Doctor's appointment tomorrow! Outing myself! Advice?
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Join Date: Jun 2014
Location: Mediterranean
Posts: 187
Doctor's appointment tomorrow! Outing myself! Advice?
Hi - hope it's OK to post here x
I'm 3 days sober (longest I've managed in about 2yrs!)
I joined SR in 2016 when I first realised I had a problem... since then there's been several half-hearted efforts, lots of denial, a steady increase in alcohol consumption alongside a notable deterioration in my health (shocker!) 😏 Meanwhile my family, home and full-time job all flourish as I give 100% of myself, and limp into bed each night hollow yet awash with gin 🙈
Recent months have seen me studying mindfulness and gradually building up towards taking this step. Realising it's OK to look after MYSELF, and start actually prioritising my health and well-being. I've reduced my stress and anxiety considerably. My career and relationship are strong. I am so damn ready! 👊
I turn 40 in exactly one month, and this decade of my 30's has been a wild ride of heavy drinking years... I never saw it coming. It ends here... thank God it's ending! My 40's await, like virgin snow! 😁 Well, a future full of health, well-being, rebirth, peace and rediscovery 😌
I'm booked in to see a doctor tomorrow at 3.10pm. I'm outting myself to a medical professional! Finally! I'm nervous and a bit scared. Not so much of being judged now - it's a relief to finally do this. (I'm almost ready to shout it from the rooftops, once I've got more sober-time under my belt!) I just don't know this doctor and hope I can establish a rapport, that they are patient and let me speak, not be dismissive and shoo me out the door. 🤔 I've planned out what I'm going to say and in what order. I've written notes and everything. I'm worried about having a big rubber stamp screaming 'ALCOHOLIC!' being stamped on my notes!! Yet pretty sure they don't do that?? Mostly I'm worried that bloods will confirm serious liver damage, but right now I need to just get the bloods referral and start finding answers. My health is so badly affected... isn't it funny how your body just screams NO MORE!! to the point you physically can't ignore it anymore??
Sorry for the garbled post, it's late and I'm just excited to finally retrieve my login data and come back in here. Im really doing it, I'm finally TAKING ACTION!!!
CG x
I'm 3 days sober (longest I've managed in about 2yrs!)
I joined SR in 2016 when I first realised I had a problem... since then there's been several half-hearted efforts, lots of denial, a steady increase in alcohol consumption alongside a notable deterioration in my health (shocker!) 😏 Meanwhile my family, home and full-time job all flourish as I give 100% of myself, and limp into bed each night hollow yet awash with gin 🙈
Recent months have seen me studying mindfulness and gradually building up towards taking this step. Realising it's OK to look after MYSELF, and start actually prioritising my health and well-being. I've reduced my stress and anxiety considerably. My career and relationship are strong. I am so damn ready! 👊
I turn 40 in exactly one month, and this decade of my 30's has been a wild ride of heavy drinking years... I never saw it coming. It ends here... thank God it's ending! My 40's await, like virgin snow! 😁 Well, a future full of health, well-being, rebirth, peace and rediscovery 😌
I'm booked in to see a doctor tomorrow at 3.10pm. I'm outting myself to a medical professional! Finally! I'm nervous and a bit scared. Not so much of being judged now - it's a relief to finally do this. (I'm almost ready to shout it from the rooftops, once I've got more sober-time under my belt!) I just don't know this doctor and hope I can establish a rapport, that they are patient and let me speak, not be dismissive and shoo me out the door. 🤔 I've planned out what I'm going to say and in what order. I've written notes and everything. I'm worried about having a big rubber stamp screaming 'ALCOHOLIC!' being stamped on my notes!! Yet pretty sure they don't do that?? Mostly I'm worried that bloods will confirm serious liver damage, but right now I need to just get the bloods referral and start finding answers. My health is so badly affected... isn't it funny how your body just screams NO MORE!! to the point you physically can't ignore it anymore??
Sorry for the garbled post, it's late and I'm just excited to finally retrieve my login data and come back in here. Im really doing it, I'm finally TAKING ACTION!!!
