I need someone tonight
Member
Join Date: Nov 2004
Location: Port Arthur, Tx
Posts: 30
Anyway I get so emotionally worn out that my mind won't calm down for awhile. Especially since he wakes every hour or so and screams and yells some more. Even if I went to sleep; he would be sure to wake me; so that he's not miserable by himself
RE-member- DONT QUIT!
Join Date: Apr 2004
Location: right where I'm supposed to be
Posts: 348
Hey dixie, just checking back in to see how you are doing. thats great you got some chocolate. I dont see you signed on so I'm hoping you are sleeping peacefully now. I am praying for you to have strength to get through the night. you will feel so much better and be able to deal with these urges even more if you can. you can do it, hang in there 
mike
mike
tha toastah
Join Date: Sep 2004
Location: montreal, quebec
Posts: 191
dixie-- YOU GO GIRL!
damn i am happy for you. that mustve been hard. i know that kindof situation all to well and carrying a feeling you just dont wanna spill is very painfull. good for you for letting it out. and STAYING SOBER!
stay strong, you deserve it
damn i am happy for you. that mustve been hard. i know that kindof situation all to well and carrying a feeling you just dont wanna spill is very painfull. good for you for letting it out. and STAYING SOBER!
stay strong, you deserve it
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Oct 2004
Location: Where Am I?
Posts: 247
I MADE IT THROUGH!!!! I am so glad I had all of you last night! I was sooooo scared that I was going to give in and do something that I did not want to do. I kept my phone off and did not once let that guy get back in touch with me. Today I woke up with no guilt or shame and happy that I made it through the night drug free. 
What a great feeling!
Dixie
What a great feeling!Dixie
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Oct 2004
Location: Where Am I?
Posts: 247
Oh, and the guy I wrote that email too is different from the guy who kept calling me. The guy I wrote to doesnt use. I hope he doesnt read too much into the love thing because I enjoy his friendship and that is all we can be at this point in our lives. I hope he will still stick around with me its just that I wanted to tell him what was on my mind.
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Oct 2004
Location: Where Am I?
Posts: 247
FrstdOne, yes I got the suggestion about changing my phone number. I'm thinking about changing it. I know that would be a great thing but I really like this number. I guess the odds of him ever losing it are slim to none right? And probably as long as I keep this number he will call and try to get me back into cocaine.
Member
Join Date: Nov 2004
Location: Right here.
Posts: 105
Awesome Dixie!
Congrats on the 30. Keep stacking them up!
It's a great feeling to overcome that temptation and wake up the next day clean and sober, isn't it? Every time I do it I can feel my self confidence getting stronger and stronger.
Just keep reminding yourself that the things that are most worthwhile in life are the things that we have to work our butts off for. I had a rough time with temptation last night, too, but I definitely feel stronger for having gotten through it and woken up this morning without a hangover. (Day 13 here. )
Congrats on the 30. Keep stacking them up!
It's a great feeling to overcome that temptation and wake up the next day clean and sober, isn't it? Every time I do it I can feel my self confidence getting stronger and stronger.
Just keep reminding yourself that the things that are most worthwhile in life are the things that we have to work our butts off for. I had a rough time with temptation last night, too, but I definitely feel stronger for having gotten through it and woken up this morning without a hangover. (Day 13 here.
)
Learning To Let It Be
Join Date: Oct 2004
Location: New York
Posts: 156
Originally Posted by dixielove
FrstdOne, yes I got the suggestion about changing my phone number. I'm thinking about changing it. I know that would be a great thing but I really like this number. I guess the odds of him ever losing it are slim to none right? And probably as long as I keep this number he will call and try to get me back into cocaine.
And, congratulations on your 30! That's excellent! :hoo
Stepping Through Life...
Member
Join Date: Aug 2004
Location: Des Moines, IA
Posts: 184
FrstdOne, yes I got the suggestion about changing my phone number. I'm thinking about changing it. I know that would be a great thing but I really like this number. I guess the odds of him ever losing it are slim to none right? And probably as long as I keep this number he will call and try to get me back into cocaine.
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Oct 2004
Location: Where Am I?
Posts: 247
I wrote my friend another email and told him that the email I wrote last night was an accidental send. I told him I was just writing my feelings and didnt intend on sending that but somehow it got sent. I love him but we are just friends and I have to respect the situation and how it is. I love him dearly but his friendship means so much to me. God has blessed me with his friendship. I nearly lost his friendship when I was using because I said some pretty mean things to him but I'm sober now and he says it's all water under the bridge. He is a great friend.
