August252015

Hey Scramm- first, glad you are here and asking.

I'd encourage you first to learn more about what alcoholism is and ISN'T. It's not about daily drinking, just bingeing, just drinking alone....it's about whether we can stop, and accepting we can't drink "normally." If you are thinking your drinking is indeed not normal (and I'd agree based on what you tell us) then yep, getting help is critical.

I'm an AA person - and I'm going to first hit on on the "God" comments above because AA is not a religious program (learning the basics of the program would be VERY helpful to you or anyone who needs to understand what it is and again ISN'T) - see below.

I will tell you that AA saves a lot of lives. Including mine, and I railed against it for years because...I didn't want to quit drinking. You'll find everyone from the near death, 24/7 vodka drinker like me...to someone starting to worry that their 2 drinks a night is consistently becoming 3. Or 4. Or...it's progressive and it doesn't get better if you keep going.

Do you want to stop? If so, then like said above, you'll fit in at AA. It's far more than a "social club for not drinking" for many of us. It's also what you make of it. For many, it's a piece or a stepping stone or a beginning to what becomes a different program of recovery.

My last words are essential: program of recovery. Active and consistent effort to get and stay sober is what we all have in common, no matter how we do it.

Anyone around here knows that I'm a dedicated AA person and it's working for 3+ years (1164 days) and indeed, I have a better life than I could have imagined. It's effort and growth (and a spiritual component which is NOT the same as a religious one - see below for the perfect way to describe it from our estimable tomsteve) and it's worth it.

Here's info on AA the program:
https://www.aa.org/pages/en_US/what-is-aa

THE GOD THING
something to think about on that whole AA being religious:
if it was religious, what religion would it be? personally when im at a meeting with a buddhist, christian, jew, athiest, catholic, and a hindu, its hard for me to pick.
religion is for people afraid of going to hell.
spirituality is for people that have been there.
AA is a spiritual set of principles.


Glad you are here and looking for a way to get sober. Plenty of options and AA is a free start - lots of support here for learning about other ways that are just as good, and might be a better fit for you. I add a lot of stuff onto my base of AA.

If you want to get sober, what lengths and ideas will you try?

tomsteve

the best thing you could do to find out is read the first 164 pages of the big book to learn what AA is about. you could learn about the underlying problems we all seem to share in some way and the solution the steps gives us. also shows quite a few promises that can occur by working the steps.
AA is about much more than meetings.
you can find the big book to read online.

snitch

AA has saved my life and the 12 steps are giving me tools to live my life sober and , well, so much much more. I am 12 months sober and I could NOT stop drinking. Because of AA, the steps and the fellowship, and my HP, I haven't had to pick up a drink in 12 months. That's a miracle for an alkie like me. Not only that but I am a different person to who I was a year ago. Not only did I have to detox from alcohol, I had to detox from resentment, self seeking, self pity, anger and dishonesty. I have had my ups and downs in AA but I am so glad I kept going back, and that I was open and willing to AA's suggestions. Give it a go for yourself, it cant hurt can it?!

ThatWasTheOldMe

To be honest, I'm an atheist and AA helped me when I was attending (could afford gas to drive there). It would likely help you too given what you typed out in the OP.

fini

"I would like to get some opinions on whether or not AA would be of benefit to me."
dunno.
what are you looking for? so much depends on that.
are you wanting to stop drinking and have not been able to do it despite your best efforts ?

lessgravity

You don't have to go very far to read nightmares about people who continue to drink and drive, spend a little time on this site.

Continuing to choose to drink and drive will only result in your causing harm to yourself and someone else. It's your choice, and a horrible one to continue to make.

Scramm

You're absolutely right and I realize it is a poor choice. It is a choice I have much guilt about.

Mango212

Hi Scramm,

Possibly break this down to baby steps, such as:

1. Look up meeting times and locations.

2. Call the phone number that's listed with the time/location info.

3. Ask a question, or if you get a voicemail then leave a message asking for someone to call you.

4. Listen. Sometimes when caught in fears and new actions, or simply in early recovery, we start thinking too much about what we're going to say. Being open to listening is powerful.

Making an inquiry, information gathering, connecting with someone in person, etc. doesn't mean you have to go to a meeting. Your choice.

Take what helps and leave the rest. Good luck!

