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Old 07-19-2018, 03:34 AM
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Relapsed

I am quite a bad way just now, desperately trying to stop for first complete day.

I have stopped drinking for periods quite a few times anywhere from a few weeks to a few month. Once I get past the initial few days I feel alright so much so that I start thinking I can control and end back drinking.

Been going to smart recovery meetings and am working through their tools such as cost benefit of drinking and not drinking. Just need to get that first day in.

Tried AA before but not really my thing.
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Old 07-19-2018, 03:57 AM
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Gerard, I don't know if this will help you but it helped me this last time around. I made a plan to taper off with my drinking over the course of the next four days, then quit on Day 5. I told someone whose regard I respect that this is what I was going to do. And then I stopped. Just stopped! I figured I'd get through that one day. And the next day I did the same. No drama, no sweeping declarations, no swearing off. Just stopped.

It was a very quiet event, and it was only for me that I did it. Aside from reporting my progress to that one person (and here), there is no public announcement. No shame, either. It just happens to be that I'm not drinking today. 38 todays later, it feels like the thing I do. It's not necessarily comfortable, nor is it uncomfortable. It just is. And I do like it better than the aftermath/continuation of yesterday's misery.

So glad you're here posting and going to SMART too - that's a great beginning.

O

p.s. It's not recommended around here to taper as it's very difficult to keep things in check once you start drinking. There are plenty of other ways to get to Day 1 - pick one!
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Old 07-19-2018, 04:18 AM
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Thk Obladi well done on day 38.

The way I feel just is the worst physically and mentally. Keep telling myself it will get better when I have stopped. Also seriously worried about my health with amount I have been drinking.
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Old 07-19-2018, 05:06 AM
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Welcome! Most of us have been there, Gerard. Start feeling better and believing we can have a drink or two. Then starting the cycle all over again. Not a good plan! Stick by here and read and post. You will find a lot of support to help you quit for good.
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Old 07-19-2018, 05:07 AM
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I hear ya. Stopping is hard, staying stopped is even harder....for awhile. Many of us have made the mistake of thinking we can "control" it. We can't, and it just gets worse, right?
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