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Day four and dying

Old 08-11-2018, 10:04 AM
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Welcome, Bmc. Excellent on four days, and it does get better--I'm very glad you are here. This site has been a vital part of my sober journey--lots of advice and support. Please try not to get too discouraged at what now seem like insurmountable issues. Keep going every day, one foot in front of the other and don't drink. Just do a little bit every day and break the tasks into smaller pieces and they will eventually get done. My teeth are a wreck as well and my current task is finding out how I can get them fixed with no money, but no matter what may come sobriety makes every situation in my life more manageable.
Wishing you all the best. I hope you stick around and post often. We are here for you and we understand.
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Old 08-11-2018, 10:15 AM
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You WILL make it! I made it. 2 DWIs but it is possible! Lot of support here and this is a safe place for venting.
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Old 08-11-2018, 01:55 PM
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Thinking of you & hoping it's going ok, Bmc.
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Old 08-11-2018, 02:20 PM
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Originally Posted by Hevyn View Post
Thinking of you & hoping it's going ok, Bmc.

Much gratitude to all of you for the welcome and thoughtful words of encouragement. I feel like I’ve been living (but yet not really living) in a closet for years, and while this is incredibly difficult and painful, finding support on this site has already helped me with day 5. Example- many of you reminded me to “just not drink” today, and because of YOU, I was able to not go down the WINE AISLE at the grocery store today. Did I want to? Of course; savignon blanc is my BEST FRIEND EVUH!!! (Not)- but your voices came into my head and reminded me “just don’t drink.” And so I didn’t. Thank you. Much love and support to you all. I look forward to getting to know y’all better. -B
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Old 08-11-2018, 02:52 PM
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Originally Posted by Bmc1105 View Post
Much gratitude to all of you for the welcome and thoughtful words of encouragement. I feel like I’ve been living (but yet not really living) in a closet for years, and while this is incredibly difficult and painful, finding support on this site has already helped me with day 5. Example- many of you reminded me to “just not drink” today, and because of YOU, I was able to not go down the WINE AISLE at the grocery store today. Did I want to? Of course; savignon blanc is my BEST FRIEND EVUH!!! (Not)- but your voices came into my head and reminded me “just don’t drink.” And so I didn’t. Thank you. Much love and support to you all. I look forward to getting to know y’all better. -B
That’s great to hear! I can pass by alcohol and not want it... until I want it. Something triggers me even if I don’t know what, and I just start obsessing over it. You will have those days too, you’ll feel tired, hopeless, lonely and you won’t feel as strong as you do today. Just be prepared and come here as often as you can and let yourself eat whatever you want instead of caving into the wine, in these early days most of us could eat anything and still take in less calories than when we drank! Once I feel better I start to DO better, EAT better and LOVE better. And you will tackle the tasks you have before you when this takes place. You’re an exhausted mother, but you found a great place of support now. And I too had dental work I put off. I finally had it done and they set up a payment plan for me. If you’re in pain don’t put that off. Many dentists do take payment plans. Start to chip away at everything you need and want to get done but don’t overdo it, rest and ask for help when you need it.
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Old 08-11-2018, 02:56 PM
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Good stuff, B! I would get so anxious going near the wine and beer aisle at first. Like sweaty palms, racing heart anxious. Now I mentally give it the finger and silently send good vibes to the people who struggled like me, letting it control and destroy their lives, wishing to the universe they could say no, but leaving with a couple bottles anyways. So grateful i endured that anxiety and made it through the first 30 days. After that it got much easier.
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Old 08-11-2018, 04:56 PM
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There's many ways of looking at a situation, if at the time of your posting you were at day 4, that's a postive thing! think about it, its the start of true sobriety! as long as we dont indulge we are in the process of sobering up. The real trick in a way as I like to describe it is to; make peace with who you are and were you are in life.

The first few days of withdrawal and sobering up whether its drugs or alcohol are always hard both mentally and physically, we just gotta ride that wave straight to the shores of sobriety. If you can stick to that, I can promise you, life will be seen from a new perspective. Alcohol can float around through the body manipulating our perception of life, it is this insidious aspect that can lure us back rather quickly in early sobriety.

It's very important for you realize you are not alone and there is nothing wrong with you at all. You might think there is, but that is like beating up on yourself when our addiction is already doing a good enough job as it is. If you can shift your perception just a little bit, things start to improve and you'll realize that everyday you aren't drinking, means you're taking back control of your life!

You deserve the very best life has to offer and it shall come to you in sobriety if you let it and are willing to embrace it, one day at a time. Just be conscious of this whole process so you can actually notice the difference, alcohol might bring temporary relief, joy, etc, but the real joy of living comes from within and it's right there, wherever you are, ready to be recognized by you
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Old 08-11-2018, 06:03 PM
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Welcome bmc. Good job on four days. I am on day four as well. I can resonate with everything you are feeling. I am new here too. I posted earlier in the year but have been just watching every since. But by being on SR the last few days has really helped a lot and made me feel less alone. Let's take this one day at a time together.

Today was a rough one for me as well but I made it and so can you. My house is a mess too and I am struggling with guilt over my kids too but we are here and that is a first step. We can't go back but we can make our future better.

There is a thread where you check in every 24 hours and an August thread that is really good.

Take care
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Old 08-11-2018, 10:27 PM
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Also had a dui in very early 2015. And by very early 2015, I mean NYE and I got out of jail Jan 1, 2015. Worst moment of my life. Worst “walk of shame” ever, which was what the other dui kids who got bailed out at the same time I did made cracks about. After all that, I went home...my car was thisclose to being totaled from said stint in jail...and even THAT didnt wake me up. I stopped drinking for about 1-2 weeks back then afterwards. Then i was right back to it.. And being NYE, I just chalked it up to a bad end to a party night.

Now that i WANT to be booze free, now that I’ve addressed the underlying problem and realize that every night is not just a party night, it’s a whole other story. I am facing my problems. They’re not just a New Years gone wrong. I totally get where you’re coming from and good for you drinking the tea Instead!!
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Old 08-11-2018, 11:28 PM
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Hi BMC. Just try and take care of yourself and your kids the first few days. It's rough and re-hydrating help, lots of water. There will be time to sort out the things you need to. It's needs to be about self-care in the first little while. Best wishes to you xx
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