Sober but full of resentments
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Join Date: Dec 2012
Location: Oakland
Posts: 561
Sober but full of resentments
Was on a 5 day camping trip with my son's school. I'm 27 days today and the whole trip I was a mass of fear, loneliness and resentment. I kept saying the clear someone told me about an AA meeting which was "God help me be a better ----- (friend, parent, etc)" I think the point was to take the focus off them and put it back on me and what I can do. It helped. It was an amazing trip. we went to the Grand Canyon the most beautiful place on Earth I think.
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Join Date: Jun 2016
Location: Adelaide, Australia
Posts: 28,668
Over time
my resent turned to regret and sadness
my shame to remorse
my guilt and shame to anger
Regret, remorse, sadness and anger are emotions I can use to be that better person- a lifelong work in progress
my resent turned to regret and sadness
my shame to remorse
my guilt and shame to anger
Regret, remorse, sadness and anger are emotions I can use to be that better person- a lifelong work in progress
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Join Date: Oct 2017
Location: uk
Posts: 2,428
Very well done on 27 days. It is a difficult time, a whole overwhelming mass of emotions flowing.
For me it was about learning to feel these uncomfortable feelings, then became less raw and painful, they eased down. I was then able to work through them, making changes I needed to make, putting right what I could.
Hang on in there.
For me it was about learning to feel these uncomfortable feelings, then became less raw and painful, they eased down. I was then able to work through them, making changes I needed to make, putting right what I could.
Hang on in there.
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Join Date: Oct 2013
Posts: 11,426
Great job on staying sober and identifying the emotions--I suggest you work with them--feeling them fully most especially, and that discomfort and pain will start to ebb with some work and processing. Booze numbed it.
Can you do a short course of therapy? If not, try journaling as getting it out there is the most important thing, or was for me.
Can you do a short course of therapy? If not, try journaling as getting it out there is the most important thing, or was for me.
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Join Date: Feb 2017
Location: Right here, right now
Posts: 3,973
Congrats on 27 (now 28) days!
What an amazing trip!
The twelve steps help a lot with resentments and that sentiment you talk about. I don’t go to AA but I do follow the steps and believe in a lot of what AA teaches
Keep going strong!
What an amazing trip!
The twelve steps help a lot with resentments and that sentiment you talk about. I don’t go to AA but I do follow the steps and believe in a lot of what AA teaches
Keep going strong!
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Join Date: Jun 2013
Location: Big City
Posts: 3,895
Resentments, regrets, losses, anxiety, broken hearts, shame, guilt - sobriety doesn't clear up all these things like a sponge on a chalkboard. All the stuff that makes us who we are is still there when we get sober. Sobriety just gives us the eraser and the chalk to start making the changes and doing the work that can heal ourselves and those we have in our lives.
I see my sobriety as merely an unshackling of chains, not a ticket to a life of leisure and ease. I'm free yes - but I'm where I always have been, with myself in my life. And there's work to be done.
I see my sobriety as merely an unshackling of chains, not a ticket to a life of leisure and ease. I'm free yes - but I'm where I always have been, with myself in my life. And there's work to be done.
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Join Date: Apr 2012
Location: northern michigan. not the U.P.
Posts: 15,281
press- its AWESOME to read ya had an amazing trip and NO mention of alcohol-
as for the thread title, the steps will help tremendously with that.the 4th step was an awesome time of discovery for me.
as for the thread title, the steps will help tremendously with that.the 4th step was an awesome time of discovery for me.
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