ThatWasTheOldMe

I'm a worthless loser anyway.
I'll be stuck forever no matter what I do.

But if I drink enough, theres a slight chance I will get in the appropriate mindset to off myself and that would be an escape.

You can say this makes me weak or selfish or anything you want to say, buy that won't bother me because I've already accepted that I'm a worthless loser. So of course I'm weak and selfish...

ImNotThatGuy

If you say you're a "worthless loser," you will arrange your reality to fit that belief.

Try this: Look at yourself in the mirror and repeat "I'm a valuable winner" 100x in the morning. Do the same 100x in the evening. Do this for several days in a row. What have you got to lose?

As for "Might as well drink" so that you can work up the courage to off yourself, well, I think you need to check yourself into a hospital before you hurt yourself.

Suicide is a permanent solution to temporary problems. There are PLENTY of people in this world who have it worse than you, who have clawed their way back from homelessness or incarceration to lead happy, productive lives. Stop the stinkin' thinkin', man. Just cut it out.

August252015

Hey there - so here's a first thought. You've been brave enough to join us here, willing to do the hard first things of not drinking and starting to look at yourself - and in my opinion, that alone makes you incredibly worthwhile (beyond inherent worthiness!). So. Many. More. People. can't or won't do that much.

i hope you trust that idea just enough to take the risk on a sober you. It is beyond worth it.

Anna

You are not stuck and you are not a loser. You are in the right place to seek support for your alcoholism and we're here for you.

Please talk to your dr or go to an ER if you're feeling suicidal.

braebear

I'll be stuck forever no matter what I do.
So not true. Do you WANT to be stuck? Or do you WANT to change it? Let me tell you, changing ANYTHING is better sober....I'm only 8 days in, and the simple little changes I'm making are 200% better being sober. You ARE worth it...You are NOT selfish...You are NOT weak! I read a quote this morning and I think it may apply here... "Doing your best in THIS moment, puts you in the BEST position for the NEXT moment".... Do yourself a favor, do you best in this moment.... God love you!

Callas

You can do that, or you can do something else. It’s up to you. I remember reading many positive posts from you when I first joined about 4 months ago. It was inspirational. You can be that guy again if you choose to.

least

Please don't drink if there's the chance that you'll hurt yourself. I've been where you are and it's not pretty. Please get help for your feelings. You are not worthless.

WhoDeyPI

Hang in there bud. From someone who self medicated my depression with alcohol for years, it only makes it worse. It may not feel like it right now, but happier times are up ahead.

silentrun

What you said is the reason I will never drink again. It took me almost 2 years but I finally busted down that door and confronted who it was that constantly said those things to me in my mind and made them shut up.

It's lies, all lies, just part of addiction.

Don't fall for it.

Mac4711

Sent you a PM.

Doris47

I can't tell you how much this upset me, let me tell you something my friend. Each and everyone of us have been to hell and back. Each and everyone of us have been desperate at one time or another.
You are not alone, you have to dig deep and find your fire, it's hard when you feel the way you do. When life gets too much and the dark cloud gather in it seems the only way out is to end it. I get it, I truly do.
But you are somebody,you are strong, you can fight. Don't give up hope,
Much love to you
Doris xx

AnvilheadII

quoting a really bright, sober guy from the other day:

F*** alcohol. For people that are dependent on it, I feel for you. Your brain thinks it needs it to survive - and in a way, it does because withdrawal is hell.

I'm happily sober. Please do what it takes to join me.

MantaLady

It’s not who you are that is holding you back, it’s who you think you are not! If you want to be unstuck then that is within your power to achieve as it is with everyone. If you keep telling yourself you can’t doesn’t actually mean you can’t but what it does mean is you won’t. Life is not beating you down, you are beating you down and until you give yourself a break and start challenging this negative self talk nothing will change. All real change starts and ends from within.

Take care and rooting for you xx

ScottFromWI

There's actually zero chance of that. It's just more BS you are buying into from your addiction. And no, you aren't a loser - you are an addict. If you decide to accept that and treat it accordingly things can improve for you, just like they did for me and many others like us.

Having said that, there is a 100% chance that wallowing in self pity and bemoaning it publicly will not get you anywhere. So how about getting yourself someplace where you can get the help you need?

Kaily

Addiction is worthless not you. Fight your way out with everything you have and kick it to the kerb where it belongs.

Rooting for you.

Hawkeye13

The negative self-talk and drinking just took me further into darkness.

Getting out was / is / has been a very hard slog not for the fainthearted.
But addiction makes us so fainthearted.

As someone above said, you gotta find your fire before you put yourself out.

Another one who is rooting for you--you are worth saving.

mariposa

August252015

Those ends of the spectrum are dead on.

In AA we are steered toward sharing ESH - Experience, Strength and Hope. What we were like, what we did to change, and what it is like now. And, to be short on the E (ie not dwelling, bemoaning, drunkaloguing....) and heavier on the S and heaviest on the H because that's where everyone can go. There is hope if we are still alive.

I hope you seek help beyond us, and keep sharing here too.

DontRemember

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=foj3lB7vtDo

Abraham

Wow. Sorry I thought you were being sarcastic. Why would you say things like that about yourself? This is an unfortunate situation if true. Maybe try thinking on the bright side. Whatever the true situation you have to try looking on the bright side. There is always someone who loses more and there are always people who win more. Most of us are inbetween.