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-   -   Does it really keep getting better? (https://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/newcomers-recovery/430893-does-really-keep-getting-better.html)

Finalcall 08-04-2018 04:12 PM

Does it really keep getting better?
 
3 weeks sober and proud of it.
Over 10 years of pretty much everyday drinking roughly 12 beers give or take some spirits or wine.
People here with lots more sober time than i keep saying it gets better. What can i expect to get better. More to the point at what time frames did people look back and realize that it was the best decision they ever made.
Keeping motivated..
Thanks

Caralara144 08-04-2018 04:20 PM

Yes I can assure you my friend it really does get better...
And better and better
I'm feeling so much better at just over 7 months ..I'm not craving a drink anymore
I went on my first holiday an was nervous and it did trigger me a bit but I pushed on through that and had a brilliant time
There is no time date, It just falls into place
Like when I quit I dreaded the weekends so much ...I never seen the transaction taking place where suddenly I loved my weekends
Taking my daughter to the cinema .. shopping
Binging on Netflix
It's a gradual process but so so worth it
Stick with it
You will reap the benefits of being sober in no time
All the luck in the world
Cara x

tomsteve 08-04-2018 04:23 PM

3rd day in i didnt wake up with a hangover- things already got better.

time frames vary by person and the depth they sunk.


cant say when i thought getting sober( and getting help to do that, look at the underlying issues, and learn how to live life on lifes terms) but i know when i was diagnosed stage 3 metastatic melanoma about 11 months in i was dam greatful to be sober as long as i had.

comtnman740 08-04-2018 04:27 PM

Hey there,
I would definately say that it keeps getting better! Although as we know at is one day at a time. Personally i think there are dips in my emotional sobriety at times but it light years ahead of where i was close to 18 months ago. Life doesn't stop because we get sober but if we continue to do the things that we do to stay sober there is no reason why are lives can't continue to improve and be amazing.
God Bless

FreeOwl 08-04-2018 04:44 PM

Yes.

At least, that’s been my experience.

At what point did I look back upon my choice of sobriety as the best choice of my life?

I can’t really even recall them all.

I know that year 1 was really a challenge.... but things did get better.

Year 2 brought new surprises and deeper work to be done on myself.... but still it got better despite some tough times.

Year 3 I started really coming to terms with my depression and anxiety and working toward a better understanding of and work on it all. Still, things got better.

Year 4 I felt like I blossomed a lot... finally felt truly and deeply aware of myself and really quite good about myself despite still struggling with depression.

Year 5 is nearly a full year and things do keep getting better... on every level.

But also it’s taken continuously going deeper - in sobriety, in life, in purpose, in giving, in service, in building a rich, full life.

None of which would be happening without my sobriety.

Your experience will be your own - but if you commit yourself not only to sobriety but to ever-deepening sobriety and the creation of a meaningful life..... it will get better and better and better.

FreeOwl 08-04-2018 04:45 PM

Oh and as for ‘what can I expect’....

Don’t worry to much about that. You’ll be amazed at how unexpected all the awesomeness will be!!

Buckley3 08-04-2018 05:09 PM

Just being sober improves a lot of things. Addition by subtraction.

From there it varies person to person, situation to situation. Like a lot of life you get out what you put in.

B

Dee74 08-04-2018 05:16 PM

I drank for 20 years - I started to feel better at 3 months and to feel my life was getting back in order.

Some people feel better before that, some later but I still think it's a pretty good deal :)

D

theVman31 08-04-2018 05:37 PM

Hi finalcall.
"Does it really keep getting better?"
The answer is YES.
Over 20 years drinking too.
After a few months feeling way better.

One thing is for sure : if you go back and keep drinking it will get alot worse...

least 08-04-2018 05:58 PM

Yes! It gets better but you've got to stay sober! If you drink you'll start the cycle all over, and that's miserable. Google kindling and you'll find out why withdrawal gets worse the more you go thru it. :(

August252015 08-04-2018 06:07 PM

I was extremely ill when I quit drinking at 39. I turned 42 yesterday with 2 and a half yrs sober.

I could pinpoint specifics or times when things got better, or somehow changed or elaborate on the gradually smoothing out of the roller coaster that was my life drunk.

