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Old 10-07-2018, 09:39 AM
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Hello

Good morning everyone,

This is actually my second time joining SR. It's been a few years since I have been here though.
Once again, I have hit rock bottom and I actually might lose my job over it this time.
I got drunk last night and woke up to see that I had text messaged a few co-workers and what I said to these people was not pleasant.
I am truly ashamed and mortified.
I honestly don't even have any idea why I chose these people to text. I did text them this morning to apologize for my behavior, but really...I don't know that it much matters.
I decided this morning that enough is enough. I can't live like this and I hate that I hurt people that I care about, so here I am.

Thanks for taking the time to read this.

~Pacheeky
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Old 10-07-2018, 09:42 AM
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Welcome back! Glad you are here for support!
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Old 10-07-2018, 09:47 AM
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Thank you. I'm happy to be back.
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Old 10-07-2018, 10:25 AM
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Welcome back, Pacheeky. Nice to meet you.
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Old 10-07-2018, 10:27 AM
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Thank you, SoberLeigh. It's nice to meet you as well. The anxiety is strong today so I think I will just stay on SR for the remainder of it,
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Old 10-07-2018, 10:29 AM
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Staying close to us is a great idea. We truly care.

Try some deep breathing for the anxiety. Maybe a warm/hot bath, too.

Drink plenty of water; hydration is so important.
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Old 10-07-2018, 10:31 AM
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Welcome back! I hope this time you can get sober for good.
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Old 10-07-2018, 10:34 AM
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Thank you for that. It was because of nice people like you, for being my reason to come back. I was sober for a long time thanks to the people here on SR. I will get there again.
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Old 10-07-2018, 10:35 AM
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least! It has been a very long time! I'm glad you are still here.
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Old 10-07-2018, 01:39 PM
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I can certainly relate Pacheeky. I have a habit of sending drunken texts too. Sometimes I can be mean but mostly I send texts where I just make sh*t up out of the blue for no reason. I got rid of all social media and contacts on my phone so if I do end up drunk, I don't send nonsense drivel to people. Smartphones and alcohol are a bad mix.....
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Old 10-07-2018, 02:17 PM
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I truly believe smartphones are the worst inventions for people who drink. I also got rid off all social media on my phone, but then I would get drunk, download them again and I'm sure you know the rest. Thank you for telling me that. It helps more than you can know.
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Old 10-07-2018, 02:52 PM
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Great to see you, Pacheeky! You sound ready to get free.

I also did out-of-character & reckless things under the influence. It took me a long time to realize that it turned me into someone I didn't even recognize. I never knew what would happen once it was in my system. I had to stop all together in order to stay safe and sane. You can do it!
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Old 10-07-2018, 03:33 PM
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Thank you, Hevyn. I am so ready to break free of this. I know it's a rough road ahead, been down it many times. I just need to find a new direction to go this time.
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Old 10-08-2018, 12:29 PM
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Best of luck hunni I wish you well
You can do this
We've all been there done that
Don't be to hard on yourself
Big hugs
Cara x
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Old 10-08-2018, 12:42 PM
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Originally Posted by Pacheeky View Post
I truly believe smartphones are the worst inventions for people who drink. I also got rid off all social media on my phone, but then I would get drunk, download them again and I'm sure you know the rest. Thank you for telling me that. It helps more than you can know.
This made me laugh because I have also re-installed social media apps when I am drunk. I guess the reason I deleted them in the first place doesn't seem to matter anymore after a few drinks. Still, it helps not having them on my phone. I haven't used Tinder or Facebook since
June and I drank all summer.
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Old 10-08-2018, 02:37 PM
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I'm glad I could get you to laugh Wastinglife.

Unfortunately, the things I have mentioned above are nothing but minor incidents throughout my drinking career. I am however proud of the fact that I have never downloaded the tinder app. I'm still not exactly sure how that works, but I never did do relationships well so that is one thing to be grateful for.

I'm here at work right now and nothing has happened or been said by anyone yet about Saturday nights drunken text messages, so keeping my fingers crossed. The stress of this is ridiculous. Hope for the best and expect the worse, I suppose.
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Old 10-08-2018, 03:42 PM
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Welcome back!

Smartphones + recovery = ?



I've gone through phases of turning off my phone, especially for extended camping time, which I find very grounding and healing. I also have used Instagram to post photos of things I like, which really helps me, even being selective and taking a few photos of good food or scenery.

I find certain game apps to be very beneficial in helping me sit still and focus on one thing. It can be a type of meditative distraction, if I'm in a good mind frame.
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Old 10-08-2018, 03:56 PM
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Thanks Mango,

I don't do instagram either but am a huge fan of Pinterest. I love all the animals, recipes and gardening ideas.
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Old 10-08-2018, 05:33 PM
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Welcome back Pacheeky

D
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Old 10-08-2018, 09:37 PM
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Thanks, Dee.
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