Longlady

I'm back again. I wasn't going to post as I feel embarrassed to keep coming back here but this forum does help. I'm on day one again. Completely fell off the wagon over Xmas and just got it in my head I might as well carry on drinking these past few weeks so last night was the last time. I suppose this is my new year's resolution to quit drinking, I know I need to and over the past six months I've had to do a lot of thinking, go through the stages of denial, acceptance etc but I honestly know I can't be someone that can have just one, I have to finish the bottle. I'm going to sign up for a marathon for six months time to keep me focussed on the training. So hi again and looking forward to 2019 without this chain around my neck.

Dee74

welcome back longlady

Training for a marathon is a great commitment but we've had marathoners here before...just that commitment is sometimes not enough...

What other things would you consider adding to your recovery plan?

D

August252015

SO glad you are here. And 12/30/18 is a great day to make a new start.

I have a friend who had the same Christmas-time-relapse you did. Our program is AA and he came back to tell us what happened- and he voiced the same thing you did: he can't have just one.

I hope you stay with us, add to that recovery plan like Dee suggests, and have a sober life one day after the next that brings you peace and freedom and choices.

wildflower70

Welcome, and congrats on making the best decision of your life! Setting goal is a wonderful idea, and they can certainly help you stay on track. However, a good plan is also needed to get over the hurdles of life, a plan to stay sober when the going gets tough. And it will.....

How to handle stressors without booze
How to escape social situations that jeopardize our sobriety
How to deal with the emotional roller-coaster of the first few months
How to be comfortable in your own skin, and learn to love yourself again
How to live a full and complete life without ever drinking again

Goals+plan=Success!

vinono

Completely relate. I'm starting on Jan 1st for another go, with the goal of total abstinence for a year, but hopefully for good. I too cant have just one, I finish the bottle and drink the next one too. I did manage 4 months this year of sobriety, but as soon as I started again, wham, back on it. I had too many parties, BBQs and engagements for me to feel 100% committed, but am feeling positive for 2019! I also think Dec 30th is a great day to start, ad getting through NYE is a fantastic motivator. Good luck

ReadyAtLast

Hi Longlady,
Welcome back. I can totally relate to you too. Had nearly 2 months leading up to Xmas then drank the week before Xmas and been at it ever since. It's so much worse than last time too. Each time gets worse. Are you going to join a class? I am going to join the Jan 19 class when it opens tomorrow,

Jim1958

Keep trying, many of us have had multiple day ones. You can do it.

Delilah1

Hi Longlady,

Glad you are back. Today is a great day one, and you will have two days under your belt as you kick off 2019. I was in the same place as you three years ago, and in January 1st I will celebrate three years sobriety,

I agree with Dee about the plan. For me in the beginning I really had to have every moment of when I would normally drink planned out. I spent a lot of time reading and posting on SR, the January of 2016 class was my greatest support, after a bit I joined the 24 hour thread, and still check in there daily.

I knew I needed a new outlet so I used journaling, exercise, and mindfulness. Learning to just stop be in the moment and breathe helped me through the initial cravings, and still helps me get through life's difficult moments.

You should join the December of 2018 thread, and when the January of 2019 opens join that one too. Having the support of others in the same place in their recovery really does help.

You can do this, and I'm looking forward to following your journey.

biminiblue

I hope you will make this your last Day One. It can be, ya know?

It's so much better on the sober side - but it took me many months to see that. Keep going, it's worth it.

Numblady

It is not embarrassing to be honest about your struggles. And in my view it would be far worse to stay away for shame than to come here and share what you are dealing with. I hope this site and whatever other supports you build in bring you all the strength you need to make this stick. I did always find it helpful to think about how at the end of the day I really no longer had any interest in “normal” drinking so to pick it back up was just an exercise in futility and would take so much mental energy I’d rather just have a sparkling water. Rooting for you!