Sad
 

Hi All,

I’m really down. My son is having a severe meltdown. There is nothing I can do but just ride the storm. I will not drink. It won’t do any good. It will only make everything worse. I will just wait it out. This too shall pass. Tomorrow is a new day. One day at a time. One breath at a time. I have no control over this. I am powerless. I have power over my thoughts and actions though.

Wow, this is tough.

Thanks for being here.

I'm sorry about your son and the stress it is causing you. You've done the right thing by posting here. You already know that drinking will not help matters (and will likely only worsen them). In trying times, you must continue to be steady -- like a rock.

It will pass, you are correct. And you will be thankful for staying strong.

:hug: I am sorry your son can be a source of stress. :( I will keep you in my prayers for peace of mind. :hug:

I'm sorry- I know it's tough but you're not alone Fearlessat50 :grouphug:

D

Fearless - I know you posted before that your kiddo is on the autism spectrum. I certainly dont know the specific challanges you face raising an aspie child but I do know you are 100% right that drinking would make the situation much worse, not better.

Posting here is a fantastic resource for all issues concerning sobriety and recovery. You also have the unique situation of raising an aspie child. Do you have access to support for parents that are raising children on the autism spectrum?

I hope this post makes sense. I dont have any idea what I'm talking about when it comes to autism. I was just thinking there may be support groups or experts you could reach out to that do know what they are talking about.

Thanks R2q! There is a support group in our area and it does help to stay connected with these parents. Sometimes, though, it feels like parents of spectrum kids get caught up with comparing diagnosis and severity. Those of us with children on the higher functioning side sometimes get comments suggesting we don’t have any right to feel bad because at least our son isn’t like so and so’s kid who has severe autism and also epilepsy or what have you. I know that objectively this is correct and it is important to keep perspective. Emotionally, though, it doesn’t make me feel better or supported. We have other support systems as well, like therapy, and use all the resources available to us.

What I love about SR is that even though we all have different stressors and challenges, we are all here supporting each other in staying sober. There is no judgment here at all. I never feel like there are people evaluating me or dismissing my feelings when I come here. That helps me so much even if folks don’t relate to my specific situation.

Thank you :thanks

I'm sorry to hear that your son, and you, are having a tough day. I'm so glad that you have a lot of resources and are making use of them.

Hang in there, support to you. The most wonderful cliche is one you said "this too shall pass".

Fearless - that sucks that some of the folks in your support group are not giving you the support you need because your child may be more on the high functioning side.

Parenting is challanging in the best of circumstances. I have two little ones and I am extremely fortunate to have a large support system to help me raise these rugrats. I am praying for you and your son.

I also am glad that SR is helpful for you. Non judgmental folks for sure. I have probably read thousands of posts. Every post is to support another human being they have never met, to strive towards our common goal of sobriety.

I have found your posts very helpful. I am only on day 51 but knowing that you have had continued sobriety for almost 2 years inspires me.

Hey Fearless, Just came across this post of yours. The meltdown is over at this point (at least that one) and you made it through that hard time. You are strong and will continue to be strong for your son. Each day, each moment, will go by. Continue to help him as best you can. Hopefully, as he grows older he will learn strategies to help him to deal.
So much easier said than done, but try and get to a place where you can distance yourself from the meltdown and not get sucked in to the drama of it all. At some point it will pass. You are a good, strong, reasonable mother. He will make it through the trials he has.
Be good to yourself. Take big, deep breaths and repeat in your head that "This too shall pass. In time, all will be well."
You are in my thoughts.

My prayers for you and your son.

So true. Learning to distance myself emotionally to protect myself while at same time being there emotionally for him is difficult. It’s a balance. I sometimes need to just leave and go for a walk. My husband has been great about this. My therapist reminds me that I cannot allow my sense of peace and wellbeing to be dependent on anything or anyone else, even my son. I know he’s right and the more I train my brain this way, the more calm and objective and proactive I can be in any situation. I know it’s important for my son to see me handle things calmly which requires me staying sober :). Thank you.