AA What To Expect
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Oct 2017
Posts: 75
AA What To Expect
April of 2018 was the last time I posted here. I was on one of my " get sober " trips. I made it about 2 weeks then a beer one Sat night turned into a lot plus a bottle of wine. Was back to daily drinking the next day.
I started lurking again a few months ago as drinking continued to take it's toll in many of the usual ways. 5 days ago I went in my house and went cold turkey. I want to take action this time that might help it stick and for the first time I'm considering AA. Interestingly I'm pretty nervous about getting started and looking for advice on how to begin.
Do I just pick a meeting and show up, should I call someone ahead of time?
How did others get going?
Thanks
I started lurking again a few months ago as drinking continued to take it's toll in many of the usual ways. 5 days ago I went in my house and went cold turkey. I want to take action this time that might help it stick and for the first time I'm considering AA. Interestingly I'm pretty nervous about getting started and looking for advice on how to begin.
Do I just pick a meeting and show up, should I call someone ahead of time?
How did others get going?
Thanks
Member
Join Date: Mar 2014
Posts: 25,373
I went to a womens' only meeting for my first one.
Yeah, just show up. Everyone will be welcoming. It's a little like a friendly get-together with people who talk about how they got or stay sober.
You can talk or not talk as you wish and you can leave at any time. Most meetings are an hour or an hour and a half. There is little structure in some and a lot more structure in others.
I tried a few different meetings, different locations and times have completely different vibes - but the purpose is the same. Don't drink.
Yeah, just show up. Everyone will be welcoming. It's a little like a friendly get-together with people who talk about how they got or stay sober.
You can talk or not talk as you wish and you can leave at any time. Most meetings are an hour or an hour and a half. There is little structure in some and a lot more structure in others.
I tried a few different meetings, different locations and times have completely different vibes - but the purpose is the same. Don't drink.
Member
Join Date: Jul 2017
Posts: 573
Yeah, just go. It's really not a big deal at all. You may want to try a few different meetings. Some are better than others, but if you keep an open mind, you'll glean a little something out of all of them. Just remember, it's not AA that gets you and keeps you sober. It's you. AA only provides tools to help. It's still up to you to use them.
Member
Join Date: Nov 2018
Location: Cornwall
Posts: 60
I've been going to AA for about 6 weeks and trying to do at least 2 meetings a week.
Everyone is friendly and welcoming and non-judgemental, after all we are all there for the same reason - To get and stay sober.
I went to my first meeting with a friend who had just come out of a residential Detox and had attended a meeting whilst she was in hospital.
The easiest way is to look on the AA website and call the number on there, usually it is a central number who will be able to give you the number of a more local meeting. Once you phone the local number they will be able to give you the details of a meeting at a suitable time and location for you and will offer to arrange to have someone meet you outside the venue (or even pick you up somewhere and take you there if you would prefer that) if you would rather not go in alone.
My advice is don't just think about going if you are at the point where you are considering going, you'll be well received and find it a very positive experience listening to the shares of the longer serving member. I honestly never fail to come away with a better outlook on my daily sobriety.
Everyone is friendly and welcoming and non-judgemental, after all we are all there for the same reason - To get and stay sober.
I went to my first meeting with a friend who had just come out of a residential Detox and had attended a meeting whilst she was in hospital.
The easiest way is to look on the AA website and call the number on there, usually it is a central number who will be able to give you the number of a more local meeting. Once you phone the local number they will be able to give you the details of a meeting at a suitable time and location for you and will offer to arrange to have someone meet you outside the venue (or even pick you up somewhere and take you there if you would prefer that) if you would rather not go in alone.
My advice is don't just think about going if you are at the point where you are considering going, you'll be well received and find it a very positive experience listening to the shares of the longer serving member. I honestly never fail to come away with a better outlook on my daily sobriety.
bona fido dog-lover
Join Date: Mar 2008
Location: SF Bay area, CA
Posts: 99,772
Just go and listen. You don't have to say anything. If they ask if it's anyone's first meeting, raise your hand. They usually pass around a sheet of paper for people to write their phone numbers. Good idea to have them in case you need support outside of the meetings. 
Guest
Join Date: Aug 2015
Location: Atlanta
Posts: 8,674
Glad to hear you are back! And going to AA is a good start - it was finally where I got sober.