Doris47

I have been to AA and for me personally it's not my thing. However for some it's a must. I think you have to find your own way. Whatever it takes my friend😊

Coldfusion

Hi Scramm!

My wife and I quit drinking six years ago, and went to ninety AA meetings in our first ninety days. I still go to meetings but she does not. We feel that AA gave our sobriety a solid foundation.

I hope you go to a meeting soon!

nez

Absolutely. AA is about help not judging. People come into AA because they have a problem with alcohol. Problems have a variety of shapes and forms. People in AA don't want anyone to experience what they went through before they walked into the rooms.

Before I went to my first meeting, I too had questions about fitting in. Better questions to ask myself would have been:
Would I fit into jail? ...because that was in my future
Would I fit into a grave? ...because that is where I was headed
Would I fit into a graveside funeral for a person that my drunken driving killed? ...an ugly very real possibility due to my problem

lessgravity

Guilt can be a good thing, rather than shame, we often properly feel guilty about things. But you can live a life free of that emotional state.

August252015

THAT.

I wrote my first post, what, 9 hr ago?

Well, today I just helped a friend celebrate her one year sober anniversary - and she lost a friend today, too. He didn't stop drinking. rest of the details don't really matter.

Here's the bottom line:
Glad you are here.
You can do this.
Lots of people can help.

But - it's up to you.

Start somehow, keep doing whatever you want besides drinking, and so many questions get answered as your reality and choices change.

Promise.

Gottalife

What launched my recovery ws one on one time with a recovered alcoholic which helped me to really see my problem, and understand the basics of the AA solution. We call it a 12 step call. I learnt more in that time than I would have in a hundred meetings, plus I had a friend to go with me to my first meeting - which was a bigger help than I can say.

When I got to my first meeting, the only thing I remember is that I got a very warm welcome from people who seemed to understand. I knew roughly how a meeting works, and I knew that meetings, though important, were only a part of the AA solution, that there was a whole program of action as well. I dabbled for a couple of weeks, got drunk one more time, then threw myself into the program, sponsor, steps, meetings, prayer and all. And that was when my life began.

Scramm

Thank.you all for sharing your experiences and advice. I am not sure what I am going to do just yet but I may look into it. My wife just made 90 days and is linked up with a sponsor and a network of others through her IOP group. It seems to be helping her a great deal as she is always talking or texting away with them. I admit it would be nice to have a network like that but I am not convinced that I need one

5329guy

I really really liked that.

Purpleman

Yes, this is my experience also. It certainly doesn't hurt to attend a few meetings & see if it works for you. Best wishes

Fly N Buy

Drinking wasn't my problem - it was my solution. I learned how to find different solutions through Honesty, Open-mindedness and Willingness. The program outlined in the autobiographical book entitled Alcoholics Anonymous was integral in taking steps away from drinking. I would not be sober today if it weren't for the program and the wonderful people of SoberRecovery. Very grateful for both, truly.

Find your truth
Best
Fly

nez

Do you only do things that you need to do? I don't need a motorcycle, but am damn glad that I have one...Okay, I lied, I need one :~)

DriGuy

Motivation is important. AA doesn't fix or even claim to fix anyone's problem. It lays out steps to aid an alcoholic in quitting. It was created by a very devout spiritual person, and it encourages alcoholics to develop a relationship with a higher power who can be called upon to help alcoholics find their way to recovery.

If you don't believe in a higher power that intercedes in human affairs, there are still parts of the program that can be productively utilized by a person without such faith. Even the steps can be reworded so that reliance on a higher power is not required. The contact with other alcoholics in recovery was very helpful to me. AA meetings are a different environment than the world outside. Many members are leading years of joyful life in sobriety, and meeting them gave me hope for myself. Having a place to report every night during the peak of my cravings was vital in my case. I went to 90 meetings in 90 days.

For any alcoholic that has reached that critical state of desperation, AA is worth checking out. Many recover without any outside help. I wasn't able to do that. I went to AA because in my small town, there weren't any other options. Most of the program doesn't address my personal needs or my understanding of how the universe works, but there was just enough there to get me over the hump. And when you get sick and tired of drinking yourself silly, you don't have much to lose by going to a couple of AA meetings to decide if it may be worth your time.