CG x
Last edited by Cowgirlie; 06-04-2019 at 05:16 PM. Reason: grammar!
Member
Join Date: Feb 2015
Location: MN
Posts: 8,704
Since you've never seen this doctor before, I would tread lightly. Asking for a complete blood profile is great. I would try and establish a repore with him/her before you lay out your darkest secrets. Alcoholism is a serious issue and I tend to be very careful about who I shared it with, including my doctor.
COngrats on 3 days and your desire to get professional help. Hope all goes great for you.
COngrats on 3 days and your desire to get professional help. Hope all goes great for you.
bona fido dog-lover
Join Date: Mar 2008
Location: SF Bay area, CA
Posts: 99,759
Welcome back! 
I'd just tell the doctor you want to stop drinking and might need help getting thru the withdrawal. Sometimes benzoes are given for a few days to ease the w/d anxiety and reduce the risk of seizures.
I hope you will use this site to get sober for good. It's a better way to live, for sure.
I'd just tell the doctor you want to stop drinking and might need help getting thru the withdrawal. Sometimes benzoes are given for a few days to ease the w/d anxiety and reduce the risk of seizures. I hope you will use this site to get sober for good. It's a better way to live, for sure.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jun 2014
Location: Mediterranean
Posts: 187
Thanks for the feedback! Good points.
I should probably have clarified: I need bloods doing each year to monitor an existing thyroid issue. So I'm going under that pretext as they are due now. Planning to mention digestive problems to request a wider blood test than the usual one.
But thank you, I will certainly get a feel for what I'm comfortable saying once I'm in the room. Fingers crossed x
I should probably have clarified: I need bloods doing each year to monitor an existing thyroid issue. So I'm going under that pretext as they are due now. Planning to mention digestive problems to request a wider blood test than the usual one.
But thank you, I will certainly get a feel for what I'm comfortable saying once I'm in the room. Fingers crossed x
Member
Join Date: Jun 2019
Posts: 290
Welcome to your 40's! I turn 41 in just a little over a month.
I really enjoyed the enthusiasm of your post! Something tells me you'll know just what to say and how much during your appointment tomorrow.
For me over the past couple weeks I've been a lot more mindful of my diet and I'm nearly back down the the weight I was in high school, without starving or ridiculous exercise. Our bodies have an amazing ability to heal and regenerate, and I believe positivity and enthusiasm help them even more.
I really enjoyed the enthusiasm of your post! Something tells me you'll know just what to say and how much during your appointment tomorrow.
For me over the past couple weeks I've been a lot more mindful of my diet and I'm nearly back down the the weight I was in high school, without starving or ridiculous exercise. Our bodies have an amazing ability to heal and regenerate, and I believe positivity and enthusiasm help them even more.
Member
Join Date: Aug 2017
Posts: 850
Good for you for taking this step! I agree you definitely have to be an active patient and be firm in requesting the tests you want done, even if the doctor seems dismissive.
I have no experience talking to my doctor about alcoholism specifically because I never fully confessed, but I do have experience on dismissive doctors when my health was at risk. One thing I would say is to tell them to note down in your chart that they refused to do any tests etc, so that it’s marked that they did not perform them even tho you requested them. It probably won’t happen, but it keeps them liable just in case. You’ll find that they are more likely to explore all the options after that.
Good luck! I hope you come back and report on how it went.
I have no experience talking to my doctor about alcoholism specifically because I never fully confessed, but I do have experience on dismissive doctors when my health was at risk. One thing I would say is to tell them to note down in your chart that they refused to do any tests etc, so that it’s marked that they did not perform them even tho you requested them. It probably won’t happen, but it keeps them liable just in case. You’ll find that they are more likely to explore all the options after that.
Good luck! I hope you come back and report on how it went.
Administrator
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,373
I understand why people are cautious, but I think its always best to be honest.
May as well not mention it at all if you're only going to let out dribs and drabs of the story.
I'm not in your part of the world but I'm not aware of any red lettered 'ALCOHOLIC' stamped across my file
Even if that were the case that would be between me and my Doctor
European rules on doctor patient confidentiality look to be quite strict.
