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Old 03-02-2019, 04:33 PM   #1 (permalink)
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Trying this again


Hello everyone,

I have been a member here for about a year, and I have tried to get sober a couple times along the way. Iíve been back on the booze for the last 6 months or so, and I decided last Sunday to give sobriety a try again.

Im 33 years old, wife and 2 kids, with a real good life other than the drinking. Iíve never been a daily drinker, but more of a weekend binger. My main problem is that when I get drunk, I make awful decesions. I am capable of anything while drunk. Using drugs, driving, cheating, spending a ton of money, and staying out all night, are possible when Iím drunk. When I wake up hungover, I am usually horrified of my actions. Iím seriously lucky to still be married, not in jail, or even dead.

As mentioned, Iíve quit many times for 2-3 months, but I always tend to go back. I want this time to be different. I started seeing an alcohol counselor yesterday, and I am going to try AA. Itís been 6 days since my last drink, and I feel pretty good.

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Old 03-02-2019, 04:41 PM   #2 (permalink)
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Six days are awesome, Goodlife!

The combination of AA and SoberRecovery has kept me sober for six years. Keep reading and posting--it works if you work it!

Here's a couple good threads to join:

https://www.soberrecovery.com/forums...ml#post7135379 (Class of February 2019 Support Thread Pt 2)

https://www.soberrecovery.com/forums...ml#post7135601 (24 Hour Recovery Connections Part 434)
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Old 03-02-2019, 04:52 PM   #3 (permalink)
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Welcome back GoodLife

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Old 03-02-2019, 05:58 PM   #4 (permalink)
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I made bad decision drunk, too. And I was drunk for thirty years. That's a lot of bad decisions. So you're not alone.
Great going on seeing a counselor and going to AA. You can't go wrong there. And stick around here for support, too.
Best to you and hope to hear about your progress.
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Old 03-02-2019, 06:41 PM   #5 (permalink)
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Wonderful to have you back, GoodLife. Posting and reading here on a regular basis really helped me. I knew there'd be support & encouragement here any time of day or night. We understand what you're going through like no one else can. Congrats on your 6 days.
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Old 03-02-2019, 07:57 PM   #6 (permalink)
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Very glad you are back. And through the first six days of a really cool sober life.
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Old 03-02-2019, 09:04 PM   #7 (permalink)
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My situation is very similar to yours. I'm on day 42.
Glad you are here.
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Old 03-02-2019, 09:52 PM   #8 (permalink)
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I hope SR can help you get sober for good as it helped me.
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Old 03-03-2019, 07:40 AM   #9 (permalink)
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Thanks everyone... I really need this to stick this time. Iím not worried about drinking in the near future, but more so 3+ months down the line. I have to just keep telling myself ď I can not drink safely ď. I have tried to moderate for many years, and it never works and I always end up in the same bad place. I need to stop for good now, before I do something that I canít bounce back from.
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Old 03-03-2019, 07:54 AM   #10 (permalink)
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Welcome back good life, sounds like you are taking some positive steps to make this time work. It is good to remember why we don't drink - and you will definitely be reminded of that if you participate in AA and the forum here too. Staying in a community of like minded people always helps, whether it be virtual or in person.

Accepting that we cannot drink without consequence is big - glad to hear that you are working on that as well. Long term you can then start working on finding other ways to enjoy yourself or face up to the things that we tried to avoid with alcohol. There's usually some underlying issue whether it be mental health or just behavioral that we need to address too. Quitting drinking of course solves the consequence problem, but it doesn't usually fix the underlying issues. Your counselor will be helpful in identifying those issues.
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Old 03-03-2019, 08:22 AM   #11 (permalink)
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It sounds like this is a great time to stop drinking.

What I mean by that is that you haven't lost anything "big" yet. Like your marriage, your job, your health, access to your kids, freedom from incarceration . . .

The things that you may have lost, like your self respect, and the trust of your wife can be regained over time. At least that was my experience.
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Old 03-03-2019, 08:40 AM   #12 (permalink)
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It sounds like this is a great time to stop drinking.

What I mean by that is that you haven't lost anything "big" yet. Like your marriage, your job, your health, access to your kids, freedom from incarceration . . .

