Weekender Thread 18-21 January 2019
Sober-T- Dragon
Join Date: Oct 2016
Location: Manitoba
Posts: 8,760
hugs and support Taooo, Saou and MB said exactly what I was thinking. It maybe hard, but you must look after yourself first. Especially because you yourself are still healing. After fufuling your own needs will you have more to give.
Rant away, if you need to get it off your chest here, we will listen.
Rant away, if you need to get it off your chest here, we will listen.
Walk on
Join Date: Jan 2019
Location: UK
Posts: 68
Thank you everybody. I won't be relapsing because I know that I can't control it and one drink or joint will result in a binge; or a day or 2 of stress trying not to binge followed by a binge.
As for my Dad; I will talk to my Mum tonight and make suggestions. Thank you everybody who replied; sorry for ranting it's honestly not for attention or "poor you", I just don't have any other outlet and don't want to overload my partner.
In positive news; I've been taking my son back down to my boxing club and while my cardiovascular endurance leaves a lot to be desired... I am still sharp and fluid. Maybe a return to sport is on the horizon once my current battle has been won and all cravings/thoughts are gone. Never again.
As for my Dad; I will talk to my Mum tonight and make suggestions. Thank you everybody who replied; sorry for ranting it's honestly not for attention or "poor you", I just don't have any other outlet and don't want to overload my partner.
In positive news; I've been taking my son back down to my boxing club and while my cardiovascular endurance leaves a lot to be desired... I am still sharp and fluid. Maybe a return to sport is on the horizon once my current battle has been won and all cravings/thoughts are gone. Never again.
Member
Join Date: Mar 2014
Posts: 25,373
Keep posting Taooo. You are heard. We stand with you, shoulder to shoulder. Well, in cyberspace. I'm so glad you've decided to remain drug and alcohol free.
Midnight, go ahead and update my documents for employment while you're at it. Although, I'm going to look for something part time, not a career-type thing, so don't worry too much about spellcheck. Or run-on sentences apparently.
Midnight, go ahead and update my documents for employment while you're at it. Although, I'm going to look for something part time, not a career-type thing, so don't worry too much about spellcheck. Or run-on sentences apparently.
Member
Join Date: Feb 2014
Location: East Coast USA
Posts: 120,872
Taooo, do sorry to hear about your Dad. I will join the chorus of agreement with Sao’s and MB sound advice. Stay close and lean on us. We truly care.
Manta, MidnightBlue and Bim - good luck with the job searches. I hope that you all find something you enjoy.
Greetings, Happy Thursday and love to all.
Manta, MidnightBlue and Bim - good luck with the job searches. I hope that you all find something you enjoy.
Greetings, Happy Thursday and love to all.
Sober since October
Join Date: Oct 2012
Location: In the world in my eyes...Somewhere I've never been before...
Posts: 7,355
Originally Posted by saoutchik 
I down't bothur wiv spelchek as I am grate at spellinge.
I am back from my workout, took it easy, slowly getting back to my regular routine.
Ocean Lover!
Join Date: Apr 2018
Location: You know nothing Jon Snow - UK
Posts: 2,604
Gosh, so much activity so I need to catch up but wanted to initially say to Taooo and Tetra to hang in there and keep being strong, you can both do this!!
So the work situation update...so glad I am out of there next week! Had the meeting with the big bosses and I pushed back on a lot of things, said "I am afraid I don't accept that" quite a lot when they were trying to blame things on me that were not my mistakes to take the blame for. It was a very fraught meeting and they sure as hell did not expect me to fight back. They mentioned this getting to the meeting in their eyes late (even though I was 10 minutes early!) and said that I didn't seem to care or be bothered about that which really annoyed them on the day. I pointed out that they called me to arrange a room that they actually didn't need because they didn't read the invite properly which meant I missed my ferry as I had to try and sort a room for them. I pointed out that firstly I was not late, and secondly I would have been there 40 minutes earlier if I had not received this "emergency call" from them that wasn't an actual emergency. "What part in this scenario is my actual fault here?" They didn't like me saying that as they didn't have an answer. I also pointed out that I didn't act stressed by what happened that morning as I do not kick myself over things that are beyond my control. They didn't like that either.
When one of them said "I am really angry with you for not working over the weekend and doing the work that the Project Manager failed to do, you should have done this". This is the point I said that it seems clear to me that this is an untenable situation and it is not going to work for me so I think it is best if we agree do disagree and part company. They didn't think I would do that, they thought they could be unreasonable and I would fall into line. They picked the wrong sober person to mess with lol.
I have learned so much about myself since going to rehab and getting sober, I actually have confidence in my own abilities (most of the time), I like myself and I also have got some self respect back. Before I got sober I would have let this happen to me, ended up working myself into ill health and depression and drank home alone to cope with it all.
