Cosima11

I was in a physically abusive relationship. After it started was when I crossed the line of no return from "problem drinking" into full on alcoholism. I'd never experienced violence before and refused to process what had happened sober.. I stayed with him and continued drinking and eventually started hitting back even though I knew I'd "lose" the fight. Anytime I got drunk around other people there was no telling if or when I'd decide to purge it from my subconscious by going on and on about it.. crying or getting angry for no apparent reason. Never physically violent but emotionally just out of control and totally irrational. A liability to myself and others.

This continued even after I left the relationship, it was terrible. It didn't always happen when I drank but eventually I knew it would at some unpredictable time and that wasn't gong to change. I had to stop drinking entirely. Once you've been a victim I can see how it's easy to victimize others and with alcohol in the picture you're not really calling the shots..I know you're young but it's doable. Don't ignore the warning signs because things really can and do get worse.