brandilynncd

I have a whole host of problems both mental as well as physical.

The biggest issue I have is alcoholism.

I am afraid and need help but am scared to seek it.

Helianthus

Hi and welcome

You've already made the bravest step, admitting you have a problem and reaching out

l'm really glad you found us there's a ton of helpful information and great people to talk to here.

Good luck

Dee74

This is a safe and welcoming place brandilynncd - I hope you'll post some more

D

Anna

This is a safe place to help you deal with your alcoholism. We do understand how hard this is.

brandilynncd

i cannot stop. i have a routine and i do it every week. my drinking is hurting me financially as i gamble all my money away when i drink. it's become a habit.

im mentally messed up in the head too.

i have social problems and sexual addictions.

i can't or am afraid to go to meetings or get counseling.

Anna

Yes, you can stop. Most of us here thought we wouldn't be able to stop and we have. And, many of us have mental health issues, too. Social anxiety is hard to deal with, but it will likely be a bit easier when you are sober. No one is saying it's easy, but you can do it.

These are the resources we have for sex addiction and they may be helpful:

https://saa-recovery.org/
https://pandys.org

Shake up your routine. Make a specific plan to be doing something else so that your normal routine is changed. It will make the early days a bit easier.

MissOverIt

Hello and welcome. You’ve already made a huge step with searching out a recovery forum and posting. That is so brave and positive! You’ll find plenty of different experiences and help here. For a next step I would start reaching recovery meetings and gambling support groups in your area. I’m not sure wear you live but where I do, OR, there is a lot of free support for gambling issues. Please keep reading and posting. Hugs!

gypsytears

Hi and welcome. Of course you can stop . First thing is if you're drinking now, dump it out. Lots of info and good people on here for support until you decide what's next.

Nonsensical

When I first got here I didn't know how to stop. It was a skill I needed to learn.

I learned it by reading a lot and asking a lot of questions.

Best of Luck on Your Journey!

fini

brandilynncd, what scares you so?
if and when you can figure thatout a bit more specifically, it might get easier to go forward regardless.
connecting with others on a forum was my first step. going to a 'live' meeting took everything i had....and turned a corner for me also.
later, i needed to do some other stuff that scared me.
way to go on posting and sharing where you're at....i think any time we do something despite fear, the very doing brings benefit, no matter what else results.

stick around.

brandilynncd

im scared to change my life.

i have no friends outside of drinking. if i dont drink i am pretty much afraid to leave my house.

the only social outlet i have is phone sex with other men.

i am in debt because i gamble all of my money away.

i get depressed a lot too and i am physically and mentally declining from all of the abuse.

Dee74

I think most of us were afraid to change our lives brandilynncd - I know I was...but I drank to the point where my world shrank to one room in a crappy 2 room apartment...I realised then that not to change would be worse.

You'll have support here every step of the way and you can set the speed...no one here can force you to do anything but I hope you decide to act for change...it sounds like you deserve more out of life?

D

RanilGort

Atleast you took the first step which is to seek help somewhere, somehow. The second step is to embrace the changes that you would have to make in order to improve your life.

I have known some people who had similar addictions as you described, the ones who managed to take back control over their lives actually had to make a firm decision they were going to do so and then they had to build the concept of sobriety and what it all means for them personally if they were to live a life without any of those addictions running the show.

It is both difficult and amazing to work on this, it is difficult because in the early stages withdrawal symptoms always tend to lure you back and make it seem as if sobriety is not worth the work, it's amazing once you learn you still have the power to take back your life and give it renewed purpose.

You seem ready for it since you reached out to people on here, so have a look and become familiar with the concepts and ideas people offer through the forums as mentioned earlier. It's the start of a new life for you so understand the fear is totally normal, but it becomes atleast ''bearable'' once you have decided for yourself that this is the right thing for you to do. It's like the saying: People dont resist change, but they do resist being changed by other people. In other words with an open mind you can embrace the change and fear wont hold you back.

If other people can overcome the same addictions you currently have, then so can you and that my friend is some great news, so start looking into how to do so more and more and you'll find out there is still an opportunity for you to make a change for the better!

fini

yes, it is scary, and can seem so overwhelming that it can seem better to stay where you are...but you're here, so i take that to mean you are not wanting to stay where you are.
that is good news.
can you break things down into small steps and tackle a bit at a time? kinda like finding the courage to post and following through on that?
looks like that has "worked" well so far for you.
i'm glad you're here.

Jim1958

You can do it. Just put one day in front of another. Stop for today. See how you feel. There were times when I did not think I could go a week without drinking. Everybody starts somewhere. SR is here to help.

Dee74

Hows it going brandilynncd?

D

thomas11

This might not be what you want to hear, but you have some issues, and you are an adult, correct? They have to be dealt with in adult terms.

Its not a comfortable position to be in, but I would venture to say that almost all of us in sobriety went through some uncomfortable times. I wish you the best.

brandilynncd

Made it through the day. worked extra today to not be tempted. enjoyed being surrounded by people i got along with and made some plans as well as assess where i am at.

tomorrow is going to be tough as is the next two days since it will be my days off. those rarely end well.

Dee74

I spent a lot of time here at SR in the early days - you could do worse than do that, I think

D

Radix

brandilynncd, if you need a sober community to connect to on your days off, you can try here at SR. Some people have gotten help by agreeing to post on SR and ask permission before giving in to a craving.

One thing that helped me was to learn to challenge the thoughts that come with cravings. When I didn't give in to a craving, I'd start to feel angry, irritable, resentful, anxious, and depressed. That led me to think things like "the only way to make these feelings go away is to drink." But that's simply not true. There are many, many ways to change uncomfortable feelings, whether it's in the short term with distractions (or just waiting it out; often a craving passes in just a few minutes) or in the long term, with things like self-help strategies, peer support, or therapy.

The point is, if you want to make change, now might be just the right the time, and you have support here if you want it. Best of luck.

Making change doesn't feel good all the time, but you can do it, I promise. And on the whole you'll feel better.