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Old 02-28-2019, 12:38 PM   #1 (permalink)
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Difficult week


Saturday and Sunday attended AA meetings which I found overwhelming. Monday drank projectile vomited did not go to work Tuesday. Wednesday drank projectile vomited.

Today forced myself to work felt ill all day. Got home from work tipped the remaining alcohol down the sink and cleaned my bathroom.

Why is life like this for some people? I will keel on trying to get well. This time I will do it on my own. Like lessgravity says no one is coming to save me! Therefore I will save myself!
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Old 02-28-2019, 12:44 PM   #2 (permalink)
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Life is like this if you keep drinking. It's not just you -it's exactly the same for all of us until we decide to stop drinking.

If AA doesn't suit then look into something else that does.
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Old 02-28-2019, 12:45 PM   #3 (permalink)
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No one is coming to save you, that is true. However you don't have to do this alone. There is help and support, but you are the only one who can NOT pick up that drink. That is what lessgravity meant.
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Old 02-28-2019, 12:47 PM   #4 (permalink)
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Life was like that for me until I stopped drinking for good. No one else is coming to save you but you can save yourself.
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Old 02-28-2019, 12:54 PM   #5 (permalink)
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You know, my heart breaks for you, BUT it's time now. You have to take responsibility,stand up an fight HC, your right no-ones coming to save you or me or them. Don't you think we've all been where you are, we are living proof that you can do it, yes I'm early days. You can be too. Just give yourself a chance man, or your going to die. That's the bottom line mate.
Wishing you love,strength and hope HC
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Old 02-28-2019, 12:58 PM   #6 (permalink)
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Well done for tipping it out.

Same here HigherCall how many times how many years stuck in the cycle. Ended up in hospital last time. Get sober then work on staying that way... It is possible to live without it.
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Old 02-28-2019, 01:20 PM   #7 (permalink)
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HC, life is like this for you because you continue to drink. If you stop drinking, you will feel physically and mentally better. And, yes, you have to do the work, but we are here to help. What kind of a plan to you have to stop yourself from drinking today?
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Old 02-28-2019, 01:30 PM   #8 (permalink)
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Today is not the problem Iím too ill to drink and havenít got the mental ability to work out a plan.

the problem will be after 2/3 days sober. This is a real stumbling block for me.

George Bush got sober at 40 through Christianity and vigorous exercise. This I believe has a better chance of success for me.

AA is a very difficult and stressful thing. It works for some people who get obsessed with it and make it their life. For others itís just too stressful.

i want to buy a copy of this baked mind and try that.
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Old 02-28-2019, 01:40 PM   #9 (permalink)
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Rough week indeed, my friend. I have no advice for you. Just have to keep trying. When you want to drink....when you feel you NEED to drink...just don't do it. Get something else to take your mind off it.
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Old 02-28-2019, 01:45 PM   #10 (permalink)
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I think the reason your not having the success you hope for so far is because you are trying to do it on your own. We canít do it alone, running on self will rarely works in the long term. Saving yourself doesnít mean going it alone, it means if the way to stop the craving turning into a drink one night is to reach out to someone or post here first so others can talk you down then you do it.

Saving yourself is about doing whatever it takes, even if it means reaching out, making a plan, getting counselling, exercise. That is how you save yourself xx
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Old 02-28-2019, 01:54 PM   #11 (permalink)
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Ah come on HC - yes I truly believe no one is coming to save me, but I also leaned heavy on SR and other resources to get and stay sober. Wish you posted and checked in before those binges man.
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Old 02-28-2019, 01:59 PM   #12 (permalink)
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Just to add, no-ones coming to save you also doesnít mean your on your own.

It means that no-one is going to knock the drink out of your hand or pour it down the sink for you
No-one is going to pick up your phone and call someone for help and then hand you the phone
No-one is going to refuse to let you buy alcohol
No-one is going to make a plan for you
No-one is going to force you to work that plan
No-one is going to get your trainers and put them on your feet and push you out of the front door to do some exercise

No-one is going to do any of the above for you, you have to do that yourself to save yourself xx
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Old 02-28-2019, 02:16 PM   #13 (permalink)
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Quote:
Why is life like this for some people?
Alcoholically speaking, our life is pretty much dictated by our choices.