There is another big meeting next week, all of a sudden I am really needed lol. If I was so crap at my job then why on earth would they about turn overnight and then claim I am good at what I do and they really need me to be there. They are a joke. I made it clear that I would not be attending that meeting in London as that would be my last day working for them.
Anyhow, enough rambling...MR, Bim, Willow......don't be in too much of a hurry to get a job lol!! They suck xx
So the work situation update...so glad I am out of there next week! Had the meeting with the big bosses and I pushed back on a lot of things, said "I am afraid I don't accept that" quite a lot when they were trying to blame things on me that were not my mistakes to take the blame for. It was a very fraught meeting and they sure as hell did not expect me to fight back. They mentioned this getting to the meeting in their eyes late (even though I was 10 minutes early!) and said that I didn't seem to care or be bothered about that which really annoyed them on the day. I pointed out that they called me to arrange a room that they actually didn't need because they didn't read the invite properly which meant I missed my ferry as I had to try and sort a room for them. I pointed out that firstly I was not late, and secondly I would have been there 40 minutes earlier if I had not received this "emergency call" from them that wasn't an actual emergency. "What part in this scenario is my actual fault here?" They didn't like me saying that as they didn't have an answer. I also pointed out that I didn't act stressed by what happened that morning as I do not kick myself over things that are beyond my control. They didn't like that either.
When one of them said "I am really angry with you for not working over the weekend and doing the work that the Project Manager failed to do, you should have done this". This is the point I said that it seems clear to me that this is an untenable situation and it is not going to work for me so I think it is best if we agree do disagree and part company. They didn't think I would do that, they thought they could be unreasonable and I would fall into line. They picked the wrong sober person to mess with lol.
I have learned so much about myself since going to rehab and getting sober, I actually have confidence in my own abilities (most of the time), I like myself and I also have got some self respect back. Before I got sober I would have let this happen to me, ended up working myself into ill health and depression and drank home alone to cope with it all.
There is another big meeting next week, all of a sudden I am really needed lol. If I was so crap at my job then why on earth would they about turn overnight and then claim I am good at what I do and they really need me to be there. They are a joke. I made it clear that I would not be attending that meeting in London as that would be my last day working for them.
Anyhow, enough rambling...MR, Bim, Willow......don't be in too much of a hurry to get a job lol!! They suck xx
Member
Join Date: May 2018
Posts: 8,762
Hi weekenders 
Way to go Manta, you don’t need to be working with tossers like that! Well done. You’re going to feel so much better out of that situation! Well done, you’re a rock star!
Just like you MB when you got out of that toxic situation at your old work. MB is there something else you can do? Totally different to your previous line of work? Maybe a completely fresh start might be worth thinking about? I don’t know your situation of course, but I’m trying to reinvent myself in a new direction... I don’t want to go back to what I was doing and am working (slowly) towards a new pathway... (well I’m kinda scrabbling through the thick jungle looking for a new pathway actually lol)
Life’s too short to stay where it’s not healthy for us to be. We need to look out for ourselves and look after our health, physically mentally and emotionally and we spend 1/3 of our life at work so we especially need to look out for ourselves there.
Tao I hope your Dad gets some help, Sao had great suggestions, a full medical checkup from a new doctor would be a really good thing. And look after yourself too, as MB said, that’s soooo important.
Tetra, I’ll be you will love living on your own one day, just like the Captain said
It’s Friday morning here. I had a major meltdown Wednesday night, emotionally overwrought and way overtired and overthinking everything... But after a big flood of tears and about 12 hours sleep, yesterday was so much better! And I was actually productive! Researching ideas for future working prospects. To work for myself somehow ! I agree Manta, I don’t really want a job lol.
Bim and MB and Manta, we really should open that coffee shop
Anyway today is going to be a good day
Way to go Manta, you don’t need to be working with tossers like that! Well done. You’re going to feel so much better out of that situation! Well done, you’re a rock star!
Just like you MB when you got out of that toxic situation at your old work. MB is there something else you can do? Totally different to your previous line of work? Maybe a completely fresh start might be worth thinking about? I don’t know your situation of course, but I’m trying to reinvent myself in a new direction... I don’t want to go back to what I was doing and am working (slowly) towards a new pathway... (well I’m kinda scrabbling through the thick jungle looking for a new pathway actually lol)
Life’s too short to stay where it’s not healthy for us to be. We need to look out for ourselves and look after our health, physically mentally and emotionally and we spend 1/3 of our life at work so we especially need to look out for ourselves there.
Tao I hope your Dad gets some help, Sao had great suggestions, a full medical checkup from a new doctor would be a really good thing. And look after yourself too, as MB said, that’s soooo important.