One more note to what others have said - there are types of meetings and there are codes to tell you what kind they are. O - Open (anyone can attend), Newcomers (self-explanatory), Womens or Mens Only, C- Closed (only members - note: the only requirement for membership is a desire to quit drinking so you can go to these too)....if you aren't sure call the number as suggested, or look for a code key somewhere on the webpage.
I am a very talkative person- and I sat without saying anything for a long time! It's totally ok. I knew that AA was my only option for getting sober so I went, and kept going back - it takes a while for the program to start to sink in so give it a real shot.
Stick with us!
One more note to what others have said - there are types of meetings and there are codes to tell you what kind they are. O - Open (anyone can attend), Newcomers (self-explanatory), Womens or Mens Only, C- Closed (only members - note: the only requirement for membership is a desire to quit drinking so you can go to these too)....if you aren't sure call the number as suggested, or look for a code key somewhere on the webpage.
I am a very talkative person- and I sat without saying anything for a long time! It's totally ok. I knew that AA was my only option for getting sober so I went, and kept going back - it takes a while for the program to start to sink in so give it a real shot.
Stick with us!
No Dogma Please
Join Date: Jul 2017
Location: SoCal
Posts: 2,562
The first time I was at an AA meeting was in rehab. I was about a day or two of my medical detox, and they were having a family night. Those of us without family were herded to an area in the dorms. Someone read the Serenity Prayer and I was like "Holy crap, this is an AA meeting."
There is a really great directory of 12 Step meetings in Los Angeles, where you can filter by fellowship, day and time of week, all female, gay/lesbian, open/closed, etc. I found the AT center that is primarily a LGBTA recovery center, with a number of daily AA meetings, as well as several CA, NA and CMA during the week.
One of my first meetings had a speaker talking about his 10 years of sobriety. He was a straight man, but he got his start at the AT Center. He chose the meeting because he'd narrowed down his choices to those with the letter G next to them, which he thought meant Good!
I am a hugely extroverted person, but I remained pretty quiet at first. Although AA eventually didn't work for me, by the time I'd left at about 90 days sober, I'd led a few meetings, made a number of friends, etc.
You can be as engaged as much as you want, and nobody will judge. If there is a sharing and you don't want to share, just say "Pass" when it's your turn. Or share.
There is a really great directory of 12 Step meetings in Los Angeles, where you can filter by fellowship, day and time of week, all female, gay/lesbian, open/closed, etc. I found the AT center that is primarily a LGBTA recovery center, with a number of daily AA meetings, as well as several CA, NA and CMA during the week.
One of my first meetings had a speaker talking about his 10 years of sobriety. He was a straight man, but he got his start at the AT Center. He chose the meeting because he'd narrowed down his choices to those with the letter G next to them, which he thought meant Good!
I am a hugely extroverted person, but I remained pretty quiet at first. Although AA eventually didn't work for me, by the time I'd left at about 90 days sober, I'd led a few meetings, made a number of friends, etc.
You can be as engaged as much as you want, and nobody will judge. If there is a sharing and you don't want to share, just say "Pass" when it's your turn. Or share.
Administrator
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
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Member
Join Date: Aug 2018
Location: Chicago, IL
Posts: 269
Meetings vary quite a bit from one to the next. So if you attend a meeting that doesn't feel comfortable, try another one.
Also, keep in mind that fellowship and mutual support are crucial pillars of AA so don't worry too much about delving into the 12 steps right away.
I'm six months sober and although AA is a crucial element in my recovery if I don't embrace it with the religious fervor that many do.
Rehab in a treatment facility has also been essential to my recovery. If I'd have realized how accessible help can be I'd have gotten sober sooner. Nearly all health insurance includes coverage for some manner of in-patient and out-patient treatment.
The folks at the rehab facility can help manage insurance along with advice and help regarding a medical leave of absence from work. My experience suggests that taking a break from work and focusing full time on recovery can be a good idea.
Also, keep in mind that fellowship and mutual support are crucial pillars of AA so don't worry too much about delving into the 12 steps right away.
I'm six months sober and although AA is a crucial element in my recovery if I don't embrace it with the religious fervor that many do.
Rehab in a treatment facility has also been essential to my recovery. If I'd have realized how accessible help can be I'd have gotten sober sooner. Nearly all health insurance includes coverage for some manner of in-patient and out-patient treatment.
The folks at the rehab facility can help manage insurance along with advice and help regarding a medical leave of absence from work. My experience suggests that taking a break from work and focusing full time on recovery can be a good idea.
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