Honestly I think if you posted here before you drank, and stopped buying more alcohol, life would be better of you almost instantly.

'But I'm an alcoholic' isn't really a valid excuse especially if you've decided to do this on your own.

Quote:
George Bush got sober at 40 through Christianity and vigorous exercise. This I believe has a better chance of success for me.
I don;t know anything about Dubyas recovery but that sounds pretty attractive right?

there's nothing there about changing your life and no sense of having to make tough decisions, or make sacrifices.

Unfortunately for me, I had to change my life completely and make some very hard decisions and sacrifices to stay sober.

There's nothing wrong with doing it on your own - I did it - with the help of SR - but you need to make 'I will not drink' an absolute unchangeable and unchallenged aim every day, if you want to get anywhere HC.

Even when every cell is your body is crying out for booze and your stomach is screaming and your skin feels like it's on fire - you can't choose drinking.

The buck stops with you - You're responsible for what you ingest...it's rough man...I really advise you to use the support here as much as you can.

I wish you well.

D
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Old 02-28-2019, 02:19 PM   #14 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Highercall View Post
Saturday and Sunday attended AA meetings which I found overwhelming. Monday drank projectile vomited did not go to work Tuesday. Wednesday drank projectile vomited.

Today forced myself to work felt ill all day. Got home from work tipped the remaining alcohol down the sink and cleaned my bathroom.

Why is life like this for some people? I will keel on trying to get well. This time I will do it on my own. Like lessgravity says no one is coming to save me! Therefore I will save myself!
Most people here have had weeks like this. They are awful.

It's hard, HigherCall -- for a lot of reasons. First it's the physical symptoms -- then emotional ones: the anxiety, the fear, the grief over giving up drinking.

Quitting is hard. But so, so worth it.

There is light at the end of this tunnel, HigherCall. But you have to make a decision, fully and completely -- above every other consideration or priority in your life, that you want to stop for good. You can do it.

I'm still early in this journey.

But I used to see quitting drinking as some kind of horrible sacrifice, sobriety was the scary thing, not having my crux -- my escape -- that was scary.

Now it's the opposite. I feel like I've escaped a prison of my own making. I never, ever have to go back. And that is real freedom.
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Old 02-28-2019, 02:26 PM   #15 (permalink)
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have you considered going to a detox facility? that would help getting through that first week. john
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Old 02-28-2019, 02:32 PM   #16 (permalink)
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I say try giving your problem over to God you might just be surprised what else do you have to lose. My sobriety is most definitely a miracle. I do believe that he can save us from the bondage of alcohol. When it gets tough pray for strength and victory over the liquor.
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Old 02-28-2019, 02:32 PM   #17 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Highercall View Post
[left]

It works for some people who get obsessed with it and make it their life.
being obsessed about sobriety gets a person sober no matter how they go about it.

i got obsessed with not dieing, learning who i was, changing, and having a life instead of existing.

HC, take a read in your past threads and see how doing it on your own worked.
heres your first post in your first thread:
I have been vomiting nearly everyday making bad decisions and sufferring severe anxiety the morning after the night before. It's always been a vicious circle of getting drunk bad hangover sober for a day or two and then back to drinking. I am desperate to overcome this.
have you considered rehab yet?
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Old 02-28-2019, 02:34 PM   #18 (permalink)
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Sounds rough.

Sadly, trying the same thing and expecting a different result will keep you in this cycle forever.

I'm curious what field of employment you are in, as you've mentioned nearly every week that you've been unable to go to work.
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Old 02-28-2019, 02:52 PM   #19 (permalink)
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Next time you have the urge to drink, post about it here instead of just giving in. We'll try to talk you out of it. Try that. Can't hurt and might help. Getting sober for good takes work and change but is so worth it.
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Old 02-28-2019, 06:07 PM   #20 (permalink)
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you've mentioned a few times that AA meetings "make" you uncomfortable. can you elaborate a bit?

truly time spent in a treatment facility would be to your benefit. a safe protected time and space away from alcohol, with professionals whose sole mission it is to gift you with tools and techniques to stay sober on the outside. you've mentioned you can' take the time off work, but add up the numbers of days you've missed in the past month, two months, three months.

i suspect there is an element of pride at play here. just remember where you own best efforts are getting you right now. maybe there is another way.......
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