Notices

Warm weather makes me have cravings

Old 03-15-2019, 02:32 PM
  # 1 (permalink)  
Member
Thread Starter
 
Suzieq17's Avatar
 
Join Date: Dec 2014
Posts: 424
Warm weather makes me have cravings

I’ve tried to quit 3 times for real. This being my 3rd quit.

I have quit relatively same time each time—January. My longest quit was 6 months, until June. And then, fell off the wagon and didn’t try to quit again for two years. My goal this quit was to stay quit and make it past 6 months, and thru the summer without drinking.

Right now I am almost at 3 months—daylight savings, sun pops out and stays out longer, and it’s flip flop weather—and all I can think about is having a drink.

Need advice. Up until this point, I’ve been strong and not craved a drink. It’s the warmer weather and it’s association to drinking in my world. These cravings are strong. I’m staying sober, posting for support.
Suzieq17 is offline  
Old 03-15-2019, 02:34 PM
  # 2 (permalink)  
bona fido dog-lover
 
least's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2008
Location: SF Bay area, CA
Posts: 99,759
Stay strong! Cravings won't hurt you but drinking might.
least is online now  
Old 03-15-2019, 02:41 PM
  # 3 (permalink)  
Member
 
Ghostlight1's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jun 2013
Location: Atlanta
Posts: 2,872
Everything gave me cravings. Warm weather, cold weather, rain you name it.
I had to commit to sobriety and not worry about the weather or other triggers.
They're going to be here and they're not going anywhere. So I think it's best just to get used to the idea it's going to be warm and make the most of the nice weather instead of picking up a drink.

You've got three moths, and that's great. Please don't let he weather lose it for you.
It's one thing we can't change or have control over so best get used to it.
Ghostlight1 is offline  
Old 03-15-2019, 03:14 PM
  # 4 (permalink)  
Canine Welfare Advocate
 
doggonecarl's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2010
Location: Norfolk, VA
Posts: 10,962
If it's really the warm weather, then make new "sober" associations.
doggonecarl is offline  
Old 03-15-2019, 03:28 PM
  # 5 (permalink)  
Member
 
AnvilheadII's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2013
Location: W Washington
Posts: 11,589
the warm weather doesn't MAKE you want to drink.....as you said above you have learned to associate warm weather with an excuse to drink. part of recovery is learning to pull the fuse on our triggers and associations. see what we connect to drinking.......and then disconnect it. it is essential that we do so.

if you have decided you aren't going to drink, they you are not going to drink. period. nothing can make you, short of being duct taped to a chair with a funnel crammed down your throat. assuming THAT doesn't happen............

you can still enjoy everything about warmer weather....lighter clothes, flip flops, hell going OUTSIDE and not freezing to the porch! you can enjoy the feeling of the sun on your face and skin. absolutely nothing else changes except what type of beverage is in your container. the sun is going to shine regardless.
AnvilheadII is offline  
Old 03-15-2019, 03:30 PM
  # 6 (permalink)  
Forum Leader
 
ScottFromWI's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2012
Location: Wisconsin, USA
Posts: 16,945
3 months is great, congratulations! I had a lot of "firsts" in my first year sober too - first sober Christmas, first sober summer, etc. I drank all day every day so there really wasn't anything specific associated with "cravings" though - pretty much anything could bring on those thoughts.

Thing is though, "cravings" are simply thoughts. How you react to them is entirely up to you. For example, you might get really angry at someone and have an urge to do something rash in return, but you have the choice not to as well. You might also see a commercial on TV that really gives you an urge to rush out and buy a new car, but most people don't. Having an urge to drink is no different - it's just your mind having thought about something - and you know logically that it's a really bad decision to drink...so just just tell yourself that. I mean literally - say it out loud "I don't drink anymore".

As carl mentions you can start making new healthy associations with warm weather too. Go take a walk, get some ice cream, ride a bike, go bird watching, there's literally a million things you can do instead of drinking alcohol. Over time the urges will decrease as you learn new healthy ways to live.
ScottFromWI is offline  
Old 03-15-2019, 03:38 PM
  # 7 (permalink)  
Member
Thread Starter
 
Suzieq17's Avatar
 
Join Date: Dec 2014
Posts: 424
Summer was always a big drug/drinking time for me always. Dead shows when I was younger, bar scene in my 20’s, and then everyday always any reason until 42.

I guess it’s just that I haven’t really been faced with lots of “drinking” situations up until this point. I live in a very active neighborhood where people sit outside on driveways and have a few drinks in the warmer weather, my neighbors are always outside inviting us over for BBQ or drinks, swim parties etc.

I’ve been in the cocoon of my house this winter working on my sobriety. Haven’t been around alcohol. The upcoming situations will be difficult. I’ll either stay sober or pass on the invites. And, I’ll work on making new “warm weather associations”.
Suzieq17 is offline  
Old 03-15-2019, 03:44 PM
  # 8 (permalink)  
Member
 
Join Date: Jan 2018
Posts: 293
Hey Suzie
I am from Ontario Canada so I know what you are going through. This was the hardest time for me to stay sober as well.

Last year at this time I was so frustrated with the winter dragging on. I felt strange and restless. Sunday was especially deadly. Luckily the liquor stores closed at 4pm so I in my early days of sobriety I would white knuckle it until then.

