’t feel normal. All my bloodwork st my physical came back fine but I just feel off. Is there s point where I’ll actually stop missing the drink and stop feeling ashamed of my sobriety? My anxiety has seemed to magnify and now in what should be basic human interaction I turn into a sweaty, self loathing mess.
I just want want to be comfortable in my own skin which for whatever reason I’ve lost.
Is therapy my only solution? I feel so alone and frustrated.
I just want want to be comfortable in my own skin which for whatever reason I’ve lost.
Is therapy my only solution? I feel so alone and frustrated.
Was there anything you enjoyed as a kid? Running, walking, lifting, tennis, etc.? Painting, reading...helping others? You need to find something to do...to fill the time so the days pass and you have some sense of accomplishment in your day.
Therapy or AA never hurts...thou...
I know it is really hard for many people to try either one of these.
I was ONE of those people...but in 2005 AA truly saved my life much to my surprise I somewhat enjoyed it...
I look at AA as medicine and my Therapy...
I don't always like them..."but I take them anyway" because I feel they both help me with staying sober...keeping me busy...filling some time.
Member
Join Date: Nov 2018
Posts: 5,169
Originally Posted by kamm
Is therapy my only solution?
I view therapy as a helpful aid as self knowledge is always better than ignorance. But quitting alcohol, no matter what approach works for you, will require a behavior change as well. You can't just think your way out of the problem. You have to stop drinking, and it needs to be a life long commitment.
Member
Join Date: Jan 2012
Location: West Tn
Posts: 3,043
I had my semi-annual check up with my psychiatrist today and I told her I may want her to point me in the direction of a psychologist who specializes in family of origin issues.
I have a sneaking suspicion that a good bit of my personality was forged during early years that I spent in an alcoholic and shaming environment.
Part of my recovery is to learn to live and think in a normal, healthy way, and I have worked hard to do so.
But it would be interesting to learn some of the make-up of my personality and instincts.
I have a sneaking suspicion that a good bit of my personality was forged during early years that I spent in an alcoholic and shaming environment.
Part of my recovery is to learn to live and think in a normal, healthy way, and I have worked hard to do so.
But it would be interesting to learn some of the make-up of my personality and instincts.
12-Step Recovered Alkie
Join Date: May 2010
Location: West Bloomfield, MI
Posts: 5,797
Therapy can be a great thing, but it isn't always. The first therapist, who I saw for a year and a half on a weekly basis, absolutely didn't have what it took to help me. It's not entirely a knock on him as I wasn't really honest with him to begin with AND I wasn't really aware of what was really going on with me.
A couple therapists later, I found myself in the office of a lady only she was a recovered drug addict. I think she have 15 years at the time. She knew more about me than I knew about myself, no question about it.
Though I was there because of a court order and what I believed was an alcohol and drug problem, she helped me open up to the idea that the drinking and the drugs were possibly just a symptom of something bigger and badder - alcoholism.
Once I learned what alcoholism really is.......and that it affects an alcoholic me when I'm drinking but even MORESO when I'm not drinking, it started to make sense that even with 9 months abstinance, I wasn't REALLY feeling better internally / mentally / spiritually / whatever you want to call it.
Discovering that my dry time was what I needed a solution for changed the entire direction I'd been thinking I needed to head in. To this day I still call her on the anniversary of my first visit with her and thank her for basically saving my life. Without learning what was really wrong with me, there's no doubt in my mind I would have been back drinking by now instead of working on my 13th year in recovery.
A couple therapists later, I found myself in the office of a lady only she was a recovered drug addict. I think she have 15 years at the time. She knew more about me than I knew about myself, no question about it.
Though I was there because of a court order and what I believed was an alcohol and drug problem, she helped me open up to the idea that the drinking and the drugs were possibly just a symptom of something bigger and badder - alcoholism.
Once I learned what alcoholism really is.......and that it affects an alcoholic me when I'm drinking but even MORESO when I'm not drinking, it started to make sense that even with 9 months abstinance, I wasn't REALLY feeling better internally / mentally / spiritually / whatever you want to call it.
Discovering that my dry time was what I needed a solution for changed the entire direction I'd been thinking I needed to head in. To this day I still call her on the anniversary of my first visit with her and thank her for basically saving my life. Without learning what was really wrong with me, there's no doubt in my mind I would have been back drinking by now instead of working on my 13th year in recovery.
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