I am leaving tomorrow for a 28 day program, advice please
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Dec 2011
Posts: 1,226
I am leaving tomorrow for a 28 day program, advice please
I relapsed last month after a long stretch of sobriety. I am going to the Ashley Treatment Center (formally known as Father Martin's.)
I have not visited this forum, out of shame, and because I was/am drinking. My ask of people here, is if anyone has been to this rehab, and if so, what was there experience.
Leaving my family for almost a month is breaking my heart. School just started. I will not be allowed any electronic devices, phones, or books. Simply a journal. I can get behind that, as I will enjoy not being tethered to a device. I am a political writer, and for those in the US, it will be a reprieve to leave the crazy I have to report on.
Advice on how to prepare would be great. I have leaned on this community many times, and attribute my sobriety (short lived) to this place. Thank you.
I have not visited this forum, out of shame, and because I was/am drinking. My ask of people here, is if anyone has been to this rehab, and if so, what was there experience.
Leaving my family for almost a month is breaking my heart. School just started. I will not be allowed any electronic devices, phones, or books. Simply a journal. I can get behind that, as I will enjoy not being tethered to a device. I am a political writer, and for those in the US, it will be a reprieve to leave the crazy I have to report on.
Advice on how to prepare would be great. I have leaned on this community many times, and attribute my sobriety (short lived) to this place. Thank you.
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Dec 2011
Posts: 1,226
Thank you DreamCatcher. I will be totally honest. It is one of my best attributes almost to a fault.
I am a two time rape survivor, and never told anyone until I started working with a therapist who asked me about trauma. I told her everything, and ironically it sent me back to drinking, not healing. I just wasn't ready to open all that up. If you ask me something, I won't lie. But I won't share either.
This rehab treats people like me who have experienced trauma, which can escalate or trigger using behaviors.
This is a slight ramble, but I won't be here as of 9 am tomorrow, and it is helpful to write things before I have to say them out loud.
I am a two time rape survivor, and never told anyone until I started working with a therapist who asked me about trauma. I told her everything, and ironically it sent me back to drinking, not healing. I just wasn't ready to open all that up. If you ask me something, I won't lie. But I won't share either.
This rehab treats people like me who have experienced trauma, which can escalate or trigger using behaviors.
This is a slight ramble, but I won't be here as of 9 am tomorrow, and it is helpful to write things before I have to say them out loud.
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Dec 2011
Posts: 1,226
Originally Posted by doggonecarl 
I have only one bit of advice...embrace the opportunity. You've been struggling too long at this. Let this be the turning point.
When you're out, let us know how you are doing.
When you're out, let us know how you are doing.
Signed,
Fellow Norfolkian
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Join Date: Jun 2013
Location: Big City
Posts: 3,895
I'm sorry to hear you started to drink again Change. I have followed your threads for a long time. But it's great you are embracing this opportunity.
Sending you good thoughts and wish you all the best. Let us know how it goes when you return.
Sending you good thoughts and wish you all the best. Let us know how it goes when you return.
Member
Join Date: Oct 2017
Location: Minnesota, USA
Posts: 1,468
Originally Posted by Change4good
Thank you DreamCatcher. I will be totally honest. It is one of my best attributes almost to a fault.
I am a two time rape survivor, and never told anyone until I started working with a therapist who asked me about trauma. I told her everything, and ironically it sent me back to drinking, not healing. I just wasn't ready to open all that up. If you ask me something, I won't lie. But I won't share either.
This rehab treats people like me who have experienced trauma, which can escalate or trigger using behaviors.
This is a slight ramble, but I won't be here as of 9 am tomorrow, and it is helpful to write things before I have to say them out loud.
I am a two time rape survivor, and never told anyone until I started working with a therapist who asked me about trauma. I told her everything, and ironically it sent me back to drinking, not healing. I just wasn't ready to open all that up. If you ask me something, I won't lie. But I won't share either.
This rehab treats people like me who have experienced trauma, which can escalate or trigger using behaviors.
This is a slight ramble, but I won't be here as of 9 am tomorrow, and it is helpful to write things before I have to say them out loud.
I am sorry that happened.
Member
Join Date: Nov 2015
Location: East Coast USA
Posts: 1,068
I have not been there myself but since it's somewhat near me geographically I have heard about the facility from other AA members. At least when it was called Father Martins it had very positive reviews. I wish you the best.
One side story. At an AA meeting someone shared that they decided to drive themselves to Father Martins for re-hab. They got a DUI about two miles from the facility.
One side story. At an AA meeting someone shared that they decided to drive themselves to Father Martins for re-hab. They got a DUI about two miles from the facility.
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Dec 2011
Posts: 1,226
Originally Posted by AAPJ
I have not been there myself but since it's somewhat near me geographically I have heard about the facility from other AA members. At least when it was called Father Martins it had very positive reviews. I wish you the best.
One side story. At an AA meeting someone shared that they decided to drive themselves to Father Martins for re-hab. They got a DUI about two miles from the facility.
One side story. At an AA meeting someone shared that they decided to drive themselves to Father Martins for re-hab. They got a DUI about two miles from the facility.
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Join Date: Aug 2015
Location: US
Posts: 5,095
I have not been to that particular rehab but I have been to a couple others.
