Im a total loser
 

Why cant I just accept it and be content with my lot in life.

im so tired of trying to fix myself.

i had issues long before I picked up a drink.

Im 55 and Im beaten.

I just want some peace.

Good morning. First off you are not a loser. YOU can fix this. Just take it one day at a time. One hour. One minute. It all adds up. Thats that voice making you want to get a case of the f#&k it's. Try talking to who you call your higher power. Anything but not drink. That will not solve your problems iwndwyt

Dandy,
I changed my life in my mid-40’s. I wish I had done it earlier, but it is what it is.

I was exhausted, and really just wanted some peace with myself and within my life. Quitting the drink was a leap of faith, as I knew there were many issues that led to my misery. Like many of us, I thought my only solace was at the bottom of the bottle, so giving it up was difficult. However, that decision has paid off in ways I didn’t anticipate.

It is never too late to reinvent yourself. We can all work towards being the best person we can be today. The fact that I had thrown away so many years drinking did not justify throwing away the years I had left. And behold, while life is far from perfect, there is a peace and serenity in sobriety that I never had while drinking.

Rather than “fixing myself”, I choose to see it as making better choices so I am at peace with how I live.

Best wishes,
-bora

Sorry to read you are feeling so low Dandelion. A useless person would never lay out their pain on SR but a smart person who is suffering would.

At the age of 54 I felt the same way as you Dandelion. I could literally feel the alcohol killing me on the inside and see it ruining my relationships and life chances on the outside.

I knew I could never beat the cravings using willpower alone. Fear, misery and desperation made me to look at my addiction front on and arrive at a method for minimising and avoiding the cravings long enough for them to recede enough to not trouble me (a couple of months)

Once you get beyond that early craving stage it gives you a real confidence boost because after that dealing with other problems that life inevitably throws in our path is never quite as tough as the problem you have beaten. The answer to your drinking is within you - you can find it and you can beat the addiction.

Good luck!

Thank you all so much

Seems like when you need love and care the most people vanish.

Love to all here

dlion

iwndwyt. My thoughts exactly. lol

What does iwndwyt mean?

I Will Not Drink With You Today.

Thank you

You're not a loser, just in a bad place right now. Its temporary. Time to get to work? Sobriety....simple but not easy.

You're not a loser but your addiction sure wants you to believe that. If you feel like a loser, you drink. Do you see the calculus?

In order to start to feel better I had to take steps to remove the stuff in my life that was tearing me down. And that started with booze.

You and I are about the same age. Too old to be young, too young to be old. We're in the tween years of old age. Ha! Its weird. How do I dress? Who am I? What do I do for 'fun'? How do I 'feel' about myself?'

Its a weird time to be 'finding' oneself. But that is what we have to do in order to stay sober.

Booze will continue to keep you down and kick you in the teeth. But remember, only you can let it do that to you. There are many things in life that are out of our control. Don't believe that the choice to drink is beyond your grasp...it obviously isn't, you are drinking. You can choose not to as well.

Get help with detox if you need it. No shame there. Only an empowering choice to take your life back.

You are not a loser, like most of us, you are a product of, "The Addictive Belief System."

“I should be perfect and perfection is possible; I should be all-powerful controlling myself and others;​ I should always get what I want and life should be without pain and require little or no effort.” The simple truth is that life will never be easy, fair and painless. We are never going to always get what we want. Intellectually, we may know this, but emotionally...not so much. The problem is, that the addictive personality believes that life should be easy, fair and painless! When we allow ourselves to think in this, "entitled," fashion, we lower our threshold to adversity, to feeling frustrated, helpless and overwhelmed. If we insist on avoiding emotional pain, on being comfortable all the time, we will seek ways to avoid reality, to escape our negative mood. With respect to addictive thinking, this type of corrupted belief system is the very core of addictive thinking and can lead to attempting to regain control with a, "Quick fix or mood changer," of drugs and or other errant behaviors, all designed to change the way we feel emotionally.


"No man is free until they master themselves." Epictetus.

You are about to embark on a grand journey if you allow it.

Feelings and behaviors are caused by a person's thoughts, not on outside stimuli like people, situations and events. People may not be able to control their external circumstances, but they can change how they think about them and therefore change how they feel and behave (Romans 12:2).

lol. Yea, I dont think in a million years I would have figured that one out. I figured it was a typo. Hilarious.

I'm just gonna walk around in real life saying "I wind wit."