i had a spiritual re-awaking
 

Tonight at the AA meeting there was a women there who was sharing but what she had to say was about faith then it hit me that i shouldnt be pagan and i have gave my life to Jesus and i am starting to be honset me myself i have lied about my addctions yes i smoked weed and drank nothing more i have the feelings like i want to use other drugs but thats it
i have to be honest if you want to throw me out the forum i understand
am truly sorry for lying to you all

What a wonderful post. Hopefully God removes the obsession to drink. I will pray for you in your changed life.

Lovely post SerenityRiver. You will be familiar with the chapter 5 reading where it gives some reasons why people do not recover. "They are naturally incapable of grasping and developing a manner of living which demands rigorous honesty"

I remember when I was new that phrase really stuck in my mind and I tried to be as honest as I could, bearing in mind something my sponsor told me about a tendency to confuse honesty with accuracy.

I like this other little passage which i hope will give you some encouragement too.
" If our testimony helps sweep away prejudice, enables you to think honestly, encourages you to search diligently within yourself, then, if you wish, you can join us on the Broad Highway. With this attitude you cannot fail."

Ser,

The mystery of faith. Jesus is in my heart and if I keep my faith in the forefront of everything, life is good.

When I let my demons out, they reek havoc on me and take me towards disaster...e.g. drinking relapse, road rage, crowd rage, family/work issues.

Letting go and learning from the past, living in the present, and preparing but not obsessing for the future, is the way for me to go.

I have been vacationing with a drinking relative for the last week. Anytime there is a reasonable chance to drink..he does. He hasn't bought a bottle, but spends about $15 per drink. He thinks that makes it ok?

He has managed what he thinks is moderate drinking. But, I think he drinks about 5 units a day and this is classified as a daily binge.

I say nothing because I have already said everything to him 5 times. I am not tired of harping. I don't want to ruin his vacation with alcohol related whining.

He is going through withdrawals everyday. He takes meds like he is sick, nyquil and sudafed...on top of rx drugs. It is a pathetic and weak existance, but addiction is like that.

His body is under constant duress. I live by example, and he thinks I have the drinking problem because I quit drinking 4 years ago.

Addiction is a nightmare and we are lucky to have found this forum. Addicts need constant reminders of what is in store from a relapse.

The crave is for life.

Thanks.

D122y - thank you for putting this into the context that you did. I find the similar response to my situation much the same as you. I have to take a few deep breaths or walk away when others offer up judgmental remarks about "my" being alcoholic.

No one is going to judge you here SerenityRiver - I am very glad you're recommitting to recovery tho.

D

Serenity, you know that no one here will judge you. This is always a safe place for you to say what's on your mind. I'm glad you're feeling positive.

Me and my husband have been fighting over the christian forum that is anti lgbt
we are finding thing tough to deal he at the point of leaving me over it
i cant cope because of my ocd he locked it but i keep asking for it to be unlocked am not sure what to do but i want to stay with jesus :c021:

Jesus doesn’t post on that website or any other website for that matter so why do you need to post on that specific website to feel close to him? There are thousands and thousands of other websites you could go to instead, not that you’ll find him their either but you might find some nicer people to chat with.

I hope, SerenityRiver, that you can find another way to stay close to Jesus. That website doesn’t seem to practice Christ’s admonishment “Love one another”.

Have you tried silent, meditative prayer? Ask Jesus to sit beside you and feel His presence.

Feelings are very raw in early recovery.
Try to take yourself to a quiet relaxed place and calm yourself.
Things aren’t as pressing as they seem.
Things will level out eventually.

more fights and now i just dont want to be here i should just die

No, SereniityRiver. You are a good and valuable person. Try not to engage in the fighting.

Can you call your pastor? Or call a Suicide Hotline or get to a crisis center?

http://www.edinburghcrisiscentre.org.uk/wordpress/

http://www.penumbra.org.uk/service-l...crisis-centre/

https://www.samaritans.org/branches/...h-and-lothians

Sobriety is a process, it usually doesn't all happen in a moment.

It's tough, don't beat yourself up if it takes time and multiple attempts.

Keep sharing!

am very sorry i be ok we are talking he calm am calm

I'm glad things have calmed down.

My personal belief is that God doesn't make any duds SerenityRiver.

You're a child of God - just as you are.

You are unique, as we all are.

For someone else to attack you or condemn you on some website because of who you are is not a work of God - it's a work of human bigotry and hate.

Please - love yourself. Accept yourself. Acknowledge your connection to God.

Stop going to that website.
It's not for you.

D

am going cold turkey from the forum try and stay away my husband isnt going to lock it try and stay busy here going to start another thread on this cant stay in this thread