What if you drink to die
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Join Date: Aug 2015
Location: US
Posts: 5,095
I think the 'what's the point?' question is one most desperate addicts have asked themselves when in the thick of their addiction....I know I have. And then, having come pretty darn close to killing myself, I realized that I may not know exactly why I wanted to live, but I sure knew I didn't want to die. But I had to be sober in order to truly ponder that question with any logic at all.
Member
Join Date: Sep 2014
Posts: 780
I was like that; I just wanted to drink to die. I didn't care. Until I almost DID die, and then I realized how much I wanted to live. You often hear that from people who lived after (honest) suicide attempts as well....that they were so happy they were given a second chance.
A few on here preach gratitude. Do you practice that?
A few on here preach gratitude. Do you practice that?
Member
Join Date: May 2018
Posts: 268
Drinking is a slow miserable death. In my case it is also a wish for death but it's a bad choice. I don't have much to live for anymore so sometimes I mix in some pills then totally black out, like yesterday I don't know what I did.
Member
Join Date: Mar 2018
Location: Australia
Posts: 73
Originally Posted by Laura3 
Drinking is a slow miserable death. In my case it is also a wish for death but it's a bad choice. I don't have much to live for anymore so sometimes I mix in some pills then totally black out, like yesterday I don't know what I did.
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Join Date: Apr 2014
Location: UK
Posts: 6,902
You know, if you wanted to die there would be far less convoluted and painful ways to do it. And you probably wouldn't be logging on to a sobriety site if there wasn't at least a part of you that wants to give sober living a try.
Jesus died on the cross to save us, because he loved us. Not because he was giving up on life. At the end of my drinking I wanted to die, but it was nothing to do with Jesus or God. It was because of my own addictive and insane thinking. Thankfully sobriety and working a good recovery program made a lot of difference to the way that I perceived the world. Turned out my perspective was just as screwed as my drinking off-button was. My off-button couldn't be fixed, but my perspective could be. Given time and work. But the first step was getting sober.
I hope you'll give yourself the chance to feel God's love, peace, grace and mercy as well. This world can be a great experience when we turn from addiction to connection.
BB
Jesus died on the cross to save us, because he loved us. Not because he was giving up on life. At the end of my drinking I wanted to die, but it was nothing to do with Jesus or God. It was because of my own addictive and insane thinking. Thankfully sobriety and working a good recovery program made a lot of difference to the way that I perceived the world. Turned out my perspective was just as screwed as my drinking off-button was. My off-button couldn't be fixed, but my perspective could be. Given time and work. But the first step was getting sober.
I hope you'll give yourself the chance to feel God's love, peace, grace and mercy as well. This world can be a great experience when we turn from addiction to connection.
BB
Member
Join Date: Mar 2018
Location: Australia
Posts: 73
Originally Posted by Laura3
There are a lot of reasons I don't want to get into right now
I was thinking tonight about how I have felt earlier this year as I struggled with my personal addiction. While I am sure that my sufferings are nothing near what you are suffering through there is one thing I know.
No matter how clearly we think we see the world when we have got some distance we see how mistaken we really were. You may want to die today. Things may be absolutely terrible and you might even not be able to see a way out of the place you are now. But if you push through and start fighting again today anything is possible.
That old saying 'things are darkest before the dawn' is 100% true. Generally at the exact point that we think the dawn will never come the first glimmer of light is just about to crest the horizon.
Start the fight for yourself today Laura. Being an addict is nothing to be ashamed of. If you are an addict and you fight it and eventually triumph over it (even if that triumph is just for one day) then you are already stronger than the majority of the normies.
Administrator
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,435
Originally Posted by Laura3
Drinking is a slow miserable death. In my case it is also a wish for death but it's a bad choice. I don't have much to live for anymore so sometimes I mix in some pills then totally black out, like yesterday I don't know what I did.
https://www.soberrecovery.com/forums...ease-read.html
I thought I had a death wish when I was drinking - but then I really did nearly die...and I fought like a wildcat to stay alive...
The fact your're here and posting leads me to suspect that there's a part of you that does want to fight for your life Laura - fan that flame
Reaching out for help could be the first step on that journey?
D
No Dogma Please
Join Date: Jul 2017
Location: SoCal
Posts: 2,562
Originally Posted by fini
well, if you take humanity (family, relationship) and spiritual sustenance ( religion, and your belief in jesus) out of the equation, you're taking pretty much everything out that makes us human and leaving yourself at the biological level, more or less.
you are asking: what is meaningful after i take the meaningful things out of the equation?
you're boxing yourself into a corner.
you are asking: what is meaningful after i take the meaningful things out of the equation?
you're boxing yourself into a corner.
Yet I am in no way ready to throw in the towel.
I am truly loving myself and my life since I stopped drinking. Life itself is it’s own reward.
Member
Join Date: Jan 2018
Posts: 327
The good old question of what's the meaning of life? 😀
I came up with a saying, after reading a Tony Robbins book, that purpose plus service equals fulfillment.
When we find something that motivates us, which can help others at the same time, we will feel fulfilled.
It's not about money or things.
What motivates you? How can you help someone else? I think when we can answer those two questions, you are on the right path.
I came up with a saying, after reading a Tony Robbins book, that purpose plus service equals fulfillment.
When we find something that motivates us, which can help others at the same time, we will feel fulfilled.
It's not about money or things.
What motivates you? How can you help someone else? I think when we can answer those two questions, you are on the right path.
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