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02-13-2019, 04:55 PM
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#1 (permalink)
| Member
Join Date: Sep 2014 Location: UK
Posts: 43
| I will never drink again
I lied. I hadn't drunk in the last 44 days until today. The thing is ...I read Allan Carr's easyway, and I was convinced I had given up forever, no question, I was disgusted with the posion I used to drink. And it's happened 1 or 2 times before, I had no desire at all to drink, I told all my mates I would never drink, I saw other drinkers as deluded.
And then in the space of 2 hours, I suddenly snapped, all the last 3 months of telling my mates I was never drinking again faded away. I may drink again and forget this brief 3 month period of sobriety, until I overdo it again and then I will never drink again.
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02-13-2019, 05:05 PM
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#2 (permalink)
| Just livin' the dream
Join Date: Apr 2008 Location: Somewhere Out There
Posts: 24,680
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What kind of support do you have, other than posting here? Are you using AA, seeing a therapist, etc., or are you just white knuckling it?
__________________ "So often times it happens that we live our lives in chains and we never even know we have the key."
- The Eagles
"We call them dumb animals, and so they are, for they cannot tell us how they feel, but they do not suffer less because they have no words."
- Anna Sewell |
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02-13-2019, 05:06 PM
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#3 (permalink)
| Administrator
Join Date: Aug 2003 Location: Dancing in the Light
Posts: 50,713
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Andy, I'm sorry that you decided to drink today. What did your recovery program look like? What were you doing daily in order to stay sober? Maybe there is something you could add to your plan to help you stay sober forever.
__________________ And I dont know what the future is holding in store
I dont know where Im going, Im not sure where I've been
There's a spirit that guides me, a light that shines for me
My life is worth the living, I dont need to see the end. John Denver |
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02-13-2019, 05:06 PM
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#4 (permalink)
| Moderator
Join Date: Apr 2007 Location: Australia
Posts: 171,330
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Hi Andy - I'm sorry you drank.
I dunno about you but it wasn't enough to just say it for me. That alone never kept me sober.
I had to work hard to keep that statement true.
Those moments when I suddenly decided to drink I had to fight tooth and nail against the inevitability of that.
I had to remember I was fighting for my life.
If you haven't got an emergency protocol - numbers to call, posts to make, techniques to use - when the autopilot comes upon you, you need one.
Nothing is a fait accompli - unless we let it be.
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02-13-2019, 06:16 PM
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#5 (permalink)
| Canine Welfare Advocate
Join Date: Sep 2010 Location: Norfolk, VA
Posts: 9,865
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Less pronouncements, more commitment.
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02-14-2019, 06:56 AM
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#6 (permalink)
| Member
Join Date: Feb 2019 Location: The Midwest
Posts: 155
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Thanks for posting andy1.
You can still choose to be proud of those three months. That’s three months of healing your body, three months of choosing not to drink.
Use that to remind yourself that you can do it. But a lot like me, you’re gonna need more tools to get you through — a plan for what I call — those “f**k it” moments, where in an instant you convince yourself “it will be fine.” I’m learning more and more that’s the addiction talking... egging you on.
We’ve got a good chain here for February 2018 class — I hope you’ll join in and pick up your journey to sobriety right where you left off!
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02-14-2019, 07:08 AM
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#7 (permalink)
| Member
Join Date: Oct 2017 Location: Texas
Posts: 736
| That’s why I take it one day at a time and work a strong program of recovery. Thanks for sharing this. |
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