I will be one year sober in May and I just want to let you know that it really does get so much better. Instead of obsessing about alcohol my mind has become engaged in life again. I am able to actually relax and enjoy a good movie when the weather is crummy. I love cooking cozy meals and taking my dogs for walks without the ugly AV telling me that drinking was inevitable and I might as well just give in.
Give yourself small goals like just making it to liquor store closing time and you will find it does get so much better as your mind heals and returns to its natural healthy rhythms.
Gettingcloser is offline  
Old 03-15-2019, 04:01 PM
  # 9 (permalink)  
Member
 
Join Date: Mar 2019
Posts: 96
Would it be more accurate and perhaps powerful to say that what you tell yourself about warm weather....gives you cravings?

Thus really perhaps the external stimulus which seems outside of your realm of control, is stemming from your own perceptions, which could be in fact a relief, as our perceptions though subjective are within our control.

Weather is arbitrary.

Anything you could do to calibrate the lens of your perceptions through which you view warm weather?

We should always be asking ourselves: “Is this something that is, or is not, in my control?”
- Epictetus, Enchiridion

Today I escaped from anxiety. Or no, I discarded it, because it was within me, in my own perceptions — not outside.
- Marcus Aurelius, Meditations
Epictetus is offline  
Old 03-15-2019, 04:05 PM
  # 10 (permalink)  
Administrator
 
Anna's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2003
Location: Dancing in the Light
Posts: 61,469
I'm glad you're determined to make it past 6 months and congratulations on 3 months of sobriety.

This seems like a great opportunity to make some changes to help support your recovery. The good weather is an invitation to get outside and enjoy nature. You could plan walks/hikes, join a softball team, plant a garden that needs your attention. Try to think of outdoor, sunshiney things that will help you stay sober and enjoy life.
Anna is online now  
Old 03-15-2019, 04:30 PM
  # 11 (permalink)  
Administrator
 
Dee74's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,368
Hi Suxie

I live in Australia it's much the same where I live all year round. Early on I ha to fight those rosy daydreams of me and my friends in the sun, genteely drinking laughing and having fun.

IT was never that way at all - or if it was not for long.

Play the tape through to the end as they say - force yourself to remember where that decision to drink has always taken you and will take you again.

Cravings can be worked through - and once you realise that and accept it things will get easier again

https://www.soberrecovery.com/forums...-cravings.html (CarolD's tips for cravings)

D
Dee74 is offline  
Old 03-15-2019, 05:53 PM
  # 12 (permalink)  
Member
 
Join Date: Mar 2017
Posts: 349
Suzie,
My first year was full of lots of firsts, and that pang hit me each time. First fire in the woodstove, holidays, snow, spring, hot summer days, etc. It got easier with time, but I had to experience the “firsts” of that first year because I spent so long drinking my way through them all. You’ve got several months of practice to build on, and each day gets a little easier.

As others have suggested, forming new associations really helped me. I committed to getting back in shape, so the warmer weather was a chance to get outside and do something, anything, other than sit on the couch and drink. I’m a little older than you, and feeling and looking better is such a great motivation to keep going. Well into my second year, I can honestly say that those strong associations are gone, replaced with my “new normal”.

Best wishes,
-bora
boreas is offline  
Old 03-15-2019, 06:49 PM
  # 13 (permalink)  
Member
 
Join Date: Aug 2014
Posts: 1,408
Well I thought I posted something here already but appeatently I didn't hit the submit button.

I'm definitely there with you, Suzie. It was like clockwork. On cue, the sunny long day got me daydreaming about drinking. This is my second go around at sobriety and just like you I made it 6 months last time. I pledged a whole year this time.

I do know this much: I won't be drinking tonight
WaterOx is offline  
Old 03-15-2019, 07:00 PM
  # 14 (permalink)  
Member
 
Chrissy1104's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2019
Location: Northern NJ
Posts: 68
Congratulations on the 3 months! I’m on 14 days. I totally get the warm weather thing. My deck is calling and the AV is telling me how good I’m doing. I don’t have a problem with Alcohol. But yes I do and wine is not my friend. Have you tried a different drink. That’s what I tried tonight! It worked well. I made a yummy non alcoholic drink! Next week I’ll try a different one and put it in a pretty glass and sit on my deck. And the best part is there won’t be a hangover.

You got this!
Chrissy1104 is offline  
Old 03-16-2019, 07:08 PM
  # 15 (permalink)  
Member
 
zoobadger's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2018
Location: Chicago, IL
Posts: 268
I very consciously and deliberately focus on and celebrate each and every moment in my day that is better because of sobriety.

It's amazing how many things, big and little, I have now that were impossible before.

And then, of course, I vividly reflect on all the awful things that I'm free from now. Not least of which is the impending death from liver disease which was a certainty if I didn't stop.

Generally, to stay quit, I need to enjoy sobriety rather than simply living a life of abstinence. So far, it's worked out well for me. Not that I'm immune to relapse, but with every passing month I enjoy sobriety more and more and am, if anything, more acutely fearful of all I have to lose if I start drinking again.
zoobadger is offline  
Old 03-17-2019, 12:25 PM
  # 16 (permalink)  
Member
 
Join Date: Mar 2019
Posts: 175
Wow, this is great, thank you!
Mark
lifewithart is offline  

Currently Active Users Viewing this Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
 
Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are On
Pingbacks are On
Refbacks are Off




All times are GMT -7. The time now is 07:30 PM.