Day 89
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Aug 2018
Posts: 409
Day 89
Hello everyone,
I have been reading here daily and very much appreciate hearing the experiences of others.
Today is day 89 for me and I went through many weeks of anxiety and self doubt.
Coping with my new found sensitivity to the world and raw emotions has been tough.
I am finding the need to disengage from some activities/situations I committed to previously because all the sudden they no longer feel right.
This is not due to these situations triggering drinking, it's like my drinking made them seem better/more fulfilling than they actually are.
I rarely drank in public but was a home drinker and it got to the point of a bottle or more of wine a night for years.
I am feeling guilty for making these commitments that I now need to
change.
Has anyone else experienced this?
Thanks in advance
I have been reading here daily and very much appreciate hearing the experiences of others.
Today is day 89 for me and I went through many weeks of anxiety and self doubt.
Coping with my new found sensitivity to the world and raw emotions has been tough.
I am finding the need to disengage from some activities/situations I committed to previously because all the sudden they no longer feel right.
This is not due to these situations triggering drinking, it's like my drinking made them seem better/more fulfilling than they actually are.
I rarely drank in public but was a home drinker and it got to the point of a bottle or more of wine a night for years.
I am feeling guilty for making these commitments that I now need to
change.
Has anyone else experienced this?
Thanks in advance
Member
Join Date: Jun 2017
Location: UK
Posts: 547
Congrats on 89 days melski.
You do get more comfortable with making those difficult decisions as the time moves on. I'm just over a year sober and in those early days I was worried about other people's opinions far too much and didn't feel at all comfortable with making different choices to theirs.
Like you I was a secretive drinker and that pretty much confirms that we are really bothered by what other people think.
Fast forward a year and I now have the confidence to go in a different direction to others if need be but be prepared to lose those friends who can't do activities without drinking. I don't miss those friends at all.
You do get more comfortable with making those difficult decisions as the time moves on. I'm just over a year sober and in those early days I was worried about other people's opinions far too much and didn't feel at all comfortable with making different choices to theirs.
Like you I was a secretive drinker and that pretty much confirms that we are really bothered by what other people think.
Fast forward a year and I now have the confidence to go in a different direction to others if need be but be prepared to lose those friends who can't do activities without drinking. I don't miss those friends at all.
Guest
Join Date: Aug 2015
Location: Atlanta
Posts: 8,674
Welcome and congrats on this milestone! I totally understand what you describe in self discovery. Letting go of what I had been considering fun., and even lifelong ideas like how (only) extroverted I am was a process and sometimes (on that latter part since the "fun" of drinking quickly became obvious as totally wrong!) strange journey.
In two and a half years and change, I have kept discovering and importantly, being able to choose who I am and what I want to do- also learning to accept my flaws along with my preferences.
Keep going. Life is so much better sober as you already see, and it keeps growing.
In two and a half years and change, I have kept discovering and importantly, being able to choose who I am and what I want to do- also learning to accept my flaws along with my preferences.
Keep going. Life is so much better sober as you already see, and it keeps growing.
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