Coming back was hard, but I'm glad I did
Coming back was hard, but I'm glad I did
Hello all,
I've been lurking for a few days. I'm on day 17 again. Had a very purposeful slip when I thought I had lost the girl, which, I'm afraid has made that loss permanent, indeed. I am very much convinced God put that woman into my life for the purpose of getting me sober. I am also convinced He took her away from me for the same reason. She very much lives her life looking to do the next best right thing, even when that goes against what might be best for her and definitely if the right thing goes against what she wants. I've had to take a good, long, hard and honest look at how I was living my life and it's not a very pretty picture.
But I've also decided that my past doesn't have to control my future. I'm back, and I intend to stay on the path. I can't drink, ever again. And I'm completely at peace with that. Grateful, actually. I feel like I may finally be freeing myself from my demons. And it feels good.
One of the last things she said to me was, "Do you remember who you were before the world decided who you had to be?"
Yeah, honey, I do. And I'm going to become him again.
Day 17 is in the books. What I'm thinking will be my last day 17. Had a great time at IOP tonight. Even after I walked in with a crappy attitude and feeling sorry for myself. The legal issues appear to be working out without it being the end of the world. My job is safe, they're very happy with the work I'm doing. I have a roof over my head and a warm place to sleep tonight, and support that I never even saw when it was staring me in the face.
I have so so much to be thankful for, and I'm grateful that I can see that now. Everyone have a great night, and thank you for continuing to provide the support that this community does so well.
I've been lurking for a few days. I'm on day 17 again. Had a very purposeful slip when I thought I had lost the girl, which, I'm afraid has made that loss permanent, indeed. I am very much convinced God put that woman into my life for the purpose of getting me sober. I am also convinced He took her away from me for the same reason. She very much lives her life looking to do the next best right thing, even when that goes against what might be best for her and definitely if the right thing goes against what she wants. I've had to take a good, long, hard and honest look at how I was living my life and it's not a very pretty picture.
But I've also decided that my past doesn't have to control my future. I'm back, and I intend to stay on the path. I can't drink, ever again. And I'm completely at peace with that. Grateful, actually. I feel like I may finally be freeing myself from my demons. And it feels good.
One of the last things she said to me was, "Do you remember who you were before the world decided who you had to be?"
Yeah, honey, I do. And I'm going to become him again.
Day 17 is in the books. What I'm thinking will be my last day 17. Had a great time at IOP tonight. Even after I walked in with a crappy attitude and feeling sorry for myself. The legal issues appear to be working out without it being the end of the world. My job is safe, they're very happy with the work I'm doing. I have a roof over my head and a warm place to sleep tonight, and support that I never even saw when it was staring me in the face.
I have so so much to be thankful for, and I'm grateful that I can see that now. Everyone have a great night, and thank you for continuing to provide the support that this community does so well.
The Following 9 Users Say Thank You to dafunbra For This Useful Post: | 2ndhandrose (12-21-2018),
BlueWellies (12-21-2018),
Dee74 (12-20-2018),
PinnacleOR (12-21-2018),
Purpleman (12-21-2018),
SnazzyDresser (12-21-2018),
Soberwolf (12-20-2018),
yinzer (12-21-2018),
Zanna (12-20-2018)
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The Following User Says Thank You to Dee74 For This Useful Post: | dafunbra (12-21-2018)
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