Puppypower

I have been doing very well since September. A minor slip over Thanksgiving but then right back on track. A few days ago I went in for my physical and my liver tests came back looking great. Good news right? But all I have been able to think about since I'd that now I can have a beer. I know it's crazy but for some reason I am really struggling since the test came back.

totfit

Just remember that the liver is one of the last things affected. Most are already an empty shell before the liver goes. There is a lot of hell before the liver goes if one that drinks like I do, continued to drink. Might the same apply to you?

biminiblue

I'm thinking there were likely other reasons you quit drinking...try listing those out. Livers are pretty resilient, but like totfit said, there has been other damage and some of it isn't physical.

Pros and cons lists always show me the truth.

jryan19982

Yes the celebration and rewarding yourself with good news or just that you feel fantastic. Yes that is a tough place to get around and I very much so run into those times a few times a month. Ususlly the thought doesnt linger and I just get past it as quickly as it came but other times yeah it lingers.

PurpleKnight

The addiction is a crafty beast . . . "your liver is fine, so why not drink alcohol" . . . the insanity we can tell ourselves at times knows no bounds, but addiction dresses it up, puts a few bows and whistles on it . . .

. . . and after a while the idea looks like the best idea, and this is the kicker, that we ever thought of, the feel good factor that gets the deal over the line . . . as we convince ourself of the justification for our actions . . . as insane as they may be.

Go back and read your older posts . . . what would this person think about going back to that old life?

You can do this . . . stick to your resolve!!

Mandy73

I have engaged in alcoholism on one level or another for decades. I had a couple years sober and also was given good news blood work regarding liver function. This allowed me to believe that maybe my drinking wasn't that bad. Maybe I didn't really have a problem. Maybe I can drink cause honestly my liver is ok so what's a few times going to hurt?
I started drinking again.
It took me almost 10 yrs more of abuse to stop. My health has deteriorated regardless of what my liver function is or isn't. My alcoholism progressed, drank more - more often.
The clean liver test is great , but it's a trap. Don't fool yourself it's so freaking hard to come back again once you let go.
Anyways that was my experience for what it's worth.
Keep on fighting!

Dee74

I always tell people to try and remember it doesn't mean your liver (or your health in general) is invincible...

it just means nothings happened....yet.

the wise strive to keep things that way

D

least

It's not logical to drink because your tests came out good. That's just tempting fate. I hope you won't drink.

Helianthus

This is a gift, you are already doing well with your sobriety and now you know you have a healthy liver you need to keep it that way. You've been given a second chance, embrace it

I do know how you feel though, I had some really good news last week and as soon as it had sunk in, the though of drinking to celebrate flashed through my mind because that's what I used to do. I had ice cream instead and it was yummy.

boreas

PP,
I found that I didn’t have to have health consequences, legal issues, or personal disasters to come to the acceptance that my drinking was out of control and unmanageable. When I look around here, I know that those things were waiting for me had I continued down the path I was on. I am fortunate to have the opportunity to choose a better path, and I won’t waste that gift.

My son is 17. I regret the years spent drinking, but am thankful that my head cleared in time to be fully present for him now. He will soon be grown and gone. For all of my shortcomings as a parent, sobriety was one thing I did right.

Based on my experience, I feel sure that 10 years from now you won’t look back and think, “boy, I sure wish I had spent more time drinking away my son’s childhood”. You have a great opportunity to continue to be a present parent, and a clean bill of health is just another gift you give your child.

Congrats on your sober time, and best wishes.
-bora

Be123

My doctor also told me my last liver test was ok. Good even...RESULT!

I'm not an expert on this sobriety thing but drinking on that good news seems like crossing a very busy and dangerous road and getting across safely...and then choosing to go back across with my eyes shut just to see what the result will be this time

WaterOx

absolutely.....triggered by bad news, triggered by good news, triggered by no news, triggered by being triggered, triggered by not being triggered, triggered because we make up a trigger, triggered because we didn't know about a trigger, triggered by the triggering triggers that trigger them.....

you name it, we can trigger it. You can bet on it

Unshackled

Awesome post. I have to realize to always keep my guard up. The beast is always looking for ways to trick me up.

lessgravity

For me, my kids were leverage against this kind of thinking early on. I know you have a son - the sober person you want to be for him should be enough to shut down the demon whispering these thoughts.

WaterOx

and by the way, I have had numerous blood and scan tests for fear of cirrhosis due to very prominent liver aching. Each time, terrified this was "it" and each time wanting to drink when I heard the good news it came back normal.

So yeah...it kinda happens to the best of us!

woowinnielrrm

Ahhhh yes, the clean liver report. Even if we had no liver, our other organs are greatly affected over time by alcohol abuse. The brain has cells that die off. Women can get breast cancer from drinking. Booze ages us and ruins our skin. Our bodies are depleted of vital nutrients. We get severely dehydrated. The list goes on and on.

TheWayBack

You can do severe damage to yourself while doing little damage to your liver. I know, because I did it. I was very surprised to find out that my liver is apparently 100%. I nearly died from drinking with a perfect liver. There's your heart, kidneys, pancreas, and other assorted ways to do yourself in. I know liver seems to be the most popular demise from drinking, but it's far from the only one.

gettingsmarter

Drinking did a really good number on my brain. There is no doubt damage was done. I'm still paying for it.