Tetra, I’ll be you will love living on your own one day, just like the Captain said
It’s Friday morning here. I had a major meltdown Wednesday night, emotionally overwrought and way overtired and overthinking everything... But after a big flood of tears and about 12 hours sleep, yesterday was so much better! And I was actually productive! Researching ideas for future working prospects. To work for myself somehow ! I agree Manta, I don’t really want a job lol.
Bim and MB and Manta, we really should open that coffee shop
Anyway today is going to be a good day
Walk on
Join Date: Jan 2019
Location: UK
Posts: 68
Originally Posted by MantaLady
Gosh, so much activity so I need to catch up but wanted to initially say to Taooo and Tetra to hang in there and keep being strong, you can both do this!!
So the work situation update...so glad I am out of there next week! Had the meeting with the big bosses and I pushed back on a lot of things, said "I am afraid I don't accept that" quite a lot when they were trying to blame things on me that were not my mistakes to take the blame for. It was a very fraught meeting and they sure as hell did not expect me to fight back. They mentioned this getting to the meeting in their eyes late (even though I was 10 minutes early!) and said that I didn't seem to care or be bothered about that which really annoyed them on the day. I pointed out that they called me to arrange a room that they actually didn't need because they didn't read the invite properly which meant I missed my ferry as I had to try and sort a room for them. I pointed out that firstly I was not late, and secondly I would have been there 40 minutes earlier if I had not received this "emergency call" from them that wasn't an actual emergency. "What part in this scenario is my actual fault here?" They didn't like me saying that as they didn't have an answer. I also pointed out that I didn't act stressed by what happened that morning as I do not kick myself over things that are beyond my control. They didn't like that either.
When one of them said "I am really angry with you for not working over the weekend and doing the work that the Project Manager failed to do, you should have done this". This is the point I said that it seems clear to me that this is an untenable situation and it is not going to work for me so I think it is best if we agree do disagree and part company. They didn't think I would do that, they thought they could be unreasonable and I would fall into line. They picked the wrong sober person to mess with lol.
I have learned so much about myself since going to rehab and getting sober, I actually have confidence in my own abilities (most of the time), I like myself and I also have got some self respect back. Before I got sober I would have let this happen to me, ended up working myself into ill health and depression and drank home alone to cope with it all.
There is another big meeting next week, all of a sudden I am really needed lol. If I was so crap at my job then why on earth would they about turn overnight and then claim I am good at what I do and they really need me to be there. They are a joke. I made it clear that I would not be attending that meeting in London as that would be my last day working for them.
Anyhow, enough rambling...MR, Bim, Willow......don't be in too much of a hurry to get a job lol!! They suck xx
So the work situation update...so glad I am out of there next week! Had the meeting with the big bosses and I pushed back on a lot of things, said "I am afraid I don't accept that" quite a lot when they were trying to blame things on me that were not my mistakes to take the blame for. It was a very fraught meeting and they sure as hell did not expect me to fight back. They mentioned this getting to the meeting in their eyes late (even though I was 10 minutes early!) and said that I didn't seem to care or be bothered about that which really annoyed them on the day. I pointed out that they called me to arrange a room that they actually didn't need because they didn't read the invite properly which meant I missed my ferry as I had to try and sort a room for them. I pointed out that firstly I was not late, and secondly I would have been there 40 minutes earlier if I had not received this "emergency call" from them that wasn't an actual emergency. "What part in this scenario is my actual fault here?" They didn't like me saying that as they didn't have an answer. I also pointed out that I didn't act stressed by what happened that morning as I do not kick myself over things that are beyond my control. They didn't like that either.
When one of them said "I am really angry with you for not working over the weekend and doing the work that the Project Manager failed to do, you should have done this". This is the point I said that it seems clear to me that this is an untenable situation and it is not going to work for me so I think it is best if we agree do disagree and part company. They didn't think I would do that, they thought they could be unreasonable and I would fall into line. They picked the wrong sober person to mess with lol.
I have learned so much about myself since going to rehab and getting sober, I actually have confidence in my own abilities (most of the time), I like myself and I also have got some self respect back. Before I got sober I would have let this happen to me, ended up working myself into ill health and depression and drank home alone to cope with it all.
There is another big meeting next week, all of a sudden I am really needed lol. If I was so crap at my job then why on earth would they about turn overnight and then claim I am good at what I do and they really need me to be there. They are a joke. I made it clear that I would not be attending that meeting in London as that would be my last day working for them.
Anyhow, enough rambling...MR, Bim, Willow......don't be in too much of a hurry to get a job lol!! They suck xx
Enjoyed reading this; sounds like you smashed it and they got what they deserved. Justice has been served.