D
May as well not mention it at all if you're only going to let out dribs and drabs of the story.
I'm not in your part of the world but I'm not aware of any red lettered 'ALCOHOLIC' stamped across my file
Even if that were the case that would be between me and my Doctor
European rules on doctor patient confidentiality look to be quite strict.
http://www.ceom-ecmo.eu/en/view/prin...medical-ethics
Article 7
The doctor is the patient’s necessary confidant. He or she must guarantee the complete secrecy of all the information he or she has collected and the findings made during his or her contact with the patient.
The patient’s death does not exempt the doctor from medical confidentiality.
The doctor must respect the patient’s privacy and take all necessary measures to render impossible the disclosure of all the information he or she has acquired while exercising his or her profession.
If exceptions to medical confidentiality are provided for by national law, the doctor may ask for the prior opinion of his association or the professional body of similar competence.
Article 7
The doctor is the patient’s necessary confidant. He or she must guarantee the complete secrecy of all the information he or she has collected and the findings made during his or her contact with the patient.
The patient’s death does not exempt the doctor from medical confidentiality.
The doctor must respect the patient’s privacy and take all necessary measures to render impossible the disclosure of all the information he or she has acquired while exercising his or her profession.
If exceptions to medical confidentiality are provided for by national law, the doctor may ask for the prior opinion of his association or the professional body of similar competence.
Member
Join Date: Dec 2014
Posts: 2,966
Be 100% honest about your drinking habits. Obviously there's no reason to go too indepth about 'nights out' and such, but be honest about your desire to 100% cut it out from your life. Look at it this way; The Doctor works for you. They can't(ethically and sometimes legally) 'out you' and their primary job is to help. Once I started acepting all the help from willing(some paid) people I got sober, it got waaayy easier.
Member
Join Date: Aug 2017
Posts: 245
I'm so happy to read a post like this. It fills me with optimism. I think that you're definitely taking the right approach and not to mention that... THAT'S THE ATTITUDE! Congratulations.
In the doctor's note, I would be completely honest with them. It's for the best.
In the doctor's note, I would be completely honest with them. It's for the best.
12 Step Recovered Alcoholic
Join Date: Apr 2012
Location: New Zealand
Posts: 6,613
Be completely honest with your doctor especially about how much and how often you drink. Misleading your doctor can lead to mis-diagnosis which can open up a whole new hell of addicition.
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Jun 2014
Location: Mediterranean
Posts: 187
Originally Posted by Hope1989 
I'm so happy to read a post like this. It fills me with optimism. I think that you're definitely taking the right approach and not to mention that... THAT'S THE ATTITUDE! Congratulations.
In the doctor's note, I would be completely honest with them. It's for the best.
In the doctor's note, I would be completely honest with them. It's for the best.
I remember life being like this, years ago! 🌈🌟
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Join Date: Jun 2014
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Posts: 187
Originally Posted by Gottalife
Be completely honest with your doctor especially about how much and how often you drink. Misleading your doctor can lead to mis-diagnosis which can open up a whole new hell of addicition.
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Posts: 187
Originally Posted by DontRemember
Be 100% honest about your drinking habits. Obviously there's no reason to go too indepth about 'nights out' and such, but be honest about your desire to 100% cut it out from your life. Look at it this way; The Doctor works for you. They can't(ethically and sometimes legally) 'out you' and their primary job is to help. Once I started acepting all the help from willing(some paid) people I got sober, it got waaayy easier.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jun 2014
Location: Mediterranean
Posts: 187
Originally Posted by Dee74
I understand why people are cautious, but I think its always best to be honest.
May as well not mention it at all if you're only going to let out dribs and drabs of the story.
I'm not in your part of the world but I'm not aware of any red lettered 'ALCOHOLIC' stamped across my file
Even if that were the case that would be between me and my Doctor
European rules on doctor patient confidentiality look to be quite strict.
D
May as well not mention it at all if you're only going to let out dribs and drabs of the story.
I'm not in your part of the world but I'm not aware of any red lettered 'ALCOHOLIC' stamped across my file
Even if that were the case that would be between me and my Doctor
European rules on doctor patient confidentiality look to be quite strict.