The things that you may have lost, like your self respect, and the trust of your wife can be regained over time. At least that was my experience.
Thanks Zebra... however I am embarrassed to say that I have lost a couple jobs over my career due to stupid things I have done when drunk. When Iím sober I am an honest upstanding citizen. But when drunk, a switch turns and I am capable about anything. Nothing violent, but more so driving, lieing, cheating, and doing basically anything I feel like at the time....

Today is 7 days sober, and Iím starting to feel better after last weekends bender.. I need to keep building on this, and to live by the phrase ď I can not drink safely ď
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Old 03-03-2019, 03:55 PM   #13 (permalink)
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Originally Posted by GoodLife32 View Post
Thanks everyone... I really need this to stick this time. I’m not worried about drinking in the near future, but more so 3+ months down the line. I have to just keep telling myself “ I can not drink safely “. I have tried to moderate for many years, and it never works and I always end up in the same bad place. I need to stop for good now, before I do something that I can’t bounce back from.
The best time to start planning for 3 months is now
Make a recovery action plan today and be insanely well prepared for later

https://www.soberrecovery.com/forums...very-plan.html (What exactly is a recovery plan?)


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Old 03-04-2019, 04:02 AM   #14 (permalink)
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I could have written this as almost identical situation. Weekend binge drinking, respectable mother week days. Weekend comes and drunk on the sofa and hungover making kids breakfast. I've been doing this for 20 years almost half my life!

I'm on day one today.
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Old 03-04-2019, 04:37 AM   #15 (permalink)
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Day 8 today. This is the first Monday morning in a long time that I woke up refreshed and feeling good. Itís amazing how time away from the booze clears the head, and allows you to feel good. Iím feeling strong, and Iím committed to making this last. I keep telling myself, ďI can not safely drinkĒ
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Old 03-04-2019, 04:51 AM   #16 (permalink)
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I could have written this as almost identical situation. Weekend binge drinking, respectable mother week days. Weekend comes and drunk on the sofa and hungover making kids breakfast. I've been doing this for 20 years almost half my life!

I'm on day one today.
lady, you can do this. For me the dread filled hangovers were no longer worth it... my kids are at an age (5 an 2) where they are realizing what is going on, and I donít want them thinking there Dad is a drunk... Iím only 8 days in, but I feel 100x better today than I did last week. Good luck on your journey.
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Old 03-04-2019, 12:56 PM   #17 (permalink)
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Hey GL,

I feel like I could have written this (minus the married part, but was in a committed relationship). I am also 33 and just had 17 months sober.

The things I like the most is that I am there for my little, at any given moment. I am a good mom and I am not out doing things a Mother should not be doing, cheating, scandalous type stuff, etc...
My last drunk, I walked my neighborhood in my panties... Totally classy, huh? -What not to do as a Mother. I mean no one should but I feel as a mom that is a super bad example to lead.

If I can get sober, so can you.
What I did may not work for you.

I got rid of 98% of my "friends" they were all drinking friends anyways, so no harm there just a blessing.
I moved 45 mins away from where I was. New town and no one knows me. Fresh start- I feel I am blessed to have been able to do this.
I was honest with everyone I kept in my life, this was so they wouldn't offer me any alcohol, offer me support and keep me accountable.
If someone had an issue with it, they were out of my life. My life depends on me being sober as well as my son.

I wish you the best!

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Old 03-04-2019, 01:54 PM   #18 (permalink)
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Congrats on 6, but more so, congrats on staying committed to your sobriety. You got this.

Edit: Congrats on 7!
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Old 03-10-2019, 07:49 AM   #19 (permalink)
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Hey Everyone. Iím happy to report that Iím 2 weeks sober as if today. I feel great. Clearheaded, confident, and excited for the future. Iíve been seeing an alcohol counselor which has been helpful, but I still have not tried AA.

Iíve been here many times before, but Iím hoping this time will be different, and I stay sober.

Thanks for all the support.

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Old 03-10-2019, 07:56 AM   #20 (permalink)
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Originally Posted by GoodLife32 View Post
Hey Everyone. Iím happy to report that Iím 2 weeks sober as if today. I feel great. Clearheaded, confident, and excited for the future. Iíve been seeing an alcohol counselor which has been helpful, but I still have not tried AA.

Iíve been here many times before, but Iím hoping this time will be different, and I stay sober.

Thanks for all the support.

What a great thing to read on a sober Sunday morning.

Way to go goodlife. Keep it up and you'll need to change your screen name to Greatlife!
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