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1st Sober Holiday

Old 06-01-2019, 06:12 PM
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1st Sober Holiday

As I write this, I am sitting on the coach going to the airport, Palma Majorca in Spain.

I have just spent 5 glorious nights with my beautiful daughter, who is turning 7 today. We stayed at an All inclusive hotel with 3 fabulous swimming pools and a beautiful beach close by where we divided our time.

I drank water, diet coke, tea, coffee, LOADS of pineapple juice, a couple of Virgin Mary's and even a good old sticky sweet slush puppy or 2!!

People were drinking all around me. Beers, cocktails and wine (my drink of choice) was on tap in the restaurant! The thoughts of a drink did come but I am no longer powerless over alcohol and I can swat them away like an annoying fly!!! I am under no illusion that "just one drink" whether it be a beer, a glass of wine or a cocktail, will take literally EVERYTHING away from me. "Just one drink" would have had me filling up my water bottle at breakfast with that wine on tap. "Just one drink" would lead to absolute carnage. In fact, I have no idea where it will take me. Once I put alcohol in me I have no control whatsoever.

So,,,, I have had the best time! WE have had the best time! Not only did I not drink but the obsession to drink has left me. I feel free. Waking up every day hangover free! Ahhhhh what a true blessing. I always felt like absolute death every morning of every holiday I have had in the last 20 years and had to drag myself out of bed. Ugh! Not this one. We swam, played ball, relaxed on our lilos and threw each other off the lilos!! We jumped waves in the sea, built sandcastles, read our books, ate lots of ice cream, and did some exploring. We went into the kiddies disco at night and I sat watching my beautiful daughter dancing along to the entertainment. I feel completely relaxed and reinvigorated despite it being only 3am here and having to get up for our flight home in the middle of the night. I never knew having a holiday could make one feel so amazing. I always felt like death at the end of my holidays. Even when I was pregnant with my daughter I didn't have an alcohol free holiday 😞😞 I slipped in the odd pina colada and glass of wine with dinner. And when I wasn't doing that I was watching people drink wishing I could. I just didnt know how to live without alcohol.

Every day when I wake up I pray to God to keep me sober and during the day I practice gratitude. Yesterday I was in the pool about 6pm the sun was shining through the palm tree glistening off the clear water, my daughter was swimming in front of me and I just felt so grateful, and so bloody happy. I just said thank you God.

Sober recovery and AA have given me my life back. I will never ever pick up a drink again, one day at a time. I am an alcoholic and I always will be but I do not need or want to drink today. That is a miracle.

For anyone struggling please do not give up. 13 months ago I was broken. Today, I am happy and have real moments of peace and serenity. It hasnt been easy for me. I have struggled some days really badly. And I post here when I do and share in my AA meetings. It hasn't always been easy but I am telling you it is WORTH it.

For the 2nd year running, my daughter will be getting the best birthday present ever, a sober and present mummy..and I have my life back.

❤🙏❤🙏
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Old 06-01-2019, 06:18 PM
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Snitch - What a beautiful testament to sobriety. Such a wonderful thing, to share that lovely time with your daughter. She'll remember this her whole life. I'm glad you avoided temptation - and did so without resentment or feeling as if you were missing out.

Thank you for an uplifting post.
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Old 06-01-2019, 06:23 PM
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Yes, thank you for sharing, snitch!

Your post made my day.

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Old 06-01-2019, 06:42 PM
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Giving your daughter a sober mum is the best present you can give her.
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Old 06-01-2019, 06:55 PM
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What a wonderful and inspiring experience, I’m so happy for you, both of you! I’m very early in my sobriety, but I do look forward to going on vacations to beautiful and relaxing places and not only see the bottom of a bottle. One day!
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Old 06-01-2019, 07:23 PM
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That is absolutely beautiful. Thank you so much for sharing that.
I was picturing you doing all those activities, and to be truthful, felt a little jealous! But I'm so happy for you. What a joy to read.
Yes, through God all things are possible. We're both living proof.
Best to you and your family.
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Old 06-01-2019, 07:40 PM
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Wonderful share! I’m so glad you and your daughter had a happy, wonderful, relaxing vacation!
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Old 06-01-2019, 07:57 PM
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Awwww thank you all. We are just waiting to check in for our flight.

Dont get me wrong, as lovely as our holiday was real life does have its moments! Kids can be challenging, putting on sun cream was a real battle with her, and there were times she wanted me to come in the water when all I wanted to do was read my book! Those things, pretty minor really, would have easily sent me running for a drink!. There were times also when we went to eat I had moments of wistful thinking about a glass of wine with my meal . Eating and drinking out was a big part, well HUGE part of my life. But I have accepted what I am today. There is nothing romantic in a glass or 2 of wine for me. As soon as those thoughts come I tell them to do one as wine or any alcohol of course is pure poison to me.

I work every day at my recovery. Praying, gratitude, AA meetings, 12 step work, sober recovery, church. I stay away from pubs and bars and heavy drinking friends/people. I stay close to the fellowship and sober friends. The 12 steps of AA is allowing me to live my life sober, something I had no idea how to do!

If I can do this anyone can I really mean it!

Thanks for all your support it means so much to me. !!

😀😀😀
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Old 06-01-2019, 08:11 PM
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Originally Posted by snitch View Post
Awwww thank you all. We are just waiting to check in for our flight.

Dont get me wrong, as lovely as our holiday was real life does have its moments! Kids can be challenging, putting on sun cream was a real battle with her, and there were times she wanted me to come in the water when all I wanted to do was read my book! Those things, pretty minor really, would have easily sent me running for a drink

😀😀😀
100% for sure! When I was drinking, I found all sorts of creative ways to GET RID of my kids, pr ways to extract myself from their presence, so I could do what I wanted without them around.

Sober, I’m 100% present, and involved in all the annoying tasks that go along with parenting: applying sunscreen, prepping meals, snacks, water bottles, travel bags, etc, etc, etc! These little people require so much time and effort!

But....isn’t it wonderful that we get to participate fully in these mundane tasks with them, build memories, and have good/bad/exciting/boring whatever moments with our most precious people??
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Old 06-01-2019, 08:14 PM
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That freedom from obsession. The feeling of just being able to live as you are without trying to "fix" your mood.

That's one of the best things about sobriety--I totally agree and you captured it beautifully in your description snitch. Very inspiring--thank you!
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Old 06-01-2019, 08:30 PM
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Awesome post Snitch. You should be very proud of yourself. I can't wait to have that much sober time and serenity in my life.
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Old 06-01-2019, 08:50 PM
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Thanks for sharing that with us Snitch - sounds like an awesome time

D
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