venuscat

Well, any selfish behaviour impacts our marriages I think (she says with all the wisdom of being married less than 2 years, so ha)....he isn't really being supportive by the looks of things, and that doesn't feel fair. It feels selfish....you should be as important to him as he is...your needs should matter.

I mean, you are putting up with him drinking: why can't he put up with you not drinking with a bit more grace? xx

MLD51

I think you're right about it causing them to face their own reality. Also, they (your husband and your friends) could be afraid you will judge them. I had one friend tell me he assumed I'd look down on him now that I'm sober and he still drinks. Ha. Far from it, I told him. I have no leg to stand on when it comes to judging other peoples' drinking. That doesn't mean I have to be around them when they drink, though.

It's really a shame your husband can't be supportive of your sobriety. I don't think I could be in a relationship with someone who didn't support my efforts to make myself a better person. My SO still drinks, sometimes a lot, but he has been unwavering in his support of my sobriety, and tells me often how proud he is of me. We all deserve people like that in our lives, because we are doing something really difficult and somewhat heroic. We need to have people around who tell us they understand that.