readyt0change

Hey guys,

4 days in on this attempt and yesterday I was offered a job in a bar. Pretty much barback/bussing tables, general help.

I would like to be a bartender/server and hopefully I can work with my up in a few weeks.

Am I insane for wanting to work in a bar now? I'm 26 with not much skills outside of sales / customer service type roles. I could possibly get a job on a cruise ship which sounds pretty awesome but that's a few weeks away at least and that's if I get it.


I'm not exactly sure what else to do at this point in time outside of working in restaurants/bars...

What do you guys think?

tomsteve

i think you should go back and read past threads/replies of yours.
from a little over a year ago:
I went out to play some pool at my usual spot tonight.

The night started off great. An old friend came by and.. we had a few drinks.

No big deal really except my jacket was stolen. Absolute buzzkill.

Tonight was the final straw. I think this is a sign from the universe to quit the bar life and alcohol once and for all.

So tired of this. Tonight was really disappointing. What a way to add insult to injury.

suki44883

What do you guys think?

I think a bar is the last place you should work.

Anna

I know that I couldn't have remained sober in the early days if I had been working in a bar. I was too vulnerable. I hope that you can find a job that doesn't involve alcohol.

ScottFromWI

What is it about working in a bar that attracts you? The skills needed to work in a restaurant are mostly the same ones you could apply to any sales/customer service position. Retail, telemarketing, customer service..there's lots and lots of options out there.

You asked what we think, so I'll say that working in a bar would not likely be a good choice if sobriety is one of your main goals.

thomas11

I think you'd be better off working at a convenience store or gas station. You go to the barber enough and eventually you'll get a haircut. You go to a bar enough and....you get the picture.

least

I would not recommend working in a bar.

AnvilheadII

I'm 26 with not much skills outside of sales / customer service type roles

well you won't expand your skillset by taking job at a bar!
there are a million other options that do not involve drinking establishments. look for entry level jobs with a trajectory. consider a trade.

Action

I think you could end up being your own worst customer.

doggonecarl

Aim higher than being a bar-back.

This is not to disparage that job, or those who do it. This is about you. There is a theme in your posts, about realizing that drugs and drink have kept you from your potential, feeling sad about your wasted life, and wanting to rebuild it.

You want to rebuild your life? Get clean and sober, set high but achievable goals, then accomplish them. You'll likely start at the bottom of the ladder, but pick a ladder with more than one rung.

readyt0change

I thought making tips and the general atmosphere and the people would be fun for now.

I was thinking to make some money and go back to school. Either acting or something else like business, marketing, etc. I don't wanna work in sales.. Cold calling really weighs me down.

My parents suggested I should work as a security guard for now.

I worked in a bar a couple years ago and I was drinking after the shift as much as I could. :/

When I lose sobriety its like the switch turns back to on and i'm back to seeking. Luckily the last few months I've been mostly sober but still.. I haven't managed more than 97 days in the last year and a half.

ScottFromWI

I think you answered your own question right there with those 2 statement.

As they say, if you keep doing the same thing over and over...don't expect result that are any different, right?

AnvilheadII

suggesting gently that by 26 years of age, we should be looking at a job as more than FUN. it's an art to learn to hold down a job long term and make your own way in the world, adult and self sufficient.

readyt0change

this is what i've struggled with for years. i haven't held a full time job for more than 3 months. either i get fired or quit or something. i have struggled to find my way for years now. always giving up when difficulty hits or something doesn't go my way.

i thought work was supposed to be fun. a passion. every job seems to be a grind. a day to day monotony which i can't handle after a while.

i am so lost.

Anna

I think it's great to have work that you are passionate about. I've had that, and it's awesome. That's not to say work is fun, at least not always. But, if you have a passion in your life and you can find a way to earn money by following that passion, then you'll be happy in your work.

AnvilheadII

who pays your way then, if you aren't gainfully employed?

i hate to break it to you but life is not all fun and games. getting up every day to go to work is a grind, suiting up and showing up. it's part of how our society functions, each person participating. we aren't robots, but we are under no illusion that work = Disneyland.

the world is not here to keep you entertained. it is however waiting for you to find your place and participate fully of your time, talents and treasures. and even those who did find a vocation that they truly loved or enjoyed put in a LOT OF HARD YEARS to get there. we have to EARN it, not wait for it to be handed to us.

ScottFromWI

There are certainly jobs that can be very rewarding and have goals/results that you can be passionate about. That doesn't mean every day is going to be rainbows and unicorns though, they call it work and give you a paycheck for a reason ;-)

So maybe instead looking finding the "perfect" job - start looking at what you can do to help improve your own motivtion to succeed.

And remember that alcohol is a depressant...so you are truly starting out at a disadvantage already by drinking.

readyt0change

i had a drug induced psychosis at age 19. i started to get disability after that. 19-21 were very tough years where i didn't do anything really except dropping in and out of school. slowly crawled out of the depression and was starting to trend in a positive way.

last year i got my first full time job and that's when i lost it. since then i've earned what i could but now i need another job.

D122y

I have used the ugly transformation of a pre drunk drinker into a drunk drinker as a way to stay sober.

There is nothing attractive about drunks to me anymore. Nothing at all.

I would feel guilty as a bartender knowing that I am feeding an addiction. I would probably get fired because i would be telling folks all about the negative effects of booze.

If I was a young person I would finish up a degree in business and get a corporate gig.

Being a stone sober office mate can lead to big success/ money. An MBA opens a lot of doors and being a born again non drinker keeps them open.

Thanks.

tomsteve

the last 10 years i was able to work i worked carpentry-- framing houses,roofing,siding,windows, remods,etc.
some days straight up sucked. some jobs just straight up sucked. looking at it overall,though, i loved what i did.
i didnt go to work to have fun- i went to work to make money. fun was had outside of work.

find an occupation you enjoy,NOT one thats fun.
are you honestly readyt0change?