SoberRecovery : Alcoholism Drug Addiction Help and Information

Today I celebrate 1,000 days of sobriety! Quadruple digits, baby! Hoorah!

Here are some thoughts that I’d like to pass along.

1. Don’t Ever Quit Trying

When I awoke on December 7, 2015, the idea that it would be the last day that I consumed alcohol was inconceivable to me. But over a lengthy period I had spun a very tangled web of deception in order to maintain my abuse of alcohol and I finally got myself caught in that web. By mid-day, I was confronted with a choice: lose the woman that I love forever or admit my addiction and seek help. I chose correctly and that was the last day that I will ever consume alcohol. December 8, 2015 was my first day of sobriety.

I wish I had made my choice earlier, but I’m glad that I didn’t wait any longer. If you have become addicted to alcohol, today is the day to take whatever steps are necessary for you to quit. The elevator only goes down. The bottom is death. Some people choose to get off at various floors, some higher and some lower. Some never make that choice and they die. It really is that simple.

There has not been a single day that I regret quitting. Not one. My life continues to have its ups and downs, but it is a wonderful and beautiful thing to not be dragged down by the anchor of addiction. With recovery comes a sense of freedom that I cherish every day.
You will not regret sobriety.

As you read this today, you might be in the same place that I was on December 7, 2015: addicted, discouraged, stressed, sad, disappointed, but resigned to the continuation of the addiction because it is completely inconceivable to quit. My message to you: Quit. Find a way, no matter how hard, no matter the sacrifice, no matter the cost. You will not regret it. Don’t worry about tomorrow or next week or the impossible-to-envision idea of quitting forever. Just worry about today, right now, this moment.

2. Do it Your Way, But Include a Written Recovery Plan

I don’t believe that there is any one proper way to recover. In my opinion, the most important aspect of a plan is that it is a plan that the recovering addict believes in and plays a significant role in developing. I also believe that the likelihood of success is greatly improved if the plan is articulated in writing. There are great threads on this board regarding recovery plans.

3. Change

We hold ourselves back. We fear change. We naturally become comfortable with the status quo. We fall into a societal belief that we can’t really change. We claim that we want to alter our lives, but we don’t take the small steps necessary to do it and then we use that failure to reinforce our belief that we can’t change. We rationalize our inability to change. We justify our struggles based upon genetics or predisposition or domestication.

Big changes are not only possible, they become probable if we let go of these misconceptions, make a plan to achieve them, and take the small steps that lead to these big changes. Looking back, my unwillingness to embrace change played a big part in my addiction. It’s crazy, because for years I knew that I was going down a path that would inevitably lead to my own destruction, but rather than take meaningful steps to address this issue I just continued to plod my way downward.

Embrace change! Let go of the idea that you cannot change. It’s rubbish.

One more thing about change and addiction. Through recovery, we see that big changes are possible. We prove to ourselves that we aren’t destined to a life of misery. And we can apply that to other areas of our life. I am unchained from the concept that I cannot or should not make other big changes in my life, even if that entails some amount of risk and some unknowns. My post-addiction story is only in its infancy, but I am striving to accomplish things that I never would have conceived of during my drinking days. These are big dreams. I may well fall short, but it won’t be because I held myself back or was fearful of change.

4. Exercise

Any post I ever make about recovery will be lacking if I fail to mention exercise. I would never have gotten or stayed sober without exercise. The positive connection between exercise and mental health is unmistakable. Alcohol, among other things, became my medicine for controlling and addressing both positive and negative emotions, stress, and excess energy. I now turn primarily to physical exercise for those purposes and it serves me well.

5. Our Past is Our Strength

People on this forum have a profound understanding of the damage and despair that is associated with addiction. For most, the struggle of overcoming addiction will be the hardest thing you ever do. During addiction and in early recovery, the focus is rightfully on just how bad things are and how much worse they can become. But over time, this tremendous struggle can serve as one of your greatest strengths.

My history of addiction motivates me every day. Having come so close to destroying everything in my life that is important to me, I now want to see how high I can build those same things up. I don’t want to settle. I want to be passionate about the things and people that I love.

My history of addiction serves me in those times when I am faced with tremendous stress and pressure; I know that I have already faced the greatest adversity of my life and won; nothing else that I face can be as difficult. Bring it on!

6. Addiction Will Not Define Me

Neither my addiction nor my recovery will define my life. I am a complex person and my life has been filled with many accomplishments, plenty of failures, and lots of interesting experiences. Addiction and recovery are part of that. I have no shame and no embarrassment about my addiction. But addiction took enough from me; I will not allow it to be the defining aspect of my life.

7. An Opportunity to be Great

On December 7, 2015, my life was destined for destruction. One day later, it reversed course. A thousand days later, my upward trajectory continues. I’m far from perfect and my life has its ups and downs. But I’m free from addiction and that’s a huge thing. I’ve given myself a fighting chance to be great. I’m imperfect, I’m flawed, I’m sometimes lazy and rude and sad. But when I wake up in the morning, I know that the focus of my day will not be on engaging in an activity that sabotages my very happiness. I’ve given myself a chance to be great. And that means, on most days, I wake up happy.

Thanks for reading. Good luck to you.