The only thing I can recommend is surrender to the process. If you want to leave, which is normal, don't. You're there. Stick it out.
Bring comfy stuff. Your own pillow and comforter if they let you. Ear plugs, even a sleep mask. Ok, maybe I'm the only person that can literally not sleep for 28 days straight. It's just important to be comfortable for sure. Hopefully they have a family visitation day... if you can have snacks do it. Helps a ton!
Other than that, see it as a big ole break from everything. Soak it up.
The only thing I can recommend is surrender to the process. If you want to leave, which is normal, don't. You're there. Stick it out.
Bring comfy stuff. Your own pillow and comforter if they let you. Ear plugs, even a sleep mask. Ok, maybe I'm the only person that can literally not sleep for 28 days straight. It's just important to be comfortable for sure. Hopefully they have a family visitation day... if you can have snacks do it. Helps a ton!
Other than that, see it as a big ole break from everything. Soak it up.
Member
Join Date: Mar 2015
Location: St.Petersburg, FL.
Posts: 1,077
Hey Change. I am so glad you have this opportunity! I needed inpatient rehab to get sober; I was initially very resistant to going, until the choice was effectively taken from me. Looking back it was one of the best things I've done for myself.
Both my experiences with rehab had very little contact with the outside, and I was glad-I needed the time away from anything that would interfere with my recovery. The first rehab I attended (for 60 days) was faith-based which was interesting--out in the middle of cattle country, firmly in the Bible Belt, with me a vegetarian and a Buddhist! Still, I made many friends I never would have otherwise met and learned a lot, especially that we all have far more similarities than differences. I relapsed three years later, entered a 28-day program December 23 2015 and have been sober since.
My advice would be to embrace this experience with everything you've got. Get to know your fellows, take advantage of the program and actively participate--I learned so much from my peers. I went to the gym whenever I could and worked the stationery cycles, did yoga and guided meditation. I looked up Father Martin's and the facilities look lovely. I wish you all the best on this exciting journey. Good luck on your detox too.
Both my experiences with rehab had very little contact with the outside, and I was glad-I needed the time away from anything that would interfere with my recovery. The first rehab I attended (for 60 days) was faith-based which was interesting--out in the middle of cattle country, firmly in the Bible Belt, with me a vegetarian and a Buddhist! Still, I made many friends I never would have otherwise met and learned a lot, especially that we all have far more similarities than differences. I relapsed three years later, entered a 28-day program December 23 2015 and have been sober since.
My advice would be to embrace this experience with everything you've got. Get to know your fellows, take advantage of the program and actively participate--I learned so much from my peers. I went to the gym whenever I could and worked the stationery cycles, did yoga and guided meditation. I looked up Father Martin's and the facilities look lovely. I wish you all the best on this exciting journey. Good luck on your detox too.
No Dogma Please
Join Date: Jul 2017
Location: SoCal
Posts: 2,562
Inpatient treatment radically changed my life for the better. Although not one I'd care to repeat, it was a fascinating experience.
Detox isn't bad, if they give you a benzo taper to get through it (if alcohol is your thing). I was so sick that I welcomed it, getting the poison out of my body, being able to walk again.
Give into everything. Take everything with an open mind. You can discard anything that doesn't fit later. Be as present as you can with fellow patients and counselors.
Many people do rehab multiple times. Make the decision that you are not going to do this again, and take whatever steps to get there. Mine involved Step 1, and making the Big Plan (which I didn't know I was doing at the time) that I was no longer a drinker for any reason. Period.
Leave with a plan to stay sober. 30 days isn't enough time away from your substance to work on its own.
This is an amazing opportunity, use it wisely.
Also as mentioned above, bring comfy stuff, loose clothes, your own pillow, music, and an open mind.
Detox isn't bad, if they give you a benzo taper to get through it (if alcohol is your thing). I was so sick that I welcomed it, getting the poison out of my body, being able to walk again.
Give into everything. Take everything with an open mind. You can discard anything that doesn't fit later. Be as present as you can with fellow patients and counselors.
Many people do rehab multiple times. Make the decision that you are not going to do this again, and take whatever steps to get there. Mine involved Step 1, and making the Big Plan (which I didn't know I was doing at the time) that I was no longer a drinker for any reason. Period.
Leave with a plan to stay sober. 30 days isn't enough time away from your substance to work on its own.
This is an amazing opportunity, use it wisely.
Also as mentioned above, bring comfy stuff, loose clothes, your own pillow, music, and an open mind.
Community Greeter
Join Date: Aug 2007
Location: Upstate New York
Posts: 51,536
Change, I haven't been to treatment either. I just want to say I'm so glad you posted about what's going on.
Please never feel ashamed. I wasn't sober when I first came to SR. In my heart, I knew I was going to get there - I just wasn't realistic about the timing of it. You sound ready - and it looks like a wonderful place. I know that town, "Harbor of Grace" - the perfect spot for a new beginning. Please let us know how you're doing when possible. We're always going to care about you, Change4good.
Please never feel ashamed. I wasn't sober when I first came to SR. In my heart, I knew I was going to get there - I just wasn't realistic about the timing of it. You sound ready - and it looks like a wonderful place. I know that town, "Harbor of Grace" - the perfect spot for a new beginning. Please let us know how you're doing when possible. We're always going to care about you, Change4good.
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