D
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jun 2014
Location: Mediterranean
Posts: 187
Originally Posted by dpac414
Good for you for taking this step! I agree you definitely have to be an active patient and be firm in requesting the tests you want done, even if the doctor seems dismissive.
I have no experience talking to my doctor about alcoholism specifically because I never fully confessed, but I do have experience on dismissive doctors when my health was at risk. One thing I would say is to tell them to note down in your chart that they refused to do any tests etc, so that it’s marked that they did not perform them even tho you requested them. It probably won’t happen, but it keeps them liable just in case. You’ll find that they are more likely to explore all the options after that.
Good luck! I hope you come back and report on how it went.
I have no experience talking to my doctor about alcoholism specifically because I never fully confessed, but I do have experience on dismissive doctors when my health was at risk. One thing I would say is to tell them to note down in your chart that they refused to do any tests etc, so that it’s marked that they did not perform them even tho you requested them. It probably won’t happen, but it keeps them liable just in case. You’ll find that they are more likely to explore all the options after that.
Good luck! I hope you come back and report on how it went.
Member
Join Date: May 2019
Location: UK
Posts: 3,925
I’ve seen comments from people who’ve seen their doctors to ask about quitting alcohol and feeling like the doctor wasn’t interested. My GP was interested in helping me, but I was well organised and had a plan.
Be prepared to:
1. Say how much you drink. Be honest obviously but be clear. Don’t be vague or spend minutes thinking how much last week, etc. State a figure of your weekly amount.
2. Say how long you’ve drunk for - again be concise.
3. Any aches or pains
4. Most important - say you want to quit and in what sort of timescale. Don’t say you want to cut down or the doc might take you less seriously,
5. Do research on drugs such as Antabuse and mention these. Even if not suitable, the doc will know you mean business.
6. Bring notepad and pen with your points and questions already written. Make notes.
It takes guts to do what you’re doing, but a doc will have heard it all before. They won’t judge you, but from what I’ve heard they might be not overly helpful. Be organised and show them you’ll stop with a bit of help.
well done and good luck
Be prepared to:
1. Say how much you drink. Be honest obviously but be clear. Don’t be vague or spend minutes thinking how much last week, etc. State a figure of your weekly amount.
2. Say how long you’ve drunk for - again be concise.
3. Any aches or pains
4. Most important - say you want to quit and in what sort of timescale. Don’t say you want to cut down or the doc might take you less seriously,
5. Do research on drugs such as Antabuse and mention these. Even if not suitable, the doc will know you mean business.
6. Bring notepad and pen with your points and questions already written. Make notes.
It takes guts to do what you’re doing, but a doc will have heard it all before. They won’t judge you, but from what I’ve heard they might be not overly helpful. Be organised and show them you’ll stop with a bit of help.
well done and good luck
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Join Date: Aug 2015
Location: Atlanta
Posts: 8,674
Originally Posted by Cowgirlie
Thanks for the feedback! Good points.
I should probably have clarified: I need bloods doing each year to monitor an existing thyroid issue. So I'm going under that pretext as they are due now. Planning to mention digestive problems to request a wider blood test than the usual one.
But thank you, I will certainly get a feel for what I'm comfortable saying once I'm in the room. Fingers crossed x
I should probably have clarified: I need bloods doing each year to monitor an existing thyroid issue. So I'm going under that pretext as they are due now. Planning to mention digestive problems to request a wider blood test than the usual one.
But thank you, I will certainly get a feel for what I'm comfortable saying once I'm in the room. Fingers crossed x
I can't stress enough how critical it was that I was finally, truly HONEST with my dr. I'd shaded the truth or downplayed my drinking for years. They don't all know how to truly help us alcoholics, but they def can't if we don't help them by being honest. Even a dr who is aware enough of what they CAN'T do to help and gives you a referral is a gift.
Also - I'm very glad you are getting all the tests. It was terrifying to me but I finally had to do it- knowing that the only way I could deal with whatever my liver panels were if I got sober.
This is a really important step! Let us know how it goes and what your NEXT step is!
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