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So bummed...

Old 04-09-2019, 12:01 PM
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So bummed...

Im so disappointed in myself. I was doing so good. Nothing triggered me...I just totally binged from Thursday until last night. I hadn't drank in 2 weeks and I just drank and drank. I feel awful. Like I have a belly full of alcohol. I almost feel like I do it to see if anyone can tell Ive been drinking. Unfortunately no one can tell. My family has no idea. I can tell that I'm depressed and thats when I binge. I have a girlfriend thats going through the same situation as I am and we reach out to one another. Other than that I feel so lonely. Like Im going through it alone.
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Old 04-09-2019, 12:05 PM
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Hi eachday i know exactly how you feel im lonely too and even when i try to explain to my family they just dont get it and dont think i have a problem, they are actully a big trigger and often offer me alcohol. I feel like im fighting a huge battle on my own
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Old 04-09-2019, 12:24 PM
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I do super good. Then for no reason at all I fall back into the same rut. I talk to my mom and sister about it (they are going through the same problem too). My husband doesn't understand. I have one friend going through it too. Other than that....Its a silent battle. Its awful.
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Old 04-09-2019, 12:27 PM
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Originally Posted by eachdayanewday View Post
Like Im going through it alone.
You don't have to go through recovery alone, unless you choose to. There are recovery programs. You said in an earlier post that you "weren't ready for meetings yet."

How 'bout now?

You can put down the drink, but it isn't going to necessarily make you feel better. Abstinence isn't recovery. You have to learn to live and love the sober life. AA and the 12 steps are one way. There are others.

Please be proactive in your sober journey.
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Old 04-09-2019, 12:30 PM
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You're never alone. You can reach out here anytime. If you feel like drinking, come here and post first. We do understand how hard this is.
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Old 04-09-2019, 12:55 PM
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Today is a hard day....all I want to do is drink. Nothing really triggering me either. I think because I used to be so social and now I'm not so I fill my time with alcohol. I notice when I get depressed I just want to drink. The only time I really don't have any cravings is when I am taking my diazepam.It really helps me. But I don't like taking it. Any advice?
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Old 04-09-2019, 01:21 PM
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Originally Posted by eachdayanewday View Post
Today is a hard day....all I want to do is drink. Nothing really triggering me either. I think because I used to be so social and now I'm not so I fill my time with alcohol. I notice when I get depressed I just want to drink. The only time I really don't have any cravings is when I am taking my diazepam.It really helps me. But I don't like taking it. Any advice?
My advice would be similar to what Carl suggested earlier. There's a distinct difference between just "not drinking" and living sober. If you just quit drinking and don't have any plan for what to do then it's almost a certainly that you'll drink again.

As others have suggested, there are many ways to go about getting sober - some very structured like recovery meetings/rehab, and others revolve around more self-paced/self learned procedures. If you haven't read this link yet I would highly recommend it.

https://www.soberrecovery.com/forums...at-we-did.html (Recovery Programs & What to Expect (What We Did))

One thing that I feel is universal to any method or program of recovery though is acceptance that you simply cannot drink any amount of alcohol without consequence. Doesn't matter how long you stay dry for - all it takes is one drink and you'll be right back where you started. Accepting that is a big thing..but necessary in my opinion.
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Old 04-09-2019, 01:28 PM
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In order to stay sober, you have to want to be sober more than you want to drink.
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Old 04-09-2019, 01:44 PM
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I really plugged myself into this community eachdayanewday. I made myself think about recovery, I posted for help, I posted to others to help them.

It was a lot harder to decide to drink when I was an active participant in the community here

It was my first step into building a sober life I love that everyone here is talking about

D
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Old 04-09-2019, 09:13 PM
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No-one ever knew about me either. Sometimes people still don't believe me that. That's fine. I know.

Time to get back to work on your sobriety!
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