Long road to day one
 

Me again, on day one.
I've worked really hard over the last few weeks to learn to stop loving, wanting, and needing to drink. I've eliminated foods that trigger cravings and focused on mindfulness, joy, and gratitude. I've been waiting for the moment that I knew, unequivocally, that both body and mind agreed that I was ready.
I felt that very powerfully last night. I understand why I've struggled so long and I no longer have bitterness or hatred towards myself. I never allowed myself to succeed at anything before, and it's time to fix that, too. I definitely no longer love drinking, and I've worked through hating it. I don't need it anymore, and I don't mourn my relationship with it at ALL.
Sobriety is scary! Thanks to everyone who so patiently shows support to endless day oners like me.
So, off to get some sunshine and fresh air, not skulk to the liquor store and play the whole hide-the-bottle game that my husband and I both know doesn't fool anyone.

Hope this is the start for you.

Welcome!

I sabotaged myself in all areas of my life, too. I didn't think I deserved to succeed or do well at anything. I know how much of a challenge it is to change your thinking, but it's so important for you to believe that you deserve a good life. :)

Hi Lipstuck - we are with you. Stay close & post - it does help with the anxiety in the early days. You're never alone. Be proud of yourself as your journey begins.

Everyone's journey to sobriety started with a day 1. Congrats to you.

Lip,

The av will tell me anything to get me to drink.

Sometimes there is truth mixed with lies in what my emotions tell me.

Bottom line is suffering has been then way through this far.

Thankfully, it is only partial suffering. 99% of the time these days, I live without the crave.

But, that 1% seems longer than it is.

I am fighting a cold these days and am so glad I am doing it without being physically addicted to booze anymore. I have rarely been sick since quitting and when I get sick, it is very minor compared to my drinking days.

Thank God.

Thanks.

Good luck!

Welcome back Lipstuck :)

for em the bottom line was really having an emergency plan for those times I wanted to drink.

As long as I stayed sober I had a much better chance of fixing myself and my life,

I couldn't do either as long as I kept drinking.

D

a new day with new beginnings

Thanks for the kind words, everyone. Having support makes all the difference!