Instead, like AA suggests when sharing our experience, strength and hope- I'm going to be specific about that last one.

The hope part is m answer to YES it all gets better. Better meaning... clearer, as far as everything from making good choices to seeing reality as it actually is. Meaning easier because I am honest and knowing right from wrong isn't skewed. Joyful because I don't suffer from the shame, regret and other terrible consequences from my behavior and poor choices.

Physically, I am beyond fortunate that I not only didn't die, but until a back injury three months ago had gotten into e best health and shape of my life. Coming back from that is something I only get to do because I got sober in the first place.

Emotionally I can have good relationships and deserve them. Spiritually, I know that my higher power is he reason I am here and have the life I do now.

Easier because it is a REAL life, better because whatever happens now, I can deal with it- and have others who love me to help me, and vice versa. I could keep going about recovery being he best backdrop of a life I could ever want, but I hope it's obvious.

courage2 08-04-2018 06:35 PM


Originally Posted by Finalcall (Post 6974658)
at what time frames did people look back and realize it was the best decision they ever made.

Every day for the past 4.5 years--well, after the few weeks of complete mocus and crap. But even then, glad to be out of hell.

And in more and more ways every new day.

Outonthetiles 08-04-2018 06:51 PM

Yes, it definitely keeps getting better, and by being sober, I've been able to work on deeper underlying issues that I drank to cover up.

MissPerfumado 08-04-2018 07:44 PM

IME, it got better almost immediately. I had a week of sleeping badly, but the compensation was not being hungover, having overall clearer thinking (still foggy here and there, but overall better), and the huge feeling of relief that I was finally doing something about my drinking.

At 8 weeks, my body felt like a switch flipped, and all the exercising I was doing in recovery made a sudden and impressive impact. I began to build muscle and lost my wine belly and that really gave me a huge motivational lift, health-wise.

All the while, my job situation improved, my finances improved, my confidence improved...

At 6 months, I began to struggle occasionally with social anxiety. But still it was better than drinking. I could face the issues calmly, and start looking into ways to address it. It went away after about a year.

At 12-15 months, I began to dig into the meaning of my life and how to contribute to a better world. A lot of deep issues came up over the following months. Some really tricky emotional times followed ... struggling with work and wondering whether to continue with my job. Still it was better than drinking! I found a new path and now I'm enjoying it. There are still twists and turns, but I can deal with them.

Why is it always better to be sober? Because I have HOPE that I can find a way through. When I was drinking, I was slowly losing hope for a better future.

Finalcall 08-04-2018 08:07 PM

Thanks for the comments

Dustitoffman 08-05-2018 03:33 AM

Yes it's true.

I am now in a far better place than I was at the start.
My recovery is a very slow story exacerbated by other issues.

I drank at 3 months and this put my recovery back to the start not just by the clock they call it kindling.
I had to go through the bad stuff all over again.
Don't make that mistake. I tried it and got the full face slap as payment.

Stay strong and keep going one step at a time👌

Sunflowerlife 08-05-2018 03:52 AM

For me, my mood stabilized after 6 or 8 months, and that's what I need to "get better" because I was all over the place in early sobriety. Crying, angry, up and down constantly. But I knew it was worth it from Day 1. No more hangovers, no more shame and guilt over things I had done, no more self hate.

Give yourself more time to heal. This is a huge change your body, mind and soul is going through! It is worth it, I promise you...

John65 08-05-2018 03:53 AM

I think things do get better as each day passes but it's when I get to around 3 months that I get a spring in my step and think to myself, wow, what a difference!

August252015 08-05-2018 04:01 AM

Just another note- I considered myself in early sobriety for a long time. A year and a half or so. If you look at people's notes above, there is similarity to the timelines for change- all the "better" takes time. More than we want it to for sure!

Like others said, staying sober and working on ourselves is the path to better.

Culture 08-05-2018 07:51 AM

Have to agree with the others, month 3 it got better. You do have to do the work though and deal with your fears and issues as they pop up but your ability to cope with life without that crutch gets stronger as you go along and before you know it, you'll realise a week has gone by without thinking about drinking. Could never have said that 11 months ago.


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