Trying not to look back
 

As I work on continued sobriety, some times I become so overwhelmed with all the damage I caused myself and others in the past. An old ex-co worker at my beloved old job that I lost because of my drinking, sent me an email asking me to a join her in a get together. She meant well and I own the fact that I lost the job, but it just hurt so much realizing how much I miss them all, even though it's been 5 years. Wrote in my journal and came here to let it out. Luckily, I have a job that is not so bad and I will not drink over this.

Awake - this was a huge problem for me in the early months of getting sober. I drank at work & made a fool of myself at the end of my drinking career.

I guess the regret & remorse is useful if we don't dwell on it too long. It's a way to remember we can never allow ourselves to go back to that miserable life. I'm glad you wanted to talk about it. Maybe the get together would be helpful?

Like Jay-Z says, gotta learn to live with regrets.

Good for you for not drinking.

I struggle too with feeling sadness about what I did/didn't do when I was valuing alcohol more than everything else in my life. But the thing is we are here now and get the chance to live well. Some things I lost, some things I hurt and damaged, some chickens are still out in the fields, waiting to come home to roost. But we got ourselves sober. That's a win like none other.

Thank you for sharing the tough thoughts. Congrats on sobriety. Happy to be here with you.

I ended up drinking repeatedly because of the shame of things I had done......or more really who I had become. Going to counselling was a game changer for me because I found strength in my experiences and started to put some of that stuff behind me. It the main reason I feel able to move on now. Have you tried speaking to anyone? It might help xx