DavidLee

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Hello. My name is David and I am new here. I am 34 and have been sober almost 2 years. It really has been difficult at times because of my age. All of my friends go out on the weekends and have fun at clubs. I really feel left-out and miss going out. I see no sense in going out if Im not drinking. I am
really having a tough time dealing with this and time that has passed hasn't made it any better. Can anyone offer any insight or has anyone gone through this and can offer some advice??I know I had a problem when I was drinking
everyday when I woke up in the morning. A history of depression with
medications complicates my situation even more. Thanks.

Anna

Hi David and welcome to SR.

Congratulations on your 2 years sober. I've been sober just over 4 years and I find I'm still learning every day. One thing I found is that stopping drinking is only the beginning of being sober. There are lots of other changes that need to happen. I had to do different things during the times when I had been drinking. And, I made a lot of changes in my friendships. I had to stop seeing people who were negative and find new friendships with positive people. I had to learn to pay attention to my needs and not always put others first. Have you made changes, started new activities or made new friends?

I hope you keep visiting because you'll find lots of inspiration here.

Love, Anna

DavidLee

Thanks for responding. I have made alot of changes in my life since I got sober but at the same time my life has become very dull. When i used to go out on the weekends I used to socialize quite a bit but now I do absolutly
nothing. I really miss going out but I know It wont make me happier. I feel like a recluse now because I dont hardly go anywhere. I dont hang out with my old friends but they do call me to go out and I feel like I cant. I just want
to be happy in my soberness but its not happening. I guess I have underlying problems. Also on anti-depressants now so drinking really isnt a option at this point.

exlibris

Hello David!

I know what you're talking about. When I was in my early 30's I moved to Denver. I was actively drinking at time - and HOW! - but stopped.

Everyone I knew drank. So I stayed in - went to alot of AA meetings though - but gradually started finding people who didn't drink.
I was shocked! What did they do with all the time?!!!

I love reading, so I checked around and found reading clubs. I like hiking, so I went found hiking clubs.

The point is that I found that sobriety is work. There are so, so many people who don't drink and do things. You just have look to find them.

And by the way, two years is fantastic!

DavidLee

Thanks for the advice. I guess sobriety is alot of work. I was really sick before I finally went to Detox and then to inpatient. I use those memories to detour my thoughts of using. I dont want to be 40 years old sitting at a bar.
Thanks