Many blessings today,
Dixie
Many blessings today,
Dixie
Member
Join Date: Oct 2004
Location: fumbling towards ecstasy
Posts: 2,551
(((Dixie))) I am so proud of you for getting through last night's temptation! Congrats on 30 days, you definitely earned it. And you know what the best things is? The more you resist those urges, the easier it gets. Yeah! Good for you. Keep strong and clean just for today and yesterday and tomorrow will take care of themselves.
jojo
jojo
RE-member- DONT QUIT!
Join Date: Apr 2004
Location: right where I'm supposed to be
Posts: 348
Great news dixie I'm so glad you made it through, you should be very proud of yourself. And 30 days today to top it off, Awesome congrats, keep it up, your doing great!! mike
I'm so glad you made it through, you should be very proud of yourself. And 30 days today to top it off, Awesome congrats, keep it up, your doing great!! mike
Member
Join Date: Oct 2004
Location: Birmingham,Michigan
Posts: 35
some limericks i wrote that i live by
Dear Dixie, Here are some limericks i wrote that i live by i hope you enjoy them i wrote them when i was in a funk usually.
So many books i've never read
So many roads i've never tread,
so many lives i've never lived,
so many things that are a derivative,
of what may have come before,
always that and nothing more.
-Copyright 2004 Greg Gumina
Bury me now and recovery me later,
if anyone asks just tell them i paid her.
-Copyright 2004 Greg Gumina
I consider that one an upper because it gives me a laugh even when i'm not in a funk.
The classical ideal
is living to the appeal,
of what we really feel,
of what we find to be real.
-Copyright 2004 Greg Gumina
and for laughs this is the only one i could right without being racist
Asian girls are real wise,
they can tell from the look in your eyes,
whether you're telling the truth,
or whether you're a pack of lies.
-Copyright 2004 Greg Gumina
I told that to an asian girl at college one time and she's like "they can?"
Don't worry Dixie everything's gonna be alright you're gonna be just fine here have a poem.
Dixie is the heart and soul, she is the living mold of the society that binds us together addict or not she's as light as a feather. And while we may be troubled souls we're here for her through and through, she's always looking out through the eyeglass of the telescope. And i'm always standing tall like a statue. I tend to wonder what the world is like out there in the great beyond, and then i see a girl like dixie and i can't help but be fond of the idea that there's a lady who is struggling every day. For she deserves as much care and compassion from those around her, in every possible way, Amen.
I hope to hear from you soon,good luck in all you do.
Signed,
Greg
So many books i've never read
So many roads i've never tread,
so many lives i've never lived,
so many things that are a derivative,
of what may have come before,
always that and nothing more.
-Copyright 2004 Greg Gumina
Bury me now and recovery me later,
if anyone asks just tell them i paid her.
-Copyright 2004 Greg Gumina
I consider that one an upper because it gives me a laugh even when i'm not in a funk. The classical ideal
is living to the appeal,
of what we really feel,
of what we find to be real.
-Copyright 2004 Greg Gumina
and for laughs this is the only one i could right without being racist
Asian girls are real wise,
they can tell from the look in your eyes,
whether you're telling the truth,
or whether you're a pack of lies.
-Copyright 2004 Greg Gumina
I told that to an asian girl at college one time and she's like "they can?" Don't worry Dixie everything's gonna be alright you're gonna be just fine here have a poem.
Dixie is the heart and soul, she is the living mold of the society that binds us together addict or not she's as light as a feather. And while we may be troubled souls we're here for her through and through, she's always looking out through the eyeglass of the telescope. And i'm always standing tall like a statue. I tend to wonder what the world is like out there in the great beyond, and then i see a girl like dixie and i can't help but be fond of the idea that there's a lady who is struggling every day. For she deserves as much care and compassion from those around her, in every possible way, Amen.
I hope to hear from you soon,good luck in all you do.
Signed,
Greg
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Oct 2004
Location: Where Am I?
Posts: 247
I have great news. I changed my phone number!! That is a big step for me because that is officially closing the door that I had unconsciously left open. Now my old friends who use cannot contact me because I'm no longer there to answer those calls!! Thanks for the great advice. It was hard in deciding to change my number but I am so glad I did.
Dixie
Dixie
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