5 years - you can, too
waking down
Thread Starter
Join Date: Dec 2013
Posts: 4,641
5 years - you can, too
Five years ago today I took my last drink.
If I can do it you can do it. My party days started in seventh grade, 1974, and lasted just shy of 40 years. I started with weed and alcohol, then coke, acid, PCP, ecstasy, heroin... I did it all. I was even a guinea pig for pharmacy students designing new party drugs like bromo...
It's a miracle I'm alive, and every day is a gift.
A few suggestions that helped me:
I found SR and spent a lot of time here in early sobriety.
Study about recovery. As your head clears you may just rediscover reading.
Meditation and mindfulness - every day throughout the day.
Go to meetings, whatever works, and those with which you connect, like SMART Recovery, AA, NA, Refuge Recovery, and others. When you feel like going to a bar, find a meeting.
Don't let anyone guilt trip you if you don't agree with them. Trust your instincts.
Move. Take the stairs. Don't look for parking close. Force yourself to walk more. Join a gym or take yoga classes.
Develop hobbies even if at first your mind is dull and nothing seems interesting or pleasurable. The dopamine reward system does repair with time.
Study about neuroplasticity; it is your friend. You can rewire your brain. I have and I continue to do so.
Practice patience, emotion regulation, and distress tolerance.
Seek professional help if needed, maybe antidepressants for awhile, or suboxone, or Vivitrol...
Know that you have the power to change paths if you find yourself on the wrong road.
A lapse doesn't have to snowball into a full blown relapse. Just regroup. I lapsed and relapse many times before December, 2013. I realize now that there was no reason to beat myself up about it.
Remember, using is a short term "solution" or pleasure at the cost of long term health and happiness. It's just not worth it.
But mostly, know that life can be and most definitely is better sober. I would have never believed it when I was using. I didn't even believe it six months into sobriety. I figured I was Irish and it was in my DNA to be a buzzhound. I now buzz with gratitude, enthusiasm, excitement.
But perhaps for me the most important thing, sober or not, was to make friends with myself, to make friends with my mind, to accept my thoughts and feelings, and to recognize that "the good ol' days" never really existed. I was battling chaos and trauma. I had to learn to forgive myself as well as others. The drive to erase memories is problematic; rather, allow the memories to be memories, and know they are of the past - soften, soothe, and allow...
Look for the silver linings. The magic in the ordinary. It is a fact that life is a bizarre and fascinating trip. Planet Earth, the galaxy, universe, heck, my dirty little town. Take notice. You are alive! The world is alive! If you're not feeling it, that's okay, but you will if you repeatedly explore, look for the details, walk mindfully and take in the good, the miracle of life...
My mom used to say, "If you're bored you're not using your imagination." Pay attention. Use that imagination. You're not dead yet!
If I can do it you can do it. My party days started in seventh grade, 1974, and lasted just shy of 40 years. I started with weed and alcohol, then coke, acid, PCP, ecstasy, heroin... I did it all. I was even a guinea pig for pharmacy students designing new party drugs like bromo...
It's a miracle I'm alive, and every day is a gift.
A few suggestions that helped me:
I found SR and spent a lot of time here in early sobriety.
Study about recovery. As your head clears you may just rediscover reading.
Meditation and mindfulness - every day throughout the day.
Go to meetings, whatever works, and those with which you connect, like SMART Recovery, AA, NA, Refuge Recovery, and others. When you feel like going to a bar, find a meeting.
Don't let anyone guilt trip you if you don't agree with them. Trust your instincts.
Move. Take the stairs. Don't look for parking close. Force yourself to walk more. Join a gym or take yoga classes.
Develop hobbies even if at first your mind is dull and nothing seems interesting or pleasurable. The dopamine reward system does repair with time.
Study about neuroplasticity; it is your friend. You can rewire your brain. I have and I continue to do so.
Practice patience, emotion regulation, and distress tolerance.
Seek professional help if needed, maybe antidepressants for awhile, or suboxone, or Vivitrol...
Know that you have the power to change paths if you find yourself on the wrong road.
A lapse doesn't have to snowball into a full blown relapse. Just regroup. I lapsed and relapse many times before December, 2013. I realize now that there was no reason to beat myself up about it.
Remember, using is a short term "solution" or pleasure at the cost of long term health and happiness. It's just not worth it.
But mostly, know that life can be and most definitely is better sober. I would have never believed it when I was using. I didn't even believe it six months into sobriety. I figured I was Irish and it was in my DNA to be a buzzhound. I now buzz with gratitude, enthusiasm, excitement.
But perhaps for me the most important thing, sober or not, was to make friends with myself, to make friends with my mind, to accept my thoughts and feelings, and to recognize that "the good ol' days" never really existed. I was battling chaos and trauma. I had to learn to forgive myself as well as others. The drive to erase memories is problematic; rather, allow the memories to be memories, and know they are of the past - soften, soothe, and allow...
Look for the silver linings. The magic in the ordinary. It is a fact that life is a bizarre and fascinating trip. Planet Earth, the galaxy, universe, heck, my dirty little town. Take notice. You are alive! The world is alive! If you're not feeling it, that's okay, but you will if you repeatedly explore, look for the details, walk mindfully and take in the good, the miracle of life...
My mom used to say, "If you're bored you're not using your imagination." Pay attention. Use that imagination. You're not dead yet!
And congrats on five years sober! 
Currently Active Users Viewing this Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