Member
Join Date: Oct 2016
Location: South Africa
Posts: 1,536
Way to go go, Manta! The deservantly unapologetic way in which you handled yourself with these people somehow reminded me of a popular bumper sticker years ago that said something along the lines of “How’s my driving? Phone 0860 913 EAT S#@*!”
Member
Join Date: Oct 2016
Location: South Africa
Posts: 1,536
Just as I hinted yesterday at my father’s emotional meltdown and recovery a few years back, my dear mother seems to be experiencing something similar.
In her late 70’s and with previous depression, she drove off yesterday leaving my father’s home at 17:30, not telling anyone. She also left her handbag, wallet and driver’s license behind. She doesn’t carry a phone and her car doesn’t have a tracking device. We drove around for hours looking for her. Extremely worried my father and I ended up filing a missing person’s report, with my wife posted at my father’s home in case she returned.
She eventually arrived back home at close to midnight, in an emotionally distressed state. Today we shall decide on the best way to try and help her get a medical assessment and treatment. She is very reluctant and I am not sure that she will cooperate.
My wife is getting increasingly concerned about the potential slumbering genetic makeup of her husband and I am glad to have the opportunity to vent here, and hope you don’t mind too much.
In her late 70’s and with previous depression, she drove off yesterday leaving my father’s home at 17:30, not telling anyone. She also left her handbag, wallet and driver’s license behind. She doesn’t carry a phone and her car doesn’t have a tracking device. We drove around for hours looking for her. Extremely worried my father and I ended up filing a missing person’s report, with my wife posted at my father’s home in case she returned.
She eventually arrived back home at close to midnight, in an emotionally distressed state. Today we shall decide on the best way to try and help her get a medical assessment and treatment. She is very reluctant and I am not sure that she will cooperate.
My wife is getting increasingly concerned about the potential slumbering genetic makeup of her husband
and I am glad to have the opportunity to vent here, and hope you don’t mind too much.
Sober since October
Join Date: Oct 2012
Location: In the world in my eyes...Somewhere I've never been before...
Posts: 7,355
Morning, weekenders.
I woke up early and couldn't fall back asleep, so decided to get up and make the morning productive. Kind of.
Manta - Wow. You are impressive. So proud of you. I am totally in no hurry to get a job, but my finances (or rather lack of those) push me.
Willow - You've read my mind. I am thinking about a fresh start. My goal is to find a job based on the skills and strength I have rather than following my usual line of work. I am updating my CV right now. And I found it challenging to "brag" about my achievements. My impostor syndrome is having a field day. Managed a major project? Represented my country at the international conference? Ah, it was just a lucky strike.
And I am also brainstorming ideas to work for myself. It's getting harder and harder for me to work for anyone else.
I am in for coffee shop, by the way! A healthy lifestyle coffee shop with lots of delicious coffee, tea and mind-blowing non-alcoholic drinks. We could develop it into a chain of coffee shops later and franchise it to promote a sober lifestyle as a major way to have fun in life.
On a fun side of life. My "not-a-date-boxing-buddy" called yesterday to check on how I am feeling and when he got to know and offered to get together for breakfast today since he is having a day off work.
I probably shouldn't have said "Yes" but I did. And I am so not feeling like having a "let's be friends" conversation.
I am a naughty girl.
I also got a notice that I have a registered letter waiting for me at the post office. Surely banks will give me some grief about my debt. It always gets me anxious but I will handle it.
That's it for now.
See you later)
I woke up early and couldn't fall back asleep, so decided to get up and make the morning productive. Kind of.
Manta - Wow. You are impressive. So proud of you. I am totally in no hurry to get a job, but my finances (or rather lack of those) push me.
Willow - You've read my mind. I am thinking about a fresh start. My goal is to find a job based on the skills and strength I have rather than following my usual line of work. I am updating my CV right now. And I found it challenging to "brag" about my achievements. My impostor syndrome is having a field day. Managed a major project? Represented my country at the international conference? Ah, it was just a lucky strike.
And I am also brainstorming ideas to work for myself. It's getting harder and harder for me to work for anyone else.
I am in for coffee shop, by the way! A healthy lifestyle coffee shop with lots of delicious coffee, tea and mind-blowing non-alcoholic drinks. We could develop it into a chain of coffee shops later and franchise it to promote a sober lifestyle as a major way to have fun in life.
On a fun side of life. My "not-a-date-boxing-buddy" called yesterday to check on how I am feeling and when he got to know and offered to get together for breakfast today since he is having a day off work.
I probably shouldn't have said "Yes" but I did. And I am so not feeling like having a "let's be friends" conversation.
I am a naughty girl.
I also got a notice that I have a registered letter waiting for me at the post office. Surely banks will give me some grief about my debt. It always gets me anxious but I will handle it.
That's it for now.
See you later)
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