Hello!
 

Hello! I'm a 50 year old woman maried to a man about the same age. I came here to get support. I'd like to jump right in and ask about the signs of alcoholism.

My husband used to drink wine occassionally with dinner and every now and then a cocktail. I also drink a glass of wine with dinner occassionally.

For the past month or so my husband has changed his normal drinking pattern. Every evening he has 3 or 4 drinks of liquor and wine. On the weekends I have seen him down a large bottle of wine then start on the hard stuff. The drinking goes on all weekend long. He even forgets to eat. He buys large bottles of whiskey. He claims it's going to lower his cholestrol.

I am afraid he is turning into an alcoholic. He denies he has a problem. He yells very loud at me every time I try having a normal conversation. he tells me I need to grow up. Remember we are in our 50's.

I grew up with an alcoholic father. I saw what my mother went through. My dad was an alcoholic when he and my mom married so I don't know the beginning signs. I do know his behavior was similar to what my husband is displaying now. My dad died of liver disease.

My husband has apologized for yelling only to turn around and do it again.

I guess I need a sounding board. I know he won't see what he is becoming unless he wants to see it and seek help. so the best thing I can do is get help for myself. Thank you. CircusInTown :clown:

Welcome Circus in town,

You will find alot of support and healing here at SR. I wish you the best. My thoughts & prayers are with you.

Check out the Al-non or family & friends boards here at SR.

Welcome on SR C.I.T
Like I can hear it looks like you're husband is an alcoholic..I think you will find a lot of suport on the al anon section..And of course you can keep posting here becose like me I'm an alcoholic but I can learn a lot out of your thread..I wish you a lot of luck..And you will find great suport here...Love from Stefanie :hug:

Welcome CIT!
Who knows what he is going through, maybe he's having a hard time with work, other family members and using this to cope. Though he does sound like he may be developing a problem, only he can decide while you observe. For many the disease takes hold later in life. If this is completly new behavior, maybe something else is going on, then maybe again, his tendency toward alcoholism is just starting to develop. Please visit our Friends and Family forum to get additional support.

Alcoholism has no age limits, it's cunning, baffling and powerful and will progress. In the meantime we will be here.

Hi Circus

Welcome to SR.

It sure sounds like there is a whole lot going on here. I can't comment on the sudden changes in behaviour. Are there underlying issues which are causing your H to be stressed?

One thing for sure is that no amount of Whisky is going to help his cholesterol level. Is he deluding himself by finding an excuse to keep drinking?

We alcoholics are great at delusion and in the course of perpetuating the myth that "we're OK", we actually start to believe ourselves. If alcohol really has taken a hold of your H, he can find lots of support here or at AA. He needs to be strong and genuinely want to do something about it.

Meanwhile, you need to take care of yourself.

Good luck.

Rich

Thank you all for listening and giving me enough thoughts to enforce the fact that there is a serious problem.

I feel that there is something going on but I don't know what it is. It could be something he found out and doesn't want to share it. It could be work related also. One time he lost a job and for 2 weeks left and came home each day without telling me.

He went on a two day trip and came back with more liquor. As soon as he got home he started drinking.

I've read the 12 steps but he does not believe in a higher power. I know he has to realize HE has a serious problem going on. All I can do is live as normal as I can in an abnormal situation until I am able to do something about it. It really hurts Aries. It hurts because I have asked him what is going on and he transfers blame to me for everything that doesn't go right in his life. I've did nothing and I want to be careful so as to not make up excuses for his drinking excessively.

When I was a child I felt overwhelmed from an early age. My dad was an alcoholic. I was too young to know what was wrong but I naturally knew it wasn't normal behavior. He kept us up nights, talked and cursed and I was scared. I don't think my mom, who became a co-dependent, ever wanted to acknowledge what he did to me and my sister.
I have no children with this man. My children are adults and his are far away. So that is a good thing.

Well, I will come back here again, thank you all again. :jester: