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Old 03-16-2019, 10:52 PM   #1 (permalink)
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Currently drunk


I had a few days of feeling powerful, euphoric, strong.

I all of a sudden felt this overwhelming feeling of loneliness. I went to the gas station and got my stuff.

I am drunk. I am sorry. I am crying. It's different. This time. There are no more excuses. I am sorry to myself.

I tried, I'm hurting too much. I have so much love inside of me, I feel like I could burst.

Even at this point, I feel love.
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Old 03-16-2019, 11:08 PM   #2 (permalink)
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Hang in there! Progress not perfection.. donít beat yourself up. Keep trying! Never give up, you can do this!
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Old 03-16-2019, 11:09 PM   #3 (permalink)
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ĎYouíre my best palí kind of drunk?
Put the bottle down NicLin.
It does no good for nobody.

Sleep it off and dust yourself off.
Try again and follow a plan.
Dee will send you a link.

This alcoholism is a beast, donít underestimate it.
Gather all the tools you can to defeat it.

Best of luck to you
Be kind to yourself
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Old 03-16-2019, 11:19 PM   #4 (permalink)
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Pour it out. Water. Start fresh.

We are all rooting for you!
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Old 03-17-2019, 12:35 AM   #5 (permalink)
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I hear ya.
ive been up and down like a yoyo.
There was something in that 5 days tho?
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Old 03-17-2019, 12:44 AM   #6 (permalink)
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It's normal to feel lonely, o verwhelmed, angry, depressed, anxious and so many other feelings a few days into sobriety. Our brains are all over the place and recalibrating. I promise you it does get better though, we just have to get through it.

Pour the rest away, drink some water, get some sleep and start again tomorrow
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Old 03-17-2019, 12:47 AM   #7 (permalink)
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I'm sorry you drank NicLin - but many of us faltered a time or two.
You can can come back, and come back stronger with what you learned this time.

One of the best tools is to learn to reach out here before its too late - learn to post before you drink.

such a simple act (tho not always easy) but it really can make all the difference

D
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Old 03-17-2019, 12:59 AM   #8 (permalink)
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Hey NicLin. Hang in there and go again, like others have said.

I'm guessing, by your use of "gas" rather than "petrol" that you're probably in the US? A new day has started here for us in the UK. A new day has yet to begin in the US. You've got a fresh new day still ahead!
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Old 03-17-2019, 04:22 AM   #9 (permalink)
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I'm sorry to hear you have relapsed, Nic.

I hope you choose to start again and make it your last first day, ever.
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"Sometimes, I've believed as many as six impossible things before breakfast." - Alice in Wonderland
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Old 03-17-2019, 05:00 AM   #10 (permalink)
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I know after those first few days of not drinking I would start to feel really good. So good, it seemed a drink was In order. Besides, if I could stop,for 5 days straight, i clearly don't have a problem with alcohol, right?

So ask yourself, do you?

There aren't many that have achieved sobriety in one shot. It's all part of he learning process as long as we humble ourselves to learn and admit the destructive hold alcohol has on us.

You came here which is a pretty good indicator. Read some of your posts, they are inspiring. Let them inspire you.

Lots of people here cheering for you. How bout it then?
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Old 03-17-2019, 06:13 AM   #11 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by NicLin View Post
I had a few days of feeling powerful, euphoric, strong.

I all of a sudden felt this overwhelming feeling of loneliness. I went to the gas station and got my stuff.
I think most all of us have been here. What many of us learned from that is that it helps to come here, in that moment, instead of the gas station. It gets easier with time. I hope you dump it out and start again.

-b
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Old 03-17-2019, 08:11 AM   #12 (permalink)
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Been EXACTLY there. Welcome back.
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Old 03-17-2019, 08:50 AM   #13 (permalink)
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I'm sorry for the pain you're feeling, NicLin. I did this same thing, & it made me more determined to get free. I guess I needed further proof that it was poison to me now - there could be no moderation. It would never be fun or relaxing. You can get back on track - we're with you.
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You are so much more than the worst thing you've ever done. Fr. Greg Boyle

A little voice deep inside me said, "Hello, I am here." It was a small voice, & sounded as if it were buried underneath the cushions of my couch. It was my soul...I had forgotten it.

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Old 03-17-2019, 12:30 PM   #14 (permalink)
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Hang in there, we believe in you <3
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Old 03-17-2019, 04:19 PM   #15 (permalink)
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Hoping to hear from you NicLin.

One of the rationalisations I used for a long time was that I was too sensitive to feel things sober. ...

I'm still sensitive, I still feel deeply - but those emotions are in perspective now.

Being sober gives me the opportunity to do something about the world I'm living in, not just feel sad about it

D
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Old 03-17-2019, 05:09 PM   #16 (permalink)
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I was thinking of you, NicLin - as Dee said, hoping to hear from you soon. You're never alone.
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You are so much more than the worst thing you've ever done. Fr. Greg Boyle

A little voice deep inside me said, "Hello, I am here." It was a small voice, & sounded as if it were buried underneath the cushions of my couch. It was my soul...I had